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Common Courtesy

posted 6/26/2013 5:13:53 PM |
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  Lisa46

Over the past few years I've noticed that when you are invited to an event. Baby shower, wedding, birthday party or even a request for money to help with health bills. No one seems to send a thank you card anymore or even acknowledge that you did something nice for them.

Or better yet complain how poor you are in money and health yet then read about the wonderful vacation they just went on (and wondered if you helped pay for it).

What happened to people? I'm not talking about the rude people we see on here on a daily basis but the so called friends you have? I think its terrible that a person can't even say thank you.

*notice*
due to the rude comments and smart ass remarks flowing freely I will only approve comments from NON friends.

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Comments:

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sawduster

Jun 26 @ 5:38PM  
Uh, I guess I won't show up here then. But I'll put my penny's' worth in, courtesy in most forms as we knew it growing up seems to have gone by the keyboard. Instant communication has replaced talking and taking the time to write anything. And texting short cuts have replaced the need to say what you are talking about. So much is lost, will society actually survive it?
sugarnspice005

Jun 26 @ 9:48PM  
Last year, around Christmas time, my co worker and friend, a mother of 4, she and her husband were having a tough time making ends meet, it was to the point she had no food in the house for the kids, let alone herself, and because of her husbands income throughout the year, DHS wouldn't approve them for help with food. So, me and a couple of other co worker friends chipped in, and we got her food to last her family for 3 months, and basic needs things like laundry detergent, shampoo, conditioner, deodorants, etc to last them 3 months...and while she was distracted at work, one of us ran out to move her car by our cars, and he unloaded everything from the cars into hers. She was so surprised by what she saw in her car when she was leaving to go home, her exact words were: "you fuckers!!! OMG!!! What am I going to do about you guys!!!!! I love you so much!!!! Thank you!!!!!!" And she had tears in her eyes.

Some people do still say "thank you". btw...one of the friends who helped in that, is expecting her first baby in October.
TwistAndShout

Jun 27 @ 7:37AM  
In general, most people still do observe traditional courtesies. At least that's been my experience.

There have always been people who, through carelessness or laziness, neglected to send thank you cards, acknowledge favors, etc. In the past, though, I think there was more of a social stigma that attached to not following through with a thank you note or other expected courtesies. Those who aren't inclined to do so are less likely to be shamed into doing it despite themselves.

Wordsofwit

Jun 27 @ 7:38AM  
I have noticed this also and I really have no explanation as to why there has been a shift towards being self centered. Along with it, even if it comes to something as simple as a conversation, I am encountering people who have the attitude of "it's all about me." This applies not only to new acquaintances but close friends going back decades and it most certainly didn't used to be this way

What is upsetting is that in my larger, longer term social circles, the get togethers are fewer, the participants fewer, and the good times fewer. These very same people notice it also, but only as it pertains to somebody other than themselves
manwithoutahorse

Jun 27 @ 11:10AM  
I believe narcissism is the order of the day. Too many people believe they are the center of the universe. Don't get me wrong, I don't mean selfish, I mean self-centered. Many of these people would be shocked to hear someone say that about themselves. And the world of social media and the internet makes communication instant, and memories nearly as short. Not only do people not say thank you enough, they don't RSVP for ANYTHING (my personal peeve for business as well as personal reasons). And why is this all happening?

Parenting....or the lack thereof. Young people need to be taught what good manners are. I blame the parents of the offenders.
Wordsofwit

Jun 27 @ 12:30PM  
Good points^^^ but that doesn't explain why it is increasingly happening with people in our age group
soft_touch938

Jun 27 @ 1:20PM  
Well...I am guilty, guilty, GUILTY on most counts...sigh. I can't give reasons or excuses for others but I can tell you my side...for my age group.

My folks came from 'farm stock'...is that the right way to put it??? What I mean, to be blunt, they were the prime example of country hicks. Good people, but I think etiquette and manners are, well, passed down through generations. Apparently my grandparents didn't teach my parents either of these.

Not that they weren't quick to thank people for whatever...but...outside of getting gifts for, graduation, showers/weddings i.e. a specific event, we never sent thank you cards. I doubt that it ever crossed my Mom's mind to do so....she wasn't taught that so she couldn't teach us kids what she didn't know. Maybe there's a lot of families like that, it just wasn't something that they knew to do.

Now...I do tend to be self-centered...shame on me! But my world is small, not a lot of socializing. I am not interested in world events, politics or much of the local news. I am VERY aware that I don't have much to talk about but me and my mudane life BUT...I am trying hard to correct that bad habit...I do think it becomes a bad habit.

Like MWH, I think parents today don't teach their kids much of anything...it is so evident in the neighborhood kids around here. It is evident in teenagers working in a public service job...it's like they're in a fog and haven't a clue about being social or having social amenities. Kids are even rude nowadays...smart-mouthed, aloof and have big attitudes. It goes back to the parents. JMHO
manwithoutahorse

Jun 27 @ 1:42PM  
The more I think about it Bruce, for our age group it is people's "I don't give a shit" quotient.
RJ53

Jun 29 @ 2:28PM  
Good points^^^ but that doesn't explain why it is increasingly happening with people in our age group


I think some things just tend to erode over time, As people get to our age they are dealing with health problems and facing retirement and a lot of life changes, I think the all about me attitude in the baby boomers might actually be people trying to figure out where they fit into the world now,

I always say thank you to people, I used to write thank you notes until I realized an e-mail or a facebook message is faster and a lot cheaper than the postal service, I think the younger generation is rude because no one makes them be civil and requires good manners in the home, I worked in the children's department for years and a lot of those kids needed hand to ass communication,

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Common Courtesy