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Simple Truths

posted 6/13/2012 8:11:22 AM |
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  hog77297




SIMPLE TRUTH - 1



Partners help each other undress before sex.

However after sex, they always dress on their own.

Moral of the story: In life, no one helps you once you're screwed.











SIMPLE TRUTH - 2







When a lady is pregnant, all her friends touch the stomach and saying "congrats".

But, none of them come and touch the man's penis and say "Good job".

Moral of the story: "Hard work is never appreciated."










No Underwear - Makes Sense to Me



A man came to visit his grandparents, and he noticed his grandfather sitting on the porch in the rocking chair wearing only a shirt, with nothing on from the waist down.

"Grandpa, what are you doing? Your weenie is out in the wind for everyone to see!" he exclaimed.

The old man looked off in the distance without answering.

"Grandpa, what are you doing sitting out here with nothing on below the waist?" he asked again.

The old man slowly looked at him and said, "Well....last week I sat out here with no shirt on and I got a stiff neck. This is your grandma's idea."












FIVE RULES TO REMEMBER IN LIFE



1. Money can not buy happiness, but it's more comfortable to cry in a Corvette than on a bicycle.

2. Forgive your enemy, but remember the ass-hole's name.

3. If you help someone when they're in trouble, they will remember you when they're in trouble again.

4. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.

5. Alcohol does not solve any problems, but then neither does milk.




THERE YOU HAVE IT...and remember, life is good.


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   read more blogs!

Blogs by hog77297:
THE SPOON !!
Old Dogs
Men? [ One for the ladys]
LIFE
last night!
Simple Truths
The Hot Air Balloon
PRICELESS
Now you know
Harry & Nancy


Comments:

post a comment!

onehrnytoad69

Jun 13 @ 8:35AM  
Good ones!!!!
soft_touch938

Jun 13 @ 10:31AM  
Thanks for the morning laugh...good way to start my busy day...
pinklipstick2

Jun 13 @ 3:31PM  
sugarnspice005

Jun 13 @ 5:59PM  
"Grandpa, what are you doing? Your weenie is out in the wind for everyone to see!" he exclaimed.

"weenie" I haven't heard that one in years.
StraddleMyNose

Jun 13 @ 7:35PM  

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Simple Truths