Frank and Joe were sitting a local bar when Frank starts to complain about how much trouble he gets in when he rolls in at 3 AM.
"Well, what do you do when you get home?" asks Joe.
"For starter, I coast into the driveway and park the car. I ease the door shut. I greased the locks to the house so they don't make any noise. I slip my shoes off so I can walk through the house quietly. Then I undress in the bathroom and slip quietly into bed. Every time, without fail, she wakes and starts bitching at me."
Joe says, "Maybe you should try my approach."
"What's that?"
"Well, I come screaching into the driveway. I fumble with my keys at the door, and slam it shut when I go in. I stomp through the house singing. I jump into bed with my wife, slap her on the ass and say, 'how about giving me some of that good stuff?' and amazingly, she never stirs or says a word."
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