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70-year-old Male
Seeking Women: 18 - 50
Calgary, Alberta
Last Activity: > 3 months ago

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The Frog Blog  
Why do frogs seem so indifferent towrds me? When they land on me, they don't even bother to give me a sideways glance. Some even use me as their own private toilet, then hop away without even a how'd ...More...
13 comments | 3 kudos | 326 views | posted Aug 20, 2008 at 9:18 AM

Magnetic Love  
I was sitting around in my closet sorting panties when suddenly a thought came to me ..Bort've heard about chick magnets ..why not fill your pockets with magnets and see if you can attract hot ...More...
14 comments | 2 kudos | 305 views | posted Aug 14, 2008 at 3:32 AM

New Panty Lab  
Well folks ...Ewe Wish has just offered her closet to me in her spare bedroom...wth my own key ..I might add....because Ash hasn't been around much. I'm going to get Max to load up the Van with my pan...More...
11 comments | 3 kudos | 294 views | posted Aug 7, 2008 at 7:29 AM

This Just In  
Ohhh..Gawd....I'm so excited that I could explode sending thousands of little dancing Borty's throughout the nation...

The olympics in China has just accep...More...
7 comments | 1 kudo | 279 views | posted Aug 6, 2008 at 3:04 AM

Socratic Pluralism  
Many of you have emailed me and asked...Bort...did you ever find your dinky after that unfortunate accident you had?

Well I happy to announce that I found my dinky vacuum wrapped in the suasage dep...More...
8 comments | 2 kudos | 251 views | posted Aug 1, 2008 at 5:42 AM

Bort's Strange Happenings  
I was reading the Quantum Mechanics blog and remembered some unexplainable things that have happened to me.

I was sitting at the dinning room table playing solatare when I looked up and saw myself ...More...
15 comments | 2 kudos | 287 views | posted Jul 26, 2008 at 3:53 AM

Bort Feels Cheap  
You know that things are not working out when making love she says...

1, Is it in yet?

2. Move your head, I can't see the TV.

3. Stop shaking the bed ..I can't read.

4. Hurry up...I've got...More...
11 comments | 1 kudo | 236 views | posted Jul 20, 2008 at 3:51 AM

Embarassing Accident  
My dinky fell off in the produce department at Safeways I just left it there on the floor...wasn't using the damn thing anyways. Hope nobody slips and falls on it ...with all this DNA tracing, t...More...
8 comments | 0 kudos | 264 views | posted Jul 15, 2008 at 6:01 AM

Bort's Reply's  
Wow....I'm sure getting some interesting replys from some of the hot chicks on this site. They were in response to my blog ..Bort's is a sample of emails...

Dear Bort...I like to go hunt...More...
7 comments | 2 kudos | 307 views | posted Jul 14, 2008 at 3:08 AM

Bort Is Hot  
I'll be in my apartment on business tonight and tomorrow night. Please get in touch with me at
8 comments | 0 kudos | 289 views | posted Jul 13, 2008 at 4:37 AM

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