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Farts and Blowjobs

posted 2/18/2007 3:55:27 PM |
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tagged: humor, blowjobs, straddle, oral sex
  StraddleMyNose

Late last night while Kim and I were talking we had been on the phone for about 3 hours and it coming up on 7am my time. We were both tired and getting a little silly (I get pretty silly when I get real tired) and I brought up the "what if's" game again. lol This time I asked her if she ever had a guy to acidently fart while she was giving him a blowjob. She said no she hadn't and was laughing pretty hard like me and she thought that was pretty gross. I then said to her that I think I will blog about this topic and ask if anyone has ever encountered this. Ladies, has a guy acidently farted while you were going down on him? Guys, have you ever let one out while having her going down on you? If so, what type of fart was it, was it a squeeker (the worst one because of the smell)?

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Comments:

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JDude7

Feb 18 @ 4:02PM  
I know better then to fart... There's be teeth in that there mouth!

How about the guys that have been farted on whilst tasting 'honey'?

MrED57

Feb 18 @ 4:08PM  
Yep, been there, done that, not on purpose, but sometimes, they just come out of nowhere. It was with one of my ex's and she understood, but on the other hand , i have been on the other side of it too. women also sometimes can let loose when you are going down on them.... and her's was a very bad one, we both just laughed about it, and said what a mood killer it was .....lol....
HRRRICKANE

Feb 18 @ 4:11PM  
you never cease to surprise me Stradd......
StraddleMyNose

online now!
Feb 18 @ 4:11PM  
That's also a very good question. Have any one of you ladies farted while he was going down on you? Guys, everhave your lover fart in your face while going down on her?
HollyHummy

Feb 18 @ 4:37PM  
OMG!! Straddle !!...you think of some of the wildest and off the wall things!!
Looking4ever

Feb 18 @ 5:41PM  
The questions isn't, "Were you dropped on your head as a kid?"...it's really, "How often were you dropped on your head?" Where do you come up with this craziness?
wtxman

Feb 18 @ 5:44PM  
Shawn my friend, you continue to surprise me by the depths of your depravity On another note,if Kim is into your stuff, then I think you might have found a soulmate.
ksk72

Feb 18 @ 6:08PM  
Yes he has found his soul mate.
I spend alot of time laughing at his crazy "what if " ideas. This one was pretty rude as usual and I will admit I encouraged him to share. Seems the more tired he gets the crazier he gets.
So for the sake of entertainment for all our AMD friends...
I am willing to sacrifice my own sleep to make Straddle stay up way to late so he can come up with more crazy thoughts and blogs.
Sunshinegal35

Feb 18 @ 6:35PM  
Straddle, my man, you kill me! But I could actually see this happening!
Argit01

Feb 18 @ 6:51PM  
No it has never happened to me and I would laugh if it did
IdahoHolly

Feb 18 @ 7:21PM  
No straddle it has never happened to me, I can only imagine I would bust up laughing
In the process of trying to control my laughter, my jaw would tighten and my mouth would close,
So to not leave deep teeth marks in his cock, he may want to warn me before such things happen.
Just a thought though
lintroller

Feb 18 @ 10:21PM  
This very topic was discussed in the movie Chasing Amy, where Jason Lee's character describes it happening to him. The girl, if memory serves, did not handle it with particular grace.
LadieDarkStarr

Feb 18 @ 11:07PM  
This is a LONG response... fair warnging.

I've had this happen to me with two different people. The first was truely upset by it. It was SUPER loud and he happend to let it loose RIGHT as I began to deep throat him. He was SO upset that he actually made me stop, and he left. I didn't see him again after that, ever. LoL I would have been fine with it, I actually did pretty good at not laughing... I just kinda "gaged" for a second.

The second, oh boy... I remember the first time he farted while I was going down on him. No sound, just smell. OMG this horrible rancid smell. I had just started working him and all of a sudden my nose started to burn. I swear my eyes began to water. I just ignored it and pretended like all I wanted to do was tease him. We kept going and everything was fine. Then a few days later I tried to go down on him again... and yet again he let an S.B.D. (silent but deadly) go. This little pattern continued for about a month. EVERYFUCKINGTIME I tried to suck this man's dick, he stunk the area up to Timbuktu. I finally got irritated and asked him "What the FUCK is that stink? Every God Damned time I try to suck this little cock of yours you go and shit your pants!" Probably NOT the best way to approach the situation... Apparently, whenever a girl was going to go down on him, he happend to pass gas. It was the combination of a nervous stomach (all the anticipation of whats to come) and FINALLY relaxing enough. Turns out, this guy had never had a full on blow job. Poor fella. Ah well, I don't care how much I'd have helped him out... I'm not about to pin my nose closed for THAT!

And yea, I admit... I've farted when a guy is goin down on me. Not exactly something I'm proud of. Just ONCE though... and for the entire rest of the session I was SO concentrated on "OMG what if he smelled something?! Did it make any kind of noise? I am SO embarassed" that I had to fake two orgasms as closely as possible just to get him to leave me alone. LoL

But my absolute FAVORITE fart/sex story is this:
My man (at the time) were gettin it on. It was all sorts of freaky hot monkey sex. The kind that makes your toes curl, and you get fucked stupid (where you just can't move or talk or think or ANYTHING afterward) when all of a sudden Thunder lets the loudest fart I have EVER heard come from a dog!!! It was rediculious. Well after just a little giggle, we were back into what we had in mind before. Then it hit us like a mack truck. Jeasus Christ! The stank was so bad we bailed on the entire thing... got dressed and went out for some ice cream. Laughing the entire time.
zena343

Feb 19 @ 3:07AM  
OMG LDS your stories are hiliarious, couldn't stop laughing, surprised I didn't wake my daughter in the next room .
Raven_Silverfire

Feb 20 @ 4:09AM  
nope, never had a guy fart when i went down on him, my blowjob disaster stories are a bit different. I'd probably laugh about it...after falling on the floor choking and gagging

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Farts and Blowjobs