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Lovemaking Tips For Seniors

posted 10/20/2011 2:09:53 PM |
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Please note---I am not implying anything by sending this to you. Just
some thoughts for you to consider as you reach middle age.

Lovemaking Tips For Seniors**

1. Wear your glasses to make sure your partner is actually in the bed.
2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.
3. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!)
4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin.
5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember..
6. Use extra polygrip so your teeth don't end up under the bed.
7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act..
8. Make all the noise you want....the neighbors are deaf, too.
9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news!!
10. Don't even think about trying it twice.** **.. . . . . . . . . . . .

**'OLD' IS WHEN...**
**Your sweetie says, 'Let's go upstairs and make love,' and you answer,
'Pick one; I can't do both!'

'OLD' IS WHEN...**
Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're

'OLD' IS WHEN...**
*Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

'OLD' IS WHEN....**
You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to
go along.

'OLD' IS WHEN...**
*You are cautioned to slow down by the** **doctor instead of by the

'Getting a little action' means you don't need to take a laxative that

'OLD' IS WHEN....**
Getting lucky' means you find your car in the parking lot..
'OLD' IS WHEN...**
An 'all nighter' means not getting up to use the bathroom.

'OLD' IS WHEN....**
*You're not sure if these are facts or jokes.**

(I sent this in large type so you can read it)*

Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)

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post a comment!


Oct 22 @ 12:27AM  
GOD...none of them are jokes

Oct 27 @ 11:48AM  
How true these are

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Lovemaking Tips For Seniors