The following isn't intended as a rigid classification. It was written by
Diane Vera and published in The Lesbian S/M Safety Manual,
edited by Pat Califia, from Lace/Alyson Press, Boston, 1988,
reissued 1990 (ISBN 1-55583-301-2)
Within the S/M subculture, different people use the words
"submissive and slave" to mean many different things. When
submissives say "I want to be your slave, " sometimes they mean
only that they want to be tied up and whipped. Many professional
dominants routinely refer to their (usually _not_ very genuinely
submissive clients) as "slaves." At the other extreme, there are
people who want to be full-time personal servants, and who truly
ant to exist solely for their Dom(me)'s use, pleasure and
convenience. And there are many shades in between these two
1. THE OUTRIGHT NON-SUBMISSIVE MASOCHIST or KINKY
Not into servitude, humiliation or giving up control; just pain and/or
spiced-up sensuality, on the masochist's own terms and for the
masochist's own direct pleasure (i.e. turned on solely/mainly by one's
own bodily sensations rather than by being "used" to gratify one's
2. PSEUDO-SUBMISSIVE NON-SLAVE
Not into even playing "slave, " but into other "submissive"
role-playing, e.g. schoolteacher scenes, infantilism, "forced"
ransvestism. Usually into humiliation, but NOT into servitude,
even in play. Dictates the scene to a large degree.
3. PSEUDO-SUBMISSIVE PLAY SLAVE
Likes to play at being a slave; likes to feel subservient; may in some
cases like to feel one is being "used" to gratify partner's sadism
may even really serve the dominant in some ways, but only on the
"slave's" own terms. Dictates the scene to a large degree; often
fetishistic (e.g. foot worshippers).
4. TRUE SUBMISSIVE NON-SLAVE
Really gives up control (only temporarily and within agreed-upon
limits), but gets her/his main satisfaction from aspects of subMission
other than serving or being used by the dominant. Usually turned on
by suspense, vulnerability, and/or giving up responsibility. Doesn't
dictate the scene except in very general terms, but still seek mainly
her/his own direct/pleasure (rather than getting one's pleasure
mainly from pleasing the dominant).
5. TRUE SUBMISSIVE PLAY SLAVE
Really gives up control (though only temporarily; only during brief
"scenes" and within limits) and gets main satisfaction from
serving/being used by dominant-but only for FUN purposes, usually
erotic. May/may not be into pain. If so, is turned on by pain
indirectly, i.e. enjoys being the object of one's partner's sadism, on
which the submissive places very few requirements or restrictions.
6. UNCOMMITTED SHORT-TERM BUT MORE THAN PLAY
Really gives up control (usually within limits); wants to serve and be
used by the dominant; wants to provide practical/non erotic as well
as fun/erotic services; but only when the "slave" is in the mood.
May even act as a full-time slave for, say, several days at a time,
but is free to quit at any time (or at the end of the agreed upon
several days). May or may not have long-term relationship with
one's Mistress, but, either way, the "slave" has the final say over
when she will serve.
7. PART-TIME CONSENSUAL-BUT REAL SLAVE
Has an ongoing commitment to an owner/slave relationship and
regards oneself as the dominant's property at all times. Wants to
obey and please dom(me) in all aspects of life-practical/non erotic
and fun/erotic. Devotes most of time to other commitments (e.g. job)
but Dom(me) has first pick of the slave's free time.
8. FULL-TIME LIVE IN CONSENSUAL SLAVE
Within no more than a few broad limits/requirements, the slave
regards herself/himself as existing solely for the Dom(me)'s
pleasure/well being. Slave in turn expects to be regarded as a prized
possession. Not much different from the situation of the traditional
housewife, except that within the S/M world the slave's position is
more likely to be fully consensual, especially of the slave is male.
Within the S/M world, a full time "slave" arrangement is entered
into with an explicit awareness of the magnitude carefully, with more
awareness of the magnitude of power that is being given up, and
hence is usually entered into much more carefully, with more
awareness of the possible dangers, and with much clearer and more
specific agreements than usually precede the traditional marriage.
9. CONSENSUAL TOTAL SLAVE WITH NO LIMITS
A common fantasy ideal which probably doesn't exist in real life
(except in authoritarian religious cults and other situations where
the "consent" is induced by brainwashing and/or social or economic
pressures, and hence isn't fully consensual). A few S/M purists will
insist that you aren't really a slave unless you're willing to do
absolutely anything for your Dom(me), with no limits at all. I've met
a few people who claimed to be no-limit slaves, but in all cases I have
reason to doubt the claim.
Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)
read more blogs!
Feb 4 @ 8:03PM
well I cant find my number..... I think they left some out ..... like the submissive, who wants to be treated with respect, cherished, the one that listens and obeys Masters wants,needs and desires,no pain please, but by no means do I want it to be only role play.......... where do I fit in yall ??
Feb 4 @ 8:23PM
Sounds like me, Maggiemae... I think the closest for us is #8.... ?
Jul 18 @ 2:45PM
I used to be a slave... no more!