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Leave Your Input HERE on my "situation"

posted 12/3/2012 9:42:18 AM |
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tagged: relationships
  phimac

So why would a guy who's got a nice yet feisty sexy girlfriend prefer online porn and secret "meet-ups" to his girlfriend who is available and more than happy to accommodate every night of the week??

Maybe because I've been wayy too patient and forgiving.. each time I have proof in hand of his online activities and confront him about it, he denies it and makes up very good sounding excuses as to how I misread the info I got. Orrrrrrr, still refuses to admit what he's been up to, instead saying he's sorry for "everything" and begging me not to leave and to give him another chance...

How many chances should he get?

And what if this same behavior is what ruined his first marriage of 12 years???

He's an otherwise really great guy.... but you either want me, or you want porn.... you don't get both!

What do YOU think? All comments are appreciated! Thanks dears!

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manwithoutahorse

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Dec 3 @ 9:44AM  
An addiction is an addiction. Research sexual addictions.
sugarnspice005

Dec 3 @ 3:26PM  
Let me ask you this:

Is forgiving one too many of his secret meet-ups worth a life sentence of HIV or other STD's? All it takes is one time without protection with someone infected.

And, as MWAH pointed out, "addiction is addiction".

And now you answer this question:

What is it in YOUR life you want? You're on an adult dating site, one would assume you are "looking".
phimac

Dec 3 @ 9:21PM  
I am only on this site looking for him. I know he's got an account on here, and sooner or later he will find my page (unless I find him first) and he will not like being faced with the reality of his situation.

I have no problem with a guy looking at porn. That's his biz. My problem is the guy who claims not to be doing that (or hooking up online or in person) while also not wanting anything more to do with me than just a good friend.
Punkybrewst

Dec 4 @ 2:41AM  
This has nothing to do with an addiction, but everything to do with how you enable him.

Now if he provides you with everything you require except sex and you're content to allow him to use you because of those benefits, then by all means, stay.
If you can muster the courage to leave him and all those provisions behind, then by all means, GO.
It's perfectly obvious he's taking advantage of your complacency and the end product of complacency is danger. You, my dear, are just a convenient means to his ends which ultimately will not include you.
soft_touch938

Dec 6 @ 9:29AM  
^^^^^^ What they all said.

I'm 68 yrs. old so you may think I'm just an old fart who doesn't know crap about life the way it is now but I ain't no gray-haired old woman who's behind on the times.

What you need young lady is some self worth! You deserve better and you need to find a man who treats you with the respect you deserve.

Is this man truly what you want in your life...want as a life partner? If not then why are you wasting one minute longer with him? You say you don't mind him looking at porn...trust me, there will come a day when you mind one hellava lot.

And what is the solution to the problem if you do find him on here or he finds you? Sounds to me like it's just a quagmire of excuses to further the same old problems.

You need to RUN....not walk away from him and find a man who treats you good. All this other will not be worth it in the end. JMHO
lkb66

Dec 8 @ 9:25PM  
I have to agree with everyone here, he is never going to change and you must decide what you want, is he what you want? I agree most with soft_touch, you should run away as fast as you can and find a man who will treat you the way you deserve. I hope it all works out for you.
hot_si_man

Dec 8 @ 10:02PM  
Denial is not surprising, it's to be expected. Fear of commitment would be decent guess, based on evidence provided, and unlikely to change unless your response changes too. How long are you willing to go on?
littleboy950

Dec 10 @ 2:32PM  
omg...he must be crazy stoopid to cheat on a great lady like you...dump him asap, and then call me...ASAP!!!
RJ53

Dec 11 @ 12:15AM  
Men are like leopards. They do not change their spots, they just sometimes get better at hiding them. That goes for a lot of women as well. Not sure why you would want to be with someone you will never be able to trust but do need to ask yourself if what you are getting out of this relationship is worth it.
prevert69

Dec 14 @ 2:32PM  
HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!!!!! He wont have sex with you?????What kind of porn does he watch? any kink to it ? certen type of girls?(hair color,hight,build,) maybe he's into some kind of kink that he's ashamed or afried to share with you,most women can be VERY vanilla in sex but as ar as the rash thing go's that seems to be a faux pass on his part.
lickmaster41

Jan 16 @ 11:20AM  
Been through a similar situation. If you don't have kids together, move on and find someone else. Life is way too short. If you feel he's looking around or cheating, "in your gut" - then trust your instinct. Otherwise you'll look back in five years and wonder why you wasted your time with him. Good luck.

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Leave Your Input HERE on my "situation"