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A Question about May-December Romances (in July!)

posted 7/30/2013 12:41:51 AM |
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tagged: sex, milf, youngermen
  HisMILF

When I walked into the room he was laying sprawled out on my bed, as if he was going to sleep. His right leg was bent slightly at the knee, his right forearm rested across his stomach, and his left arm was thrown across the top of his head; with his eyes closed and his breathing slow and shallow, he certainly appeared to be asleep. But I knew better. He knew as well as I did that he wouldn’t be sleeping over – that was well-established after the first time we got together. Rather, he was allowing me ample time to admire him in all his glory. Deep down, he was a closet exhibitionist. He loved being looked at…and watched. And I was more than happy to indulge him…

One would never know by the loose-fitting tee shirts and sagging pants he normally wears that he has a perfectly chiseled body, tatted up with colorful, elaborate artwork across his smooth chest and muscular back, down his shoulders and around his biceps – much less that he has a firm, round ass and more-than-ample package. Until he takes his shirt off (and especially if he’s wearing some snug-fitting boxer briefs) no one would have a clue that he’s built like a Calvin Klein model. Add to his incredible physique a smooth caramel complexion, full juicy lips, and smoldering green eyes, and it’s easy for me to say that he is, without a doubt, one of the sexiest men I have ever laid eyes on. And he’s in my bed…




I don’t understand this. I don’t understand why a sssssuper sssssexy younger man would pursue a physical relationship with a much older (and when I say much older, I mean, I have grandchildren closer to his age than I am!) woman – much less a BBW – when he could have his pick of any number of beautiful and fit women his own age…even for just sex? I don’t get it. And because I don’t get it, I’m not sure if this is a good (or smart) thing to do.

Are May-December romances a bad idea?


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J1958

Jul 30 @ 3:45PM  
Indulge yourself. Use him.

Your young man is in search of a soul-mate -- not a mate for the personality he shows the world, but a mate for his secret, hidden self-opinion, which is starving for validation. To such a young man, a woman your age, especially one a might plumpish is just about as ugly as people get. That is the way he sees himself and that is why he finds sexual correspondence in bed with you. It's how we roll.
HisMILF

Jul 30 @ 7:59PM  
J1958 - thank you for your interesting comment...er, I think! But a soul mate? Really? I am so not getting that from him! However, if by soul mate you mean "sexually compatible", you may be right. Without ever discussing sex, and certainly without any thought on my part as to what sex with him would be like, we are unbelievably in sync, sexually.

To such a young man, a woman your age, especially one a might plumpish is just about as ugly as people get. That is the way he sees himself and that is why he finds sexual correspondence in bed with you.

So, what you're saying here is I'm old, fat, and (therefore) unattractive, which is how he sees himself? If so, I can say without a doubt that you are wrong. While I don't deny that there are men out there who totally think like that, but he's not one of them. He's a cougar hunter who will probably end up with a well-off older women who will spoil him. I am not that woman.

Indulge yourself. Use him.

Indeed, I am indulging! But he uses me, which suits me fine. ;)
HisMILF

Jul 30 @ 8:00PM  
(Pls pardon my typos! LOL)
J1958

Jul 31 @ 5:05AM  
a soul mate?

Maybe, that was a poorly chosen term. The harsher he treats you, the better his purpose is served. This union of the deepest part of you both is like a soul, of sorts, and that is where the mating takes place. I just don’t know what else to call such sexual correspondence.

So, what you're saying here is I'm old, fat, and (therefore) unattractive

No, my dear. YOU’RE saying you’re old and fat – relative to him. I’m saying HE interprets that as “unattractive.” You’re also white, I assume.

No matter how much strutting and preening a black man does, in their secret heart many are still tortured by the notion that nothing can change their blackness and, by white standards, they will always be monstrously ugly.

Even the enduring myth that black men are “hung” more generously than white men is a part of this syndrome, inasmuch as he imagines he is regarded as an animal with nothing more than this to offer. You may genuinely view his body as superbly sculpted, but in his mind this is an assessment that might be made of any breeding stock.

It’s a common affliction left over from plantation days when white ladies of means used slaves as sex toys. The white ladies, perhaps ironically, were doing the same thing with the slaves he is doing with you – punishing themselves vicariously for deep-seated feelings of inferiority, probably nurtured by cruel husbands.

There is a mountain of propaganda surrounding this syndrome which seeks to enable the activity by dressing it up for consumption. But, at the end of the day, it springs from an ageless behavior best articulated in the works of Sigmund Freud. “Sex” is a teller. In the matter of sex, people always seek a reflection of the self they see beneath the misleading personality they show the world.

In the shortest terms possible, his interpretation of YOU is his interpretation of HIMSELF and that is why he seeks you…and other “cougars.” He treats you the way he thinks he deserves to be treated.

Clearly, that suits your design, which is why I say, get above it. Use him and stop worrying about the “why” of it all.

I definitely don’t mean to be cruel and I, probably, wouldn’t explain this if I knew you, but you seem to be genuinely seeking an answer to a rebus and this is my take on it, and I guess…that’s what a site like this is for.
HisMILF

Jul 31 @ 7:36AM  
Wow, J1958! Not only do you make some very wrong assumptions, but you zero in on some very racist (and telling) stereotypes that no only offend me greatly, but make you look like a complete ignorant ass(hole).

First, when did I ever say he was Black? I didn't (because he is not). I said, "a smooth caramel complexion, full juicy lips, and smoldering green eyes". That doesn't translate to Black in my book (or experience). I'm guessing you read "loose-fitting tee shirts and sagging pants he normally wears" and assumed he is Black?

And then, what makes you think I am White? I gave no description of myself (and, clearly, you have not read my profile), but if you're like most (biggoted) White people I have come across, you take my good English and writing skills to mean I am White - I get this over the phone, too. However, I also have a caramel complexion, full juicy lips, and green eyes.

For the record, both of us are Bi-racial. We are not White, we are not Black. We are Bi-racial - you know, like our President. I know that in your book that's the same as Black, but I can promise you - from personal experience - it is not.

Now, time does not permit me to fully comment on the many points you made - the dentist awaits me - but I will take the time to comment on this statement, which pretty much sums up...well, you.

No matter how much strutting and preening a black man does, in their secret heart many are still tortured by the notion that nothing can change their blackness and, by white standards, they will always be monstrously ugly.

This is by far THE most racist statement you made, showing that you feel (based on a "mountain of propaganda") that White is superior to Black. Monstrously ugly? You are, without a doubt, a huge fucking racist with an even bigger inferiority complex. You need help.

And, for the record, I have no more time for you, period.



TwistAndShout

Jul 31 @ 11:07AM  
Well said. He's a bigot, an asshole, and a self-important ignoramus.
J1958

Jul 31 @ 1:31PM  
So then, I guess the only reason you put this piece of intimacy on the site was because you wanted everyone to know you have the sexiest man alive in your bed. Interesting.

It sounded as if you were lost for an answer as to how he got there and soliciting opinions. Based on available facts you delivered, I gave you Psyche 101...right out of the Freud primer -- no brilliance or bigotry on my part.

Look again and you will see I was not delivering opinions about my own racial point of view. I was explaining what I believe motivates young black men to sleep with older plump women, which is how you described yourself.

Why all the hate-filled bile? Why all the name calling? Were you only wanting to hear opinions that propped you up in some way? Look out! Here comes an alternative you may like better.

He may be a young Apollo and you may be a bit older than he and, perhaps, somewhat full-figured, but you must be so in the Oprah fashion...so beautiful and so compelling neither he nor the rest of the universe can resist you.

Better?
J1958

Jul 31 @ 1:44PM  
Well said. He's a bigot, an asshole, and a self-important ignoramus.

C’mon, Twist…the hero worship is becoming maudlin. You are embarrassing us both. Besides...I'm not so special. Outside of Ghandi, Christ and the reigning pope, who do you know that is not "self-important"?
sugarnspice005

Jul 31 @ 3:31PM  
Maybe he doesn't like the head games, insecurities and screeching that those in his age group are capable of. He prefers the maturity of a woman who knows what she wants and doesn't have to play games. As for BBW.....just gives him more to grab onto!

And hey...if you're enjoying it, and he's enjoying it, and you both agree its mutual.....why question it?
TwistAndShout

Jul 31 @ 7:08PM  
I tend to boil decisions like this down to whether or not you're both coming from the same place. Are you more serious than he is? Is he more serious than you are? Or are you both looking at it with similar expectations?

If it's the latter, go for it. If it's not, probably better to pass it by.
J1958

Aug 1 @ 12:34AM  
I tend to boil decisions like this down to whether or not you're both coming from the same place

I don't think where you were born really matters in situations like this, and if Twist had ever been in love with a documented person, he would know that.
theSkwirl

Aug 5 @ 1:44PM  
Why ask why? If you're both happy with what you're doing, it doesn't matter the reasons. Besides.. sexy is sexy no matter how old we get.

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A Question about May-December Romances (in July!)