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When I was a kid

posted 11/22/2012 9:34:58 PM |
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How did that story go? Oh yeah ...It happened long ago. I like to start all my stories with a rhyme. It's got kind of a flair to it ya know. Man I'm glad I can tell stories like this. Cause the teacher when she lets me tell a story, she slaps me on the wrist 'cause I talk too much. But here it is..........

When I was 9 I got this here idea. I was gonna be the first kid in school with a TATTOO!! I thought long and hard over this decision. Just think what it would be like. I'd walk into that classroom standing ten feet high. I'd puff out my chest and look at the first punk staring at me like WHUT?! So I saved my money up, and payed a smelly greasy Italian to tattoo FTW on my forehead. FUCK THE WORLD is what it means, and I'd be so cool if I had that tattoo. So this I-talian that I spoke of began tatooing me with this homemade gun in his basement. It was dark and smelled like stale smoke and pepperoni...but I GOT IT!! FUCK THE WORLD tattooed on my forehead. I went outside eager to show off my tat, but instead of thinking it was cool people just laughed. At first I didn't know what the hell they were talking about. Instead of reading FTW it said FYM on my forehead. I found out that the smelly guy that tatooed me was dumb and dexlexic (or whatever) AND I WAS MAD!!! I went back to his basement because I wanted to kill that motehrfucker, but I found him already dead. There was a piece of sausage lodged in his throat. I got out of there quick because the scene looked fishy. But every once in awhile someone still asks me about the tattoo. On bad days When I'm in the mood to fight I just say it means FUCK YOUR MOTHER!

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When I was a kid