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Cool Saturday

posted 8/18/2012 11:59:05 PM |
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  karma2

Today reminded me of a fall day, it felt more like late Sept. than Aug. Something about it was playing tricks on my mood and I just had this hankerin' to turn back the hands of time. There's this little bar on a side street downtown called Mill St. Tap, not a dive but not fancy either by a long shot. Many years ago, I was a regular and still drop in occasionally but it has been probably a year now since I held down a barstool in the cool of the dim lights.

I made myself presentable but when I stepped out my back door, I didn't realize it was so chilly in the shade of my big oak trees, so I unlocked my door, went to my closet and opted to change into a warmer hoodie with a tank underneath.

I even felt like a drink or two so driving wasn't an option. Instead, I followed the creek that runs through my backyard down to the Dawson's on the corner where they have this quaint little bridge spanning the creek that connects with a sidewalk at the back of their property, built just for those in our neighborhood to use. It leads to Moss St. which, if you turn right, you're on your way downtown...about 3 blocks worth...well it IS a little town, after all...lol

I could tell you about the lovely walk and how cool it was under the trees or how the water in the creek sang as it made its way to the St. Joe river but time's a'wastin' and my eyes are heavy with sleepiness..

So anyway, I get to The Tap (as we call it) and at first, although feeling giddy, I also am reluctant to go through the door. You know how everyone turns to stare when someone comes through a bar door and it's no different at The Tap. But I take a deep breath and forge ahead.

I haven't been there in ages but it still looks the same...and pretty much like any little bar in any little town. I pause long enough to find a barstool that sits alone and preferrably around the curve in the bar. I don't like anyone sitting next to me and I like being where I can see the whole bar scene. Fortunately, there was only maybe a dozen people there so I got the stool I wanted.

Again, I could describe the scene before my eyes...the way the bar looked and the patrons themselves but that only drags this out. I did order a strawberry daiquiri and settled in to watch the people, that's me, a people watcher. But I hadn't been there ten minutes until the backdoor opened and in walked Ben.

Ben was an old boyfriend from about 2 years ago. A handsome man and although I don't scare little kids, I never thought he'd give me a second look. Yeah, it did stroke my ego when he began to flirt with me and I realized he was serious. I'm not the hottest chick in town...not even the warmest one...ok, ok...average is what I am. I may still wear the same size jeans as I did when I graduated high school and 10 is a good size. But I've never bothered coloring my hair which now has a white streak across my bangs and salt 'n peppered in the fringe that frames my face.

My face...not bad at all, but if I said I didn't have a few wrinkles, I'd be lying. I'll skip the rest. Let's just say I'm no spring chicken anymore and I make no attempt at hiding it.

But still, Ben pursued me and I was flattered...a LOT flattered. I knew very little about him which proved to be my downfall. I want to say I didn't know he drank until one day I saw him sober but that isn't true. He could tie one on with the best of them and I knew he drank often...I just didn't know how much.

He was fun for awhile...about 4 months. Then he was more of a job than a lover. I got tired of dragging his ass home, undressing him and pouring him into bed. You think hours of making love is fun? Excuse me! Try it with a drunk. You haven't had a sore twat until you've been banged for hours with a dick that refuses to empty its load...and a drunk that will not surrender to failure!

I began to have to cover up bruises where he'd manhandle me...flip me this way, push me that way. I think I sometimes had ear marks on my inner thighs from being folded up like a soft taco shell. I finally stopped the oral altogether...both ways. A drunk can put a whole new meaning to eating pussy! Chewing is totally banned in that tender area!

After having my throat reamed by full bodied thrusts over and over again, I threatened to sever it completely if he ever brought it close to my mouth again! Drunken sot that he was, that did get his attention and he never forgot it...

By the end of 6 months, I was seriously questioning my intelligence. I wasn't THAT hard up to deal with his sorry ass so I dumped him cold. I hadn't a clue what happened to him after that. It may be a small town but some people, I guess, just aren't worth the effort to gossip about.

So I'm sitting there sippin' my daiquiri with my brain racing about whether I can be civil to him if he sees me and wants to talk to me. I needn't have worried. Well, at least about what to say. I DID need to worry about choking on my drink when I saw who was with him. I mean, choking on laughter.

Continued in comments...

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karma2

Aug 18 @ 11:59PM  
If you've ever seen a Walmart woman, she would top the list! She had to weigh 350 pounds! I'm not kidding! Her capri jeans had raggety holes in the legs like teenagers wear and one just below her butt cheek (you could hardly see it) and they were tight as skin. Her sandals wound around her huge calves up to tie at her knees.

She had on a 'T' strap tank top that barely met the top of her jeans that let her pink belly roll show everytime she lifted her massive arms. To top it off, it was trimmed in fringe! Oh...and no bra...

Her hair was a home bleach job and was rusty orange-ish and piled high on her head. Her makeup was garish...extreme eyeshadow, rouge and bright red lipstick that bled onto her teeth.

I'd heard about her but had never had the pleasure (???) of seeing her and now my eyes felt like they were bleeding at the sight before me. And oh how she hung on Ben like he was the best treasure in the whole world and I'm sure she thought that was true. The show that she put on for everyone was downright embarrassing.

But it wasn't to be my lucky day...Ben spotted me and headed my way. I wanted to run for dear life but that was the coward's way out. No, I'd tough it out. Ben hardly said hello when Wally woman was right behind him...and she wasn't happy. Did I mention she stood a good head taller than Ben? Well she did. She looked hungry and I was sure I was on her menu!

Ben reluctantly introduced us and she waddled her way in between us. That would've been good except this huge cloud of cheap perfume engulfed me and brought tears to my eyes. Through gritted teeth, she about "honey-ed" me to death...Honey this and Honey that. But her eyes were like fire and I was pretty sure I was the fodder.

Ben tried to pull her away from me but that wasn't gonna happen anytime soon so he ordered a beer with a whiskey chaser and crawled his cowardly ass up on a barstool...a few stools away.

Now Bigfoot is in my face being as sweet as sugar. We conversed briefly, but everything she said was veiled with possible mayhem if I dared look at Ben. I just kept smiling as I edged closer to getting off my barstool.

Well, God bless the bartender. I'd heard the phone ring but didn't think anything about it. Then I heard my name called and I was wanted on the phone. No one knew where I was so I figured I'd heard wrong. The bartender had to come up and tap me on the arm to tell me I had a phone call so I excused myself and was grateful the phone was halfway down the bar.

I answered it and had to chuckle when I heard the bartender ask, "I think you needed rescued? Cell phones are great things aren't they? Come in pretty handy sometimes. You can tell Bertha Butt that you have an emergency and have to leave...how's that?" I coulda kissed him!

As I headed for the door, Bigfoot thought I was headed for Ben and she was coming at me like a Mac truck. I stopped just a few feet past Ben and she was guarding him like the Great Wall that she was so I thought I'd have a little fun with the wimpy jerk so just before I went out the door, I turned and said, "Oh Ben...I'd appreciate it if you'd stop calling me every day. I've told you over and over again that I'm not interested in your drunken ass so leave me alone!"

The last I saw was Bigfoot turning...like a slow motion picture...towards Ben and her rouge disappeared behind her beet red face and I swear I saw her orange hair go up in flames! Ben's eyes turned big as saucers as he slid off his barstool and began to back up, sputtering incoherently. Bertha Butt was bearing down on him with murder in her eyes.



I laughed all the way home. It was indeed a beautiful day. I wouldn't go back to The Tap for a very long time...if ever. I decided if I wanted to turn back the hands of time, I'd just read an old book of times gone by. Probably a lot healthier for me...and Ben.

Now the sun has set many hours ago, it's late and the telling of my day has served to mellow me out and I think I can sleep now.

Nite
K2
Wordsofwit

Aug 23 @ 9:13AM  
We had July and August in April and May. Now it has cooled off and we are getting October in August.

As for the orca at Wally World there is a site that is riot to visit called the people of WalMart. People post pics of some of the odd and peculiar life forms that can be found there.
sugarnspice005

Aug 23 @ 9:44AM  
That was a good read! Leaving a kudo for ya!

August has been a comfortable month so far. Next few days are going to be warmer again, almost 90, but we will be cooling back down to low 80's. I'm looking forward to the fall weather. I love the crisp mornings. Not looking forward to winter though. Gotta feeling that Michigan is in for a "catch up" from the mild winter we enjoyed last year.

karma2

Aug 23 @ 11:49PM  
It's amazing WoW how many Wally world people are in small towns. I guess I have seen Della before but it was from a distance and I don't think she was all dolled up. I can tell you, she sure was a shock for these eyes! But I have to chuckle every time I think of the look on Ben's face just before I walked out that door.

And yes, our weather is just plain screwy anymore. Like Sugar, a couple of days for us here too, in the 90's then another cool off. That's ok I guess 'cept I made a big pot of vegetable soup for the chilly nights and now it's gonna get hot again. Guess I'll freeze what's left of it 'til the next cooldown.

Yeah Sugar, I dread winter but I'm excited about the coming fall season, my favorite also. I, too, have to wonder what winter holds in store for us this year. At least I don't have to work so I don't have to drive in it.

Thanks u 2 for commenting...appreciate it.

K2

karma2

Aug 23 @ 11:50PM  
Oh...Sugar....thanks for the kudo...

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Cool Saturday