AddThis Social Bookmark Button
Free Dating

WHY THE LONE RANGER CAN’T CATCH A BREAK

posted 7/8/2013 3:43:51 AM |
1 kudogive kudos what's this?
    report abuse
  J1958

Oh, yes you CAN make a successful western today. How else can “Django Unchained“ be explained? So why, in an era of over-the-top comic book characters, have back-to-back blockbusters of the ultimate western super-hero failed miserably?

Clothes make the man…and the horse. That's why. Ask yourself…why would a ranger who believed powerfully in symbols and had enough money to shoot silver bullets choose to dress himself and his pony as if his tailor was a seamstress in a Navajo ghetto?

From Tom Mix to Roy Rogers, the great heroes of the mythical west who wowed kids the world over all had one thing in common – GRRRRREAT clothes. Silver-studded saddles and breast plates, bone-handled, silver-plated pistols and spurs were the eye-popping feature of all B-western heroes before Sergio Leoni’s Italian westerns resurrected the genre for a new generation. And we never went back. And the genre died, save exceptional films like “Unforgiven, “Silverado” and “Dances with Wolves.”

Every time we make a Lone Ranger film, we tell the same story used in the enormously successful TV series, starring Clayton Moore. The one thing we leave out is the wardrobe.

Admittedly, no matter how powerful chrome is, it’s just not realistic for a lawman living in the 19th century to go riding about the countryside dressed like a pimped-out rock star – UNLESS…he owns a silver mine and believes in symbolism so much that he wears a mask to scare the bad guys. Why then, would such a man dress like a beggar? Wouldn’t he want outlaws to perceive the path of justice as a prosperous alternative?

Sadly, after the 1981 Klinton Spilsbury disaster and this year’s Johnny Depp farce, we are not likely to see the ranger ride again in our lifetime. And we could pick apart each adventure, laying off the failure on Spilsbury’s lack of acting talent or Merle Haggard’s dreary narrative in the first case and Depp’s overbearing, “look-at-me, look-at-me” approach to Tonto in the second case, but the real problem they share…the real problem that stands between The Lone Ranger and mega box-office is the look of a super-hero – a look no mythical character on earth deserves more or justifies better than the masked man.

Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)

   read more blogs!

Blogs by J1958:
DREAMS OF THE EVERY-DAY RETIREE
WASTED DAYS AND WASTED SITES
HELPING GEEZERS STAY HIP
literary --THIRD TIME’S THE CHARM
AMERICAN ANTHEM 2 0 1 6
Essay – Does POT = PEACE?
Opinion – WHAT I LEARNED IN THE 5TH GRADE ABOUT PATRIOTISM
informational -- The New News
WHO’S RESPONSIBLE FOR DISRESPECT?
more satire - WHAT? YOU WANT TO USE YOUR STRAP-ON?
satire - TEN THINGS COMING IN THE NEXT 50-YEARS
WHY THE LONE RANGER CAN’T CATCH A BREAK
I’M COMING OUT OF THE CLOSET !
EGYPT; A Lesson in Sociology
I HAVE BEEN WRONG ON GAY MARRIAGE AND MUST CONFESS IT
PRIMER ON USE OF THE BRAIN
IT'S TIME SOMEONE MENTIONED...
BE GLAD YOU'RE ALREADY HERE !
THE ALL NEW ALL LIBERAL OSCARS
satire - A World Without Women


Comments:

post a comment!

TwistAndShout

Jul 8 @ 8:10AM  
Well, I suppose the sartorial theory is one way to look at it. But I'd suggest another.

The silver studded saddle, bone-handled pistol grip, rhinestone cowboy clothing and metal-bedecked horses are the hallmark of the matinee westerns that essentially died out in the 40's. For a time, they were reprised in television, with shows like The Lone Ranger, Hopalong Cassidy, etc.

That genre has been dead for decades and has never revived. Yes, you can still make a successful western, but no, you can't make one based on a premise designed for the children of the 30's, 40's and 50's. I doubt that dressing the Lone Ranger up like Clayton Moore would have made it more successful.

The current release doesn't really know what it is. It's a semi-serious-but-campy summer-blockbuster formula movie that takes a concept created for children but gives it a PG-13 rating and throws in humor supposedly aimed at adults. It appeals to nostalgia, but most of the population really has no great nostalgia for the Lone Ranger. Even an old geezer like me really only remembers reruns of the series that ended around the time I was born, and it was never a favorite of mine or most of the kids I knew.

And let me just say, J... if you put too much leather and chrome studding on the Lone Ranger, and you might just end up with The Gay Cabellero. Can mankind survive that?
theSkwirl

Jul 8 @ 8:48PM  
Sartorialism: Having to do with matters of tailoring. Not sure how that word became a descriptor for other things.
RevDocLove

Jul 12 @ 8:46AM  
Navajo ghetto?

You've obviously never been on the Rez..

The whole place is a Ghetto..With the exception of Page, Az. and it's just a slum

I'm sure Johnny Depp is still crying all the way to the bank
J1958

Jul 12 @ 2:52PM  
The whole place is a Ghetto..With the exception of Page, Az. and it's just a slum

How would a geezer living in Panama on his social security check know this?

free dating | mission statement | testimonials | safety warning | report abuse | safe list | privacy | legal | 2257 | advertise | link to us

© Copyright 2000-2014 Online Singles, LLC.
OS-WEB01
WHY THE LONE RANGER CAN’T CATCH A BREAK