| Jul 23, 2010 @ 4:33 PM |
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tassie1
Posts: 7,839
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 that would be my luck too missy sqwirl
One dismal rainy night, a taxi driver spotted an arm waving from the shadows of an alley halfway down the block. Even before he rolled to a stop at the curb, a figure leaped into the cab and slammed the door. Checking his rear view mirror as he pulled away, he was startled to see a dripping wet, naked woman sitting in the back seat.
"Where to?" he stammered.
"Union Station," answered the woman.
"You got it," he said, taking another long glance in the mirror.
The woman caught him staring at her and asked, "Just what the hell are you looking at, driver?"
"Well ma'am, I noticed that you're completely naked, and I was just wondering how you'll pay your fare."
The woman spread her legs, put her feet up on the front seat, smiled at the driver and said, "Does *THIS* answer your question?"
Still looking in the mirror, the cabbie asked, "Got anything smaller?"
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| Jul 24, 2010 @ 12:26 AM |
tassie's place.blah,blah,blah. |
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SpunkyRed
Posts: 10,449
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| Jul 24, 2010 @ 8:03 AM |
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tassie1
Posts: 7,839
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I know...soooooo wrong
but still funny
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| Jul 24, 2010 @ 4:41 PM |
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SpunkyRed
Posts: 10,449
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yeah..ubetcha 
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| Jul 25, 2010 @ 6:57 AM |
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tassie1
Posts: 7,839
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this ones even more wicked 
Why is it that a woman can guide
a 1&1/2 inch diameter penis
into a 1 inch diameter vagina
in pitch black darkness
without looking
and cannot park a 6 foot car
in a 7 foot parking spot
in broad daylight?
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| Jul 25, 2010 @ 3:36 PM |
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SpunkyRed
Posts: 10,449
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WoW Tass...ya really know how to cut the heart in two??? ..that was funny
Okay I admit it.....I cannot parallel park my car...and it's only a chevy cavalier!! pretty pathetic eh?
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| Jul 25, 2010 @ 6:15 PM |
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tassie1
Posts: 7,839
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you'd be amazed at how many ppl over here can't reverse park into a space in a street ...and its part of your driving test 
 check out the blog I posted today 
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| Jul 26, 2010 @ 12:35 AM |
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SpunkyRed
Posts: 10,449
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I did and it's pretty darn funny
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| Jul 26, 2010 @ 6:40 AM |
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tassie1
Posts: 7,839
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I thought it might have been a bit long to put in here
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| Jul 26, 2010 @ 9:28 AM |
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tassie1
Posts: 7,839
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oh ok, one more just for you .
 Paddy is planning to marry, and asks his family doctor how he could
tell if his bride-to-be is still a virgin. 
His doctor says, "Aye, Paddy, all Irish use three things for what we call a
Do-It-Yourself..... Virginity Test Kit.... a small can of red paint, a small can of blue paint and a shovel."
Paddy asks, "Aye, and what do I do with these things, doctor?" 
The doctor replies, "Before ye climb into bed on your wedding night, you
paint one of your balls red and the other ball blue .
If she says, "That's the strangest pair of balls I ever did see...", you hit her with the shovel.'
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| Jul 27, 2010 @ 7:41 AM |
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SpunkyRed
Posts: 10,449
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whattttttttttt....so wrong but so funny
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| Jul 27, 2010 @ 8:03 AM |
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tassie1
Posts: 7,839
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now thats one that doc would luv 
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| Jul 27, 2010 @ 5:15 PM |
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tassie1
Posts: 7,839
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dammit, is there a sale on the other side of town or something. ?
A man comes home from a tough day of work looking to unwind. After a relaxing dinner with his wife, they retire to their twin beds.
However, the man was not yet ready to slumber, and called over to his wife.
"My little boopey-boo, I'm lonely."
So the woman gets out of bed and crosses the room to the husband. On the way, she trips on the carpet and falls on her face.
The husband, with a concerned look on his face says, "Oh, did my little honey-bunny fall on her little nosey-wosey?"
The woman just smiles, gets up and enters hubby's bed. The two have passionate sex, and afterwards the woman rolls out.
As she is returning to her bed, she once again catches her foot on the carpet and falls flat on her face.
The man looks over his shoulder at his wife lying on the floor and says, "Clumsy bitch." 
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| Jul 28, 2010 @ 10:30 AM |
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SpunkyRed
Posts: 10,449
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| Jul 29, 2010 @ 5:38 AM |
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tassie1
Posts: 7,839
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 where ya bin babydoll.
I've even had to talk to myself around here but I'm not doing that anymore...we had a fight this morning so that jerk can go to hell.
The middle-aged wife had just returned to the house on Saturday afternoon after a shopping trip. She was quite agitated, and proceeded to tell her husband about a certain shoe salesman who had been rude.
It seems she was sitting down while he helped her try on various shoes, and happened to glance up and notice that she was not wearing any knickers under her dress. Without even thinking, he just blurted out, "If that thing was full of ice cream, I'd eat every bite."
Well, she was understandably insulted, and now wanted to know what her husband was going to do about it.
The husband just sat there, watching football on TV, and grunted. The wife became hysterical, and insisted on knowing why he didn't go down to the shop and punch the rude salesman right in the nose.
"Well", the husband replied, "There are three reasons I won't punch that guy in the nose. First of all, you shouldn't have even been shopping for shoes, since you have a whole wardrobe full of them. Secondly, you have no business going shopping with no knickers on. But most of all, I'm not going to punch anyone who's big enough to eat that much ice cream!"
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| Jul 29, 2010 @ 8:53 AM |
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SpunkyRed
Posts: 10,449
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Ohhh....I've been around...gallavantin'! lol I've got my appointment today, with my doctor...my follow up appt from when I was in the hospital. Just a check up..nothing major.
Pretty funnnnnnny lmao
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| Jul 30, 2010 @ 1:16 PM |
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SpunkyRed
Posts: 10,449
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...Happy Friday!!!!!!!...    
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| Jul 31, 2010 @ 2:51 AM |
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SpunkyRed
Posts: 10,449
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WoW....where are ya Tass.....anybody??!!?? Echooo....Echooooo lol 
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| Jul 31, 2010 @ 3:34 PM |
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tassie1
Posts: 7,839
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high there
been stuck at work again, even called in that stuck up sister of mine to lend a hand.
next time I might ask her to lend 2 so she'll do something constructive.
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| Aug 1, 2010 @ 9:46 PM |
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SpunkyRed
Posts: 10,449
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Ohh...I hope she's doin' okay!!!!! Give her my love
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