Two old ladies were outside their nursing home, having a drink and a smoke, when it started to rain. One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette, and continued smoking.
Lady 1: What's that?
Lady 2: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.
Lady 1: Where did you get it?
Lady 2: You can get them at any pharmacist.
The next day, Lady 1 hobbles herself into the local pharmacist and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms.
The bloke, obviously embarrassed, looks at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, over 80 years of age), but very delicately asks what brand she prefers.
"Doesn't matter son, as long as it fits a Camel
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