AddThis Social Bookmark Button
Free Dating
search My Threads  

Main    Dating & Romance   

Why don’t women like nice guys?


Dec 9, 2007 @ 5:26 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
todger45


Posts: 3
When you talk to women, or read there profiles they all ask the same things namely “honesty, faithfulness and kindness”, not always in those words I know, but when they actually meet a guy with these characteristics they get ”Bored” and so stray away. I just do not understand why a woman asks for a nice genuine guy, but really wants a “bit of rough” and is willing to be abused to have that. Why, what’s wrong with being with someone who actually cares about you.
post reply view todger45's threads
Dec 9, 2007 @ 6:47 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
lolthisistoofunny


Posts: 511
I want a nice guy and I don't want rough at all...but I also want a man with whom there is a mutual attraction. If there is no sexual/romantic chemistry, all the "nice" in the world won't make a bit of difference.
post reply view lolthisistoofunny's threads
Dec 10, 2007 @ 9:50 AM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
todger45


Posts: 3
Hi lolt, I am not talking about attraction or chemistry, I know that is required for any type of relationship, I am talking about the character, why women get bored with someone they once were very attracted to, had that sexual chemistry with etc but because the “nice” person is just that ie “nice” they then start to look for someone who will treat them badly, For example, I was very happily married for 7 years, we had a great life, we were deeply in love with each other and had an adventurous and fulfilling sex life, then my ex changed jobs, and started working with a guy who, in her words, thought the sun shone out of his arse, was totally a womaniser and never stopped flirting, she eventually left me for this guy, who is now having affairs all over the place, my ex has become withdrawn, lost confidence and is nothing like she was, but she won’t leave him, Not to come back to me I hasten to add, but she feels unable to even find someone else and is willing to put up with his antics. Even my young daughter who lives with her has said he is not a very nice guy, and she keeps out of his way. I have heard many similar stories like this, and just wanted to hear the female perspective on it.
post reply view todger45's threads
Dec 10, 2007 @ 2:04 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
lolthisistoofunny


Posts: 511
Well, in your original post, you said, "Why do women...?" not "Why did my wife...?"

Why your wife got bored, I have no idea. Maybe you weren't paying attention to her. Maybe she felt like she was missing something. I don't know why some people do the things they do, but, from my experience, people tend to take others far, far too much for granted. Then, much later, after it's too late, they realize what they have lost.
post reply view lolthisistoofunny's threads
Dec 10, 2007 @ 2:07 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
lolthisistoofunny


Posts: 511
Oh, and I can tell you, no woman (unless she's a drooling imbecile) deliberately goes out and looks for a man who will "treat them badly."

What usually happens is that Prince Charming is very...well, charming, and seductive and attentive and all that wonderful stuff...AT FIRST.

It's not until later that his true colors come shining through. That, I've discovered, is true about most men. The ones I got involved with that I thought were so wonderful from the beginning? Ha! Not so wonderful once I really got to know them, and that includes my ex-husband.
post reply view lolthisistoofunny's threads
Dec 10, 2007 @ 6:39 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
Loveyoulongtime2


Posts: 446
Not this BS again! Yes, they are all nice in the beginning, at the begging to get to know you stage. The not so nice guys are more likely to meet women, they try harder. But women have to be blind not to see the real person very soon. The truth is that the nice guy is too acommodating to anything the woman wants, the yes dear syndrome. He doesn't seem have any backbone or mind of his own. Women get bored, he's not the exciting unpredictable so called bad boy.
post reply view Loveyoulongtime2's threads
Dec 11, 2007 @ 2:15 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
Natgoat


Posts: 1,479
Sure they do . .
There are just so _F E W_ of us that are still _Available_ . . !!!
post reply view Natgoat's threads
Dec 12, 2007 @ 2:41 AM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
lunanegra


Posts: 1,478
One of these articles may help,theres quite a few of them and all informative.
post reply view lunanegra's threads
Dec 12, 2007 @ 5:49 AM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
bentan


Posts: 3,444
I believe this phenomenon goes beyond gender specifics. I think people are generally drawn to others who are more assertive and seem more confident than themselves. If you exude confidence most people will view you more favorably regardless of whether you actually have the goods. Why do you think there are so many clueless Type A management turds floating around at the top and earning wildly undeserved salaries? Let's face it, presentation counts for a lot in human relations and perception.

Personally I think you should just continue to be who you are. If people can't appreciate you for who you are perhaps it's better to be single. Heck, who knows? Maybe if you show people you don't give a double damn about whether they think you're a wuss or not they will be drawn to your independence and self-confidence. Ya ... people are funny that way. But be warned it's probably bad and controversial advice from one who regularly rebels against societal norms and expectations.
post reply view bentan's threads
Dec 12, 2007 @ 12:55 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
lolthisistoofunny


Posts: 511
Interesting perspective, and I'll add my .02 to it. The ones who exude that "confidence," who later turn out to be liars, cheaters, deceivers, etc., etc., are merely lliving under a facade of confidence to begin with. They use that confidence to mask their fears, their personal insecurities. The difficulty when choosing a partner is in determing the difference between sincerity and bullshit, which is oftentimes not quite as easy as it seems.
post reply view lolthisistoofunny's threads
Dec 12, 2007 @ 5:04 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
Natgoat


Posts: 1,479
I have Plenty of fears . . and even some insecurities . .
I can only be as open and honest as I C a n . .
All I'm looking for is a Partner . . and to create
Two Less Lonely People in the World . . !!
post reply view Natgoat's threads
Dec 13, 2007 @ 1:22 AM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
bentan


Posts: 3,444
Unfortunately, by the time these confidence tricksters are exposed, the women they have hoodwinked may have become jaded and discouraged by men in general. I hate inconsiderate jerks who spoil it for everyone else.
post reply view bentan's threads
Dec 13, 2007 @ 1:52 AM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
lolthisistoofunny


Posts: 511
i agree, though I'd caution the use of the word "hoodwinked" because, as the saying goes, "hindsight is 20/20." Without evidence to the contrary, it is very hard to detect fraud UNTIL the fraud has been committed. What's discouraging is the extent to which people will lie to serve their own egotistical needs, and the fact that those kinds of people are the rule, rather than the exception and mostly because people are willing to let them get away with it. No one is held accoutable and that's why they do the things they do.
post reply view lolthisistoofunny's threads
Dec 13, 2007 @ 2:42 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
bentan


Posts: 3,444
Actually the word "hoodwinked" does not necessarily carry with it the implication of fault on the part of those of have been tricked. It just means that the said women have been successful targets of duplicity, regardless of whether they were reasonably responsible for being misled or not.
post reply view bentan's threads
Dec 13, 2007 @ 2:51 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
Natgoat


Posts: 1,479
Agreed, 'ben' . .
Don'cha'just Hate Selfish, Macho-Slob, Game-players . . ???
So many Man-Bashers have been created by them
. . and . .
just for the sake of a Gaff, too . . !!!
Kinda makes you wish that that Fault-Line would swallow them up
. . doesn't it . . ?? . .
post reply view Natgoat's threads
Dec 13, 2007 @ 2:58 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
shellsmack


Posts: 7,775
I like nice guys, but they need to be a little rough around the edges.
post reply view shellsmack's threads
Dec 13, 2007 @ 6:44 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
40yearoldvirgin


Posts: 454
I think it is more a case of women not liking boring guys. Nice guy = boring guy to lots of women.
post reply view 40yearoldvirgin's threads
Dec 13, 2007 @ 6:44 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
bentan


Posts: 3,444
Kinda makes you wish that that Fault-Line would swallow them up

The San Andreas you mean? Hey ... I live there!
post reply view bentan's threads
Dec 13, 2007 @ 8:42 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
lolthisistoofunny


Posts: 511
Actually the word "hoodwinked" does not necessarily carry with it the implication of fault on the part of those of have been tricked. It just means that the said women have been successful targets of duplicity, regardless of whether they were reasonably responsible for being misled or not.

If they were successful "targets" of duplicity, then it does carry with it the implication of fault on the part of the one being "tricked" because, according to some, anyway, she "should have seen it coming." Hence returning back to my previous comment about hindsight being 20/20.

You cannot predict human behavior, particularly in certain individuals who hide behind a facade of "goodness." Wolves in sheep clothing, as it were.

So that's where the issue of trust comes in. On the one hand, you have Mr. Good Guy who turns out to be Mr. Good Guy, and on the other you have Mr. Good Guy who is really Mr. Bad Guy in Mr. Good Guy clothing. You have to decide whether or not to "go out on a limb" and trust men (or women) when dealing with this whole relationship "game" because, as they say, "You can't win if you don't play."

post reply view lolthisistoofunny's threads
Dec 13, 2007 @ 8:54 PM Why don’t women like nice guys?    
scarletsara


Posts: 77
Some women just crave drama/excitment good or bad.
Personally I create the excitement in a relationship
post reply view scarletsara's threads
Main    Dating & Romance    Why don’t women like nice guys?

free dating | mission statement | testimonials | safety warning | report abuse | safe list | privacy | legal | 2257 | advertise | link to us

© Copyright 2000-2014 Online Singles, LLC.
OS-WEB01