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Notches on the headboard....

posted 1/17/2007 8:51:20 AM |
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  dulsinea

What is the best sex?

(Just tryin to make you happy with the topic Sxze!!)

I don't like one night stands. Not saying that I haven't let one or two suffice in a pinch, but they are really not for me.

The best sex, for me, are the friendships or relationships I have formed that have lasted a long time. The best sex is when you know what makes him moan....or gasp...or sigh....and when you know him well enough to know to change direction at a certain moment to prolong the experience. And if you do that at the last moment...you can make him "ache" in a most delightful way....

It takes time to develop this. It takes sensual nights where you take your time and you "listen" and "sense" his reaction. Where you move a certain way when he is inside you, or where you use your hands or your mouth in just the right way...and he is sighing...his eyes are half shut...he is clutching the bed sheet...or my hair....

And the right man....the caring man...will spend the time learning the same about me.

It can't be done in a one night stand.

And I don't want to be just another notch on the headboard....

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Comments:

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zena343

Jan 17 @ 8:56AM  
your right dulsinea, being in a relationship and knowing that you care for someone as much as they care for you, makes it that much more satisfying and sensual, great blog, kudos to ya

Zena
Argit01

Jan 17 @ 9:06AM  
I totally agree with you Dulsinea, sex is better when you know the person and another kudo too.
uwant2b84fum

Jan 17 @ 9:20AM  
It helps a lot when you know what the person likes, but it is also fun to find new ways to please your woman.
JJN4Fun

Jan 17 @ 9:26AM  
Aw, for me???


I have to agree, the sex often (not always!) gets better with the same person over time. But I've also found that when an attraction is so strong - and mutual - the anticipation of the first time with that person alone can make for some very hot, very passionate, very good sex...and especially if you've taken time to talk about it - likes, dislikes, curiosities... *sly grin* Gives us all something to look forward to in meeting someone here!

BigGreyWolf347

Jan 17 @ 9:26AM  
You are so right Dulsinea
str8ngr84u2

Jan 17 @ 10:43AM  
I agree with both dulsinea and sxze. There is something to be said for that lasting built up relationship sex, but the first time, sexually frustrated, built up sex can be hot as hell too!
veeruinus

Jan 17 @ 11:03AM  
So very true...Its not only you getting the pleasure its also about the bond 2 people have and their crave to satisfy each others needs.
NightOfOld

Jan 17 @ 11:52AM  
Iliked all of the answers to this as well as the post. You areso right dulsinea.
dulsinea

Jan 17 @ 12:32PM  
Well! Some good replies so far and guys that actually agree with me! There is still hope!

And Sxze....you're right too. The only problem I find with that is that if it's somebody you've been attracted to, and lusting after and can't wait to be with....a one night stand isn't enough!

What's a gal to do???!!!
JJN4Fun

Jan 17 @ 12:54PM  
What's a gal to do???!!!

The only thing she can: hold him captive for 2 days and make him your sex toy. As if he'd complain...Then it's not a one-night-stand!
gamesman

Jan 17 @ 5:31PM  
I like the way you think.
ross007

Jan 17 @ 7:25PM  
well I can agree with some of that,and str8angr8 I totally agree with you,all the built up,with some one new,wild hot sex..........its great.............
oohwa

Jan 17 @ 7:54PM  
the best sex i ever had was with a long time friend. It just happened one time and we stayed just as close afterward. I think knowing someone and having some history between you is very important. That being said, i have had 2 one-night stands and they were great, just not as good
asexpartnerwanted

Jan 18 @ 5:51AM  
agreed
Rikosound

Jan 18 @ 12:37PM  
Okay I will be the devil's advocate here. When I was in my second year of psychology in college, that very subject was addressed. Women have a different perspective on sex obviously than men. Women need to feel some sort of connection to her partner and develop a relationship of sorts to enjoy sex with someone! Men just need a woman! Women enjoy romance and cuddling. Men just need a woman! Women also have warm feelings about her partner when (post Sex) her partner cuddles up and snuggles before either retiring or whatever. Men just need a woman! Men by nature do not need to have romance or love or emotions to enjoy sex! A males job biologically is to be a baby maker! The woman is the nurturer and the emotional caregiver. However, men today have more depth than previous in that like myself ladies! I enjoy romance and cuddling and extensive kissing but I will admit I do not neccessarily seek this out if given a opportunity for a one night stand! Then it is raw sex with a lot of the same things and actions and I will stop babbling now!
babyruth269

Feb 7 @ 10:49AM  
women give sex to get love
Men give love to get sex
locdwn

Mar 31 @ 1:47AM  
If your going to do something right you always have to take your time. I love it when a woman wants to please me, but I feel that I have to please my partner before/ with for play. It makes things better if you parner has had 3 or 4 OMG'S Before you make love.
TheAvenger

Mar 31 @ 2:11AM  
I really have to disagree with the "men just need a woman" comment. I know on the surface that's what men say ...and I have been wracking my brain for years trying to figure out how men, who are also presumably HUMAN, could completely lack the ability to have, feel and express emotion. We know this not to be the case, because they can certainly express emotion, particularly anger, at other times. And we know men are capable of love ...otherwise, why would they ever get married???

I think the answer is many men are reluctant to get intimately involved because they are terrified of being hurt, particularly if they've been hurt before. So they deny that part of their humanness. Also, since so many men are self-serving, egotistical jerks, many of them are incapable of relating the sexual experience from a viewpoint that goes beyond their genitals and the pleasure derived from ejaculation.

Also, men are taught by society to be "whoremongers," by and large, to not cry, not love, not feel emotion, and are conditioned by their peers and by porn and the sex "entertainment" industry that women are objects to be used and taken advantage of, and not human beings who are worthy of love, respect and devotion.

I've had several experiences over my lifetime with men whom I could tell had feelings for me, but the potential long-term relationship was ruined because of his fear of intimacy and fear of being hurt. Naturally, he never admitted that ...to do so would be to admit the vulnerability that he, as a MAN, is "not allowed" to have.

I've had a number of them come back later saying they regretted losing me and not realizing "what they had when they had it."

"Desperado, why don't you come to your senses?....

"You'd better let somebody love you...before it's too late."


Oh..the best sex is definitely sex with someone you have a bond with..no ifs, ands or buts. For me, the best sex is sex with a man I know I can completely trust, one whom I know is monogamous, and one whom I know I can trust to keep me safe, one I know I can confide in, etc. Doesn't necessarily have to be in a traditional committed relationship...I mean, just because the band may be on your finger doesn't mean the promises behind that ring are being kept. So I'm just talking about someone with whom you've developed a mutual trust and respect, if nothing else.

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Notches on the headboard....