1: your houseplants are alive and you can't smoke any of them
I've got an aloe vera plant, and those are HARD to kill. Believe me, my dogs have tried.
2: you keep more food than beer in the fridge
Actually, cleaning hotel rooms had an advantage. Free beer! If it wasn't opened, I brought it home. Got a mini bar in my fridge. The beer outnumbers the food.
3: you go to the drugstore for ibuprofen and antacids instead of condoms and pregnancy tests
Oh damn! Got me on that one. Yep....ibuprofen's it is.
4: "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never gonna drink again"
I'm still on the, "I just can't drink the way I used to".
Ha!!! I found only 1 that applies!!!!