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borty293
68-year-old Male
Seeking Women: 18 - 50
Calgary, Alberta
Canada
Last Activity: > 3 months ago

Aries Aries
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Edible Panty Seed Notice  
First of all, I would like to thank everyone for your birthday wishes on my sixty third year of life.

And now on to more pressing issues.

It has been brought to my attention, that many of you th...More...
6 comments | 0 kudos | 185 views | posted Mar 28, 2009 at 1:50 AM

Could Be The End  
There was an explosion at the sewage plant in Calgary today.

As many of you know, I suffer from a severe fecal phobia and am just beside myself with worry.

The Emergency Response Team advised th...More...
8 comments | 1 kudo | 210 views | posted Feb 23, 2009 at 11:48 PM

Thoughts On My Pussy  
I gotta pussy. The only time she shows any effection for me is when I rub her behind the ears. She has puffy golden fur and licks herself quit often.

Most of the time I am just a boy toy to her We ...More...
16 comments | 1 kudo | 312 views | posted Jan 11, 2009 at 1:47 PM

Bort's Come On's  
I have many rednecks in my veins and large structures to fondle your brain stem.

Many boobs have grown out of my back...not sure if I'm comming or going.

Open your radio programs and tune me in....More...
9 comments | 1 kudo | 236 views | posted Jan 9, 2009 at 9:27 AM

Laughter and Crying  
Have you noticed that laughter and crying are very similar. They both seem to result in a calming effect. I prefer laughter particularly the type that causes the eyes to bug out and large quantities o...More...
12 comments | 2 kudos | 229 views | posted Jan 6, 2009 at 10:25 AM

The Singing Worms May Be Employed  
Just finished knitting some woolen body socks for my singing worms. The City wants to hire them to serenade people at bus stops on their way to work in the mornings. We have several show tunes in our ...More...
9 comments | 1 kudo | 215 views | posted Jan 5, 2009 at 7:53 AM

Anal Sex Is The Shits  
It was frightful seeing all those cow's on meth eating people on New Years. They would have eaten me if it hadn't been for my invention...The Six Cup Bra.

No indication of their rampage on the news...More...
11 comments | 2 kudos | 274 views | posted Jan 2, 2009 at 6:29 PM

Meth Addicted Cows Eat the Homeless  
I often wonder where people have gone. Do they just walk away from their computers never to return?...or do they go to different sites and start all over again. Some just seem to fade into oblivion .....More...
10 comments | 1 kudo | 234 views | posted Dec 29, 2008 at 6:14 AM

Christmas Everyday  
I think I've figured out what this christmas thing is all about.

Somebody gives ya a bunch of stuff...then ya keep what ya need...then ya pass on the stuff to other peoples.

I try to do that all...More...
6 comments | 2 kudos | 196 views | posted Dec 26, 2008 at 3:15 PM

Urgent Request  
After reading a very alarming blog by my friend Straddle called End of Days, I felt compelled to find a solution and sprang to action in my Laboratory.

I have sown 784000 satin granny panties toget...More...
10 comments | 1 kudo | 228 views | posted Dec 23, 2008 at 3:56 AM

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