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36 Things You Will Never Hear

posted 5/3/2011 8:46:24 AM |
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  RevDocLove


a REDNECK Say...

1. "I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex"

2. "Duct tape won't fix that."

3. "Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken."

4. "We don't keep firearms in this house."

5. "You can't feed that to the dog."

6. "I thought Graceland was tacky."

7. "No kids in the back of the pickup...
it's not safe."

8. "Professional wrasslin's fake."

9. "Honey, did you mail that donation to
Greenpeace?"

10. "We're vegetarians."

11. "Do you think my hair is too big?"

12. "I'll have grapefruit instead of biscuits
and gravy."

13. "Honey, these bonsai trees need watering."

14. "I don't understand the appeal of NASCAR."

15. "Give me the small bag of pork rinds."

16. "Deer heads detract from the decor."

17. "Spitting is such a nasty habit."

18. "I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart
today."

19. "Trim the fat off that steak."

20. "Cappuccino tastes better than espresso."

21. "The tires on that truck are too big."

22. "I'll have the arugula and radicchio salad."

23. "I've got it all on a CD."

24. "Unsweetened tea tastes better."

25. "Would you like your fish poached or
broiled?"

26. "My fiance is registered at Tiffany's."

27. "I've got two cases of Zima for the Super
Bowl."

28. "She's too old to be wearing that bikini."

29. "Does the salad bar have bean sprouts?"

30. "Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that
we haven't seen."

31. "I don't have a favorite college football
team."

32. "Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the
side."

33. "I believe you cooked those green beans too
long."

34. "Those shorts ought to be a little longer,
Darla."

35. "Elvis who?"

36. "Checkmate."

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Comments:

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Wordsofwit

May 3 @ 9:08AM  
27. "I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl."

Zima has not been produced in the US since 2008. However, if you can find your way to Japan you can git 'er dun as they still make Zima there.

sugarnspice005

May 3 @ 12:11PM  
Well, they don't say much then do they?
1bunny629

May 3 @ 1:10PM  
37. When did The Mullet come back in fashion?
Wordsofwit

May 3 @ 2:54PM  
37. When did The Mullet come back in fashion?

When Zima was sold in the US.
hog77297

May 3 @ 9:11PM  
Ya'll just have to keep making fun of my folk don't Ya!
DangerousCurves999

May 3 @ 10:18PM  
Ya'll just have to keep making fun of my folk don't Ya!

Can't help it Hog .. sorry. My new neighbor is from Alabama and has quite a drawl... well he has some doves and the names of two of them are Cracker and Honky. I about peed my pants laughing when he told me.
justme4u

May 4 @ 12:15AM  
1bunny629

May 4 @ 1:04AM  
There are some deep down and truly southern peole that come to my bar and I seriously can't make out what the hell they are saying...I have to put on my southern ears just to figure out their drink order....oh...and the ears come in many sizes.....

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36 Things You Will Never Hear