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My Platform? Why...it's shoes! (Part Two)

posted 2/7/2007 12:35:08 AM |
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  DickSlippery

CONTINUED FROM B4 (that means don't read it if U haven't read Part One, dummy!)

Now some of U are thinking, 'But what about all those illegal drugs getting N2 the country, Dick?' Honestly...it's just something I do. There's no trick 2 it...really. I'll tell U what about those illegal drugs. The reality of it iz that 4 every one drug shipment we stop coming N2 this country, nine make it through undetected. Under my plan ten will make it through undetected. Big fucking deal. The only possible effect that can have iz 2 drive down prices on the streets, providing relief 4 some of the Americans most in need of financial relief...the dope fiends. The dope fiend iz often overlooked in America 2day, becuz he usually gets loaded and 4gets 2 fucking vote. I understand this. I feel Ur pain, dope fiends of America. Finally, someone iz here 2 listen 2 Ur cries B4 choosing 2 completely ignore them. That someone iz Dick. That someone iz me.

And that's not all, baby! Not by a long fucking shot. Cuz U know what we gonna do? We're gonna get those drugs off the streets and put them behind the counter! That's right...we're are going 2 completely renovate a broken system. Under my plan we will legalize, regulate and tax narcotics B4 providing them 2 adult Americans 2 enjoy at their leisure. I say it’s time 4 government 2 get the fuck out of our private lives. As long as U ain’t driving I don’t give a fuck! Go ahead…see what it’s like 2 eat seventy-three hits of Four-Way Window Pane. It’s Ur brain, dickhead. If U want 2 fry the motherfucker, go ahead. U better have someone willing 2 spoon feed Ur dumb ass baby food, though, cuz SSI izn't going 2 pick up the bill 4 that one, U fucking dummy! I am also in favor of annexing South America. This will bring down our cost enormously. This way we will preserve the huge profits made annually off of drugs in this country 4 the government, rather than letting it all go 2 people like that fucking bitch Carlos, who still owes me two and a half grams, I don't give a fuck what he says! Fifty bucks iz a lot of money, motherfucker! I want what's mine's and I'm about through playing with Ur ass, bitch!

Hold on, baby, I'm not finished yet! We're also going 2 do the same thing with Prostitution! We will legalize, regulate and tax all the hoing across the nation. Now, the pimps ain't gonna like this one bit. Especially right on the heels of having their drug profits taken away from them. But I never said it wuz going 2 be easy people. Nothing worth having ever iz.

Once all of my plans take effect we will be making so much fucking money it won't matter that I printed extra cash 2 give big tittied bitches a rebate. We will have mad cash! Enough 4 fucking everyone in the nation 2 get a slice of that pie. Plus...we will become, in effect, the drug dealer 4 the entire country. Just think of all the extra shit we'll have from the dope fiends who trade the shit they stole 4 drugs instead of buying them. Any fucking CD U can think of...U know someone somewhere stole a copy of it! Once we divvy all that shit up, we should all be sitting pretty, U know what I’m saying?

Trust me…when I become President we will balance that motherfucking budget! In addition 2 the ideas I have outlined here I also intend 2 make sure we stop buying shit like commodes that cost $12,000 apiece and ¾ inch galvanized pipe at $326 a foot. Again…I know this iz going 2 ruffle a few feathers. But I’m not here 2 make motherfuckers happy. I’m here 2 get laid.

VOTE WHIG BITCH!!!!

Keeping U posted,

DS

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Comments:

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PrincessKissy

Feb 7 @ 1:12AM  
VOTE WHIG BITCH!

I WANT DICK IN 2008!!


Dude? You do realize I'm one of those big tittied bitches, right? What's the rebate on an F cup, muthafucka?
DickSlippery

Feb 7 @ 1:26AM  
Whatever U want, baby! We're just printing that shit up anyway!!!

(F??? Are U fucking shitting me? So, how's those tix 2 Vegas coming, anyway?)

VOTE WHIG BITCH!!!!

DS
belle1010

Feb 7 @ 2:33AM  
What's the going rate for a DD? I want my share of the wealth!


I WANT DICK IN 2008!!!
geena

Feb 7 @ 2:49AM  
Ok, I can't read, you were talking about the drugs, all I know is "shabu" that's Meth in my country, heared about dicks...I mean weed, cough syrup or the downers. . . all right what the hell is VOTE WHIG BITCH!
wtxman

Feb 7 @ 8:27AM  
Come on guys of AMD,step up to the plate on this ! Candidate Dicl Slippery needs all of our help; not just from the "big titted women here ! PK an "F" OMG and belle a "DD" WTF !! I think I've narrowed down the list of your running mate DS. Yes to leagalizing all that shit ! Annexing South America is also a great idea,not only for the drugs; remember that dude Chavez and all the oil in Venezuela !

Remember that the "circus" can deliver you the vote in the "bible" belt; I know it sounds strange, but we have our own methods of persuasion. Also we need an address for your campiagne headquarters, so Kimmie can send you your "seed" money to jump start your efforts to "renew"America.

Vote: Whig Bitch in 2008 !

These kudos might actually start to have some "worth" when you are elected,but I'm sending one your way anyway.

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My Platform? Why...it's shoes! (Part Two)