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DickSlippery
47-year-old Male
Seeking Women: 18 - 99
Carmichael, California
United States
Last Activity: 2 months ago

Virgo Virgo
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Ghetto Attitude  
I heard that blackbird sing
I hocked your wedding ring
I kicked another teenage girl up out the bed
I get my medicine on Tuesdays
And I know they're all just floozies
But I guess Id rather wrap i...More...
0 comments | 0 kudos | 199 views | posted Jul 26, 2012 at 2:32 PM

By Special Request...  
Hey did you hear
About the one that got away?
They say he looked left
She turned right
Meant to be together but not that night


Its been awhile since I posted here. Im guessing most of y...More...
4 comments | 0 kudos | 254 views | posted Jul 25, 2012 at 2:01 PM

Did this really happen?  
I had been having a dream where Alex and I were exploring some buildings or something. We ended up at what I can only describe as a cabin of some sort and we layed down on the floor in sleeping bags a...More...
4 comments | 0 kudos | 271 views | posted Jan 28, 2012 at 9:10 AM

Just getting my Whig on straight!  
So you guys know how Ive been tripping out on facebook lately, right? Well. I got to looking at my profile and I noticed that I have 138 fucking friends? How the fuck is that even possible? I d...More...
5 comments | 0 kudos | 277 views | posted Dec 6, 2011 at 4:08 AM

Another Pheasant Alley Monday  
Ive got a new favorite thing to do when Im online, and when I get done telling you all about it I have a feeling that the Yahoo hookers who keep sending me emails arent going to be very happy. But sin...More...
3 comments | 0 kudos | 302 views | posted Dec 5, 2011 at 11:04 AM

Sing Along with Dick!  
Wanna tell you about the girl I love
My she looks so fine
She's the only one that I been dreamin' of
Maybe someday she will be all mine
I wanna tell her that I love her so
I thrill with h...More...
4 comments | 2 kudos | 292 views | posted Dec 3, 2011 at 12:09 AM

THE FREAKIEST SHIT A MAN CAN HANDLE  
When he is:

10yo - “You want me to put it where?”
20yo - “You’re gonna put that where?”
30yo - “You picked him up where?”
40yo - “Thats where Im supposed to put it?”
50yo - “Why don’t I just s...More...
2 comments | 0 kudos | 288 views | posted Nov 28, 2011 at 7:56 PM

392 days and counting...  
I hope that when the Mayans were coming up with their doomsday calendar they weren't talking about some planet-ending catastrophy like an asteroid or some god-awful shit like that. Because Im not real...More...
5 comments | 0 kudos | 270 views | posted Nov 28, 2011 at 7:44 AM

Born to be Wild  
Get your motor runnin'
Head out on the highway
Looking for adventure
In whatever comes our way


My son-in-law is so pussy whipped its fucking hilarious. I mean I like getting laid as much ...More...
3 comments | 1 kudo | 280 views | posted Nov 27, 2011 at 3:19 AM

1% of what?  
Ok...Im not going to lie. I have been fucking itching to write something about this so-called occupation that has been sweeping over the nation. The problem I have been running into is I don’t ...More...
14 comments | 0 kudos | 345 views | posted Nov 27, 2011 at 1:58 AM

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