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Dearly Beloved; Farewell to Chuck, our Night of Old.

posted 3/25/2011 11:47:32 AM |
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  theSkwirl

Today, we are gathered in our distant parts of the world to say goodbye and godspeed to a much beloved friend. Chuck, Night of Old, has passed on to greener pastures.

A death in the family leaves a void that cannot be filled. No one can ever take the place of this individual in the world. We should not try to comfort the family by saying that "it was his time anyway", or, "he was suffering". These may be words of comfort later. However, there must be time to mourn the fact that things will never be the same. One minute he was here and now he is gone. The human mind must be allowed to sit with this reality. Mourning is a necessary part of the human experience. If it is ignored, a general feeling of sadness may pervade the whole family.

We truly are a family. And our loss is great. There aren't many people in this world like Chuck. He was loved by all who encountered him. His generosity of spirit and with his worldly goods is astounding to those who knew.

Chuck never wanted anyone to know how miserably ill he was, so he told very few and swore us to silence. He wanted people to enjoy him and not feel sorry for him.. to that end, I post this poem in his memory.

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glint on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you wake in the morning hush,
I am the swift, uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft starlight at night.
Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there, I did not die!

Mary Frye (1932)

Instead of only grieving, though grieve we will.. let's post a joyful memory of Chuck.. a way in which he touched each of us.

(anyone who gets shitty on this blog will be edited, deleted and mentally lashed to a post and burned)

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   read more blogs!

Blogs by theSkwirl:
Arright you Fuckers... I'm Back..
Whine and Philosphize.
It's Been a While ...
Mondays... you never know what a Skwirl might do...
Idiots, Idioms and Idiosyncrasies.
Dearly Beloved; Farewell to Chuck, our Night of Old.
In Like a Lion
Another story.. good times.
What kind of Vert are you?
A very insightful poem


Comments:

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Ewe_Wish

Mar 25 @ 12:05PM  
Sam, Thank you so very much in letting me know that you had posted this blog.............I remember when I thought just about everyone on this site had turned against me and Chuck continued to stand by my side as a friend. It was never in him to judge others and once you were his friend.....You were always his friend..........and he made it very apparent that he didn't choose sides if two of his friends were fighting.

I know that the last time we talked he had been in a lot of pain.....and although he is now relieved of that pain..........I find it sad that he waited so long in life to find a woman to love him and for him to love and their time together was so short.

RIP dear man........of gentle ways and kindness in your heart.............You were my friend and a friend to me...........and I shall always miss you.
theSkwirl

Mar 25 @ 12:19PM  
Night was such a wonderful creature. Always there with a kind word, always willing to help a friend, and everyone was his friend.

I don't know how many people know this, but Chuck spent a lot of his time doing things for others. He'd host a meal, he'd donate to food banks, toy drives whatever he could.

I think that my favorite memory though .. is talking with him on the phone. He was exactly the same loving person on the phone as he was here online.

somnium

Mar 25 @ 12:35PM  
I'm at a loss of words at the moment! I'm just glad I had a chance to call Chuck my friend in an email from AMD announcing a comment he made in one of my blogs! I knew he was having medical problems, I just didn't know how sever they were!

Chuck did have a positive impact on AMD and made a lot of friends, that I know! I also know that he will be missed by all that had a chance to read his blogs and receive friendly emails from him!

I'm going to miss you Chuck, my friend!


Wordsofwit

Mar 25 @ 12:41PM  
Below is the bulletin that his lady briefly posted last night about his passing:

My name is Pam. I have been with Chuck for the last two years. I am here to fullfill a promise to him. Never in my life have i met a sweeter more giving man. Always helping anyone & every one, in any way he could. When i first met him, i couldn't beleive he was for real. But he was. He always talked about his friends on this site. And made me promiss if anything happened to him, i would let someone on here know. He has spent the last few years in more pain then you could imagin. But always tried not to let it show.,And it certainly did not stop him from helping others.
With all the pain he was in,....he still wrote me the most beautiful poetry. A new one every day. Chuck passed away the other day. His heart gave out. A big heart it was too. His two sons had his body flown home to be burried beside his Mother and father, So i guess the services will be held there. Please do not call here as i will be leaving to go there myself. He said one of his friends here had asked that his profile be left so it will remain on this site. He wanted every one to know he loved them & thank them for there friendship. I guess his pain has finally ended.
ynot7769

Mar 25 @ 1:03PM  
farewell to a good friend and a good man...so few out there...
RevDocLove

Mar 25 @ 1:14PM  
My heart is sad today...RIP old friend
Thanks for letting us know Skwirl..
Lisa46

Mar 25 @ 1:31PM  
I am heartbroken. Chuck fwas always here, with a willing pen to make us smile. I am so sorry you left us Chuck God Bless you and you will be greatly missed.
1bunny629

Mar 25 @ 1:37PM  
Thank you Skwirl for a hearfelt poem you so dearly wrote to show your gratitude and to expose it to us. I loved him dearly and knew the pain. We used to write ot one another frequently and his poetry saved my heart. I will never forget how he was more of a loving human being than any I have ever had the honor to know.

This is a very personal poem to me from Chuck in 2008. We were very close then, but remand friends .

If there's one face I want to see,
so beautiful, so true,
one smile that makes a difference,
to everything I do.

If there's one touch I long to feel,
one voice I long to hear,
whenever I am happy,
or just needing someone near.

If there's one joy, one love,
from which I never want to part,
it's you, my very special love,
my world, my life, my heart.

I saved all his poetry to me and some he wrote for all, and I saved every email he sent. I knew someday it would be my safety net when I had nothing at all. He was a true gentleman. a man's man, a womans friend and confidant, and God's disciple for all.




Wordsofwit

Mar 25 @ 1:49PM  
I was fortunate so as to be blessed to be his friend. I had the privilege and the honor of knowing Chuck largely through private emails and telephone conversations. These were far more revealing than the AMD persona he presented. He was a man of selfless giving, generosity, warmth, compassion, and humility. He was all about being positive through his living not talking about it, and, certainly without taking any credit for it.

For all the good that he did for people, he shied away from revealing to others publicly. He very much strived to be an anonymous Good Samaritan. He touched many lives and they were all better for him being in them.

Similarly, he went through extreme hardship and pain, emotionally and physically, over the last two years. Three, maybe four, of his mostly younger siblings died, leaving him as the sole survivor. Since the holidays he had four episodes involving his heart that led him to expect imminent death before he came to pass. Again, he chose to say little about it publicly, electing to only share with a few so as to not bring others down or for them to become upset. He did not want to have any form of negative impact upon the lives of others. Consequently, he hid the reality of his health from AMD at large and lived many months longer than he anticipated.

He did not like to talk about himself too much, especially in his giving to others. Every year, particularly during the holidays, he hosted several large meals for the less fortunate. In addition, he gave away dozens of hams and turkeys as well to the churches and food banks that helped them. Much of this was done without fanfare and anonymously.

To AMD, especially the ladies, he was a knight, a chivalrous knight. Through his unmatched talent for melding and blending prose in rhyme through the soul, he was able to comfort and ease the pain of their hearts. His writing transformed tears into joy, frowns into smiles, while alleviating loneliness in isolation. Every woman who read his words was buoyed, knowing that there was at least one good man in her world. This was his gift that few men, if any, are blessed with to give.

And give he did, unfailingly. In so doing, their lives were enhanced in a way no other could accomplish.

RJ53

Mar 25 @ 1:57PM  
He is is a sweet spirit that will be missed by all but is not really gone as long as he is remembered by those who knew him.
girlcountry

Mar 25 @ 2:07PM  
Chuck was my friend, unconditionally. He uplifted me more than once and I will miss him terribly.

Rest in peace, my friend and may God be smiling upon you right now.

I love you.....
soft_touch938

Mar 25 @ 2:11PM  
I'd known for some time that Chuck was gravely ill. He had so many close calls but I believe he drew strength from his many friends and he had many here in AMD.

Back in '08 we shared some very special e-mail and it was one of those times when he felt at that moment that his time was limited so I wrote him the following poem that at the time was for his eyes only...now I share it with those who loved him as dearly as I did. We were two poets who understood one another's need to set words to rhyme and that those words most always came straight from our hearts.

A Poem to Chuck (AMD)

Life is full of pathways ,
Making friends along the way.
Woven in our heartstrings,
Memories that stay.

We always know our day will come,
Just when we cannot know,
So through the years we travel,
And seeds of friendship sow.

Friends are for a season,
Some stay while others go.
They're there for a reason,
To help us learn and grow.

Some friends are so special,
With hearts that's made of gold.
With wisdom of the ages,
Shared in stories told.

You my friend are one of those
Whose heartstrings intertwined
Within this small community
You're one of a kind.

The legacy you leave my friend
One so rare tis true...
Kindness, love and thoughtfulness
All of those are you.

You will be remembered
In hearts you've touched my friend,
We'll miss you when the season's gone,
But memories of our Chuck will never end.

With Love,
Softie
(TO MY FRIEND CHUCK IN AMD WRITTEN IN SEPT. 08)

God speed my friend...until we meet again.
theSkwirl

Mar 25 @ 2:37PM  
From former Pervians:

DKW and BlueEyes: I am sorry to hear this sis. He wrote lovely poetry and he was a dear person to all of us

DMBgirl: Oh no!! Thanks for passing along the news, Sam. How sad :-(

LunaNegra: Wow. RIP, really- he was one of the good ones..just damn. I hope it was a peaceful transition.

Looking4now: That is sad news indeed...

Needsomenow/Melli: ?:( I remember knight.... great guy. sad news, truly. *hugs*

Alybi: Sorry to hear that. He was such a nice man that got along with everyone..

Chuck's legacy of love, lives on in all of us.
StraddleMyNose

Mar 25 @ 2:54PM  
I just got the sad news
JsGirl69

Mar 25 @ 3:00PM  
Thank you,Dearest Skwirl,for passing this news my way....
The world feels a bit emptier for me,knowing he's no longer in it.I had only known NightofOld for a short time bein a newbie & all,but the friendship he offered was solid & real,as if his entire motivation was to make the world a bit softer to land in...
I wish I could ease a bit of the grief I feel here...I offer all of you big virtual hugs...
Peace...
flavorbuster

Mar 25 @ 3:17PM  
I'm very saddened by this !!! I knew he was a good man & voiced that to him on his last bulletin that he wrote about having to leave due to health problems. I'll sure miss him & my deepest condolences go out to all who he touched for this very tragic loss. He will not be forgotten & always be remembered. I'm very sorry to hear this & I give my thoughts & prayers.
Luvrgrl

Mar 25 @ 3:19PM  
May your soul be at peace dear Man.....
Wordsofwit

Mar 25 @ 4:09PM  
his entire motivation was to make the world a bit softer to land in

There it is And he was the master at it resulting in lives touched being better
TwistAndShout

Mar 25 @ 4:55PM  
I only knew him from his blogs and comments on here. From his writing it was obvious that he was a gentleman and a man with a big heart. You never saw the harshness that many of us (and that certainly includes me) show far too often. My condolences to all of you for the loss of your friend.
DangerousCurves999

Mar 25 @ 5:39PM  
I just logged on and read this sad news. Chuck also wrote to me an always had nothing but the sweetest words and sage advice. He was there when I was going through rough times and there when things got better.

He was like a sunbeam spreading warmth to all those whose lives he touched both here in Pervia and out in the outside world.

The tears began when I read this and won't stop for now. Later today I will smile again with the wonderful memories that Chuck left in my mind.

RIP Chuck.... your life had a profound impact for the better on so many lives. The world is truly a lesser place with you gone.

Love
DC
sugarnspice005

Mar 25 @ 5:58PM  
Sam, thank you so much for the blog and the poem. I loved Chuck, he was a dear friend and I will miss him so much. My heart is breaking not only for our loss here in Pervia, but for his family too.

I always loved his poems...and I loved the occasional feisty blog he throw out there. He was always one to offer a shoulder to lean on.

We lost our Night....I will miss him. I'm so honored to have known such a loving person.

Wherever you are Chuck, I love you.
theSkwirl

Mar 25 @ 6:09PM  
another note.. this time from the Brit:

I am saddened to hear that a dear friend has left us, I remember the times we shared online and his wisdom and humour. I hope he finds peace with God and know that he will be remembered by those who knew and loved him, Rest in peace my old friend
Thenewguy2957

Mar 25 @ 6:42PM  
PeachyKeen

Mar 25 @ 6:48PM  
Thank you, Sam for this post about Chuck. He was real and very generous ...giving so much of himself to others. His last message to me was a delight to receive... all of them were and many of us have received them.

Here's a poem by Marie Frye (1932) I think our Knight would appreciate:

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glint on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you wake in the morning hush,
I am the swift, uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft starlight at night.
Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there, I did not die!

Chuck will live forever in our hearts.
PeachyKeen

Mar 25 @ 6:50PM  
Oops, I knew I'd seen this poem somewhere! Chuck is laughing as this dumb blond move of mine... LOL!
Sorry for the repeat, but it's the one I immediately thought of when I learned about Chuck today.
sugarnspice005

Mar 25 @ 7:04PM  
Here is a link to one of my favorite blogs by Chuck...shows why so many loved him.

NightofOld

Sure could use that yellow ribbon about now.
Sunshine79

Mar 25 @ 7:19PM  
My sincerest condolences, but let us know, we will all meet him once again. Until then, God Bless & RIP. Chuck was always a gentleman & never failed to make me smile. He will truly be missed.
casuallylooking

Mar 25 @ 7:52PM  
Many times when I could not sleep at night, I knew if I came on AMD I would most likely find Chuck online also. So many nights we emailed back and forth while others were busy dreaming.
Now I wish him a very peaceful rest, free of all the pain and suffering he endured.

Farewell ,my friend......
lilofval

Mar 25 @ 8:07PM  
I'm so very sorry to hear this. He was a true gentleman in both senses of the word and a wonderful friend. He will be missed by many.
ladybootscooter

Mar 25 @ 8:26PM  
Chuck had hidden his sickness for quite some time now. Those of us who knew, as you said, were sworn to secrecy. He wasn't just the sweetheart online, he was even kinder and more gracious on the phone if that was possible. I'm just happy that he found at least a brief glimpse of the love and happiness near the end that he had sought for so long. He was a very special friend to so many and his death will leave quite a void in many lives. One more angel has gone home.
Luvrgrl

Mar 25 @ 8:43PM  
I must say that THIS is what keep me here....people like you....WOW! and to think that many of us are connected by invisible miles....we are connected by heartstrings that simply cannot be broken.....this is TRUE LOVE!!!! I am so blessed to even be an acquaintance!
KitKat25

Mar 25 @ 9:39PM  
My heart is quite heavy today at the passing of this wonderful man. Simply put...Chuck was one-of-a-kind. Like CL...I would find myself on AMD late at night...or in the wee hours of the morning. It was during those times...I had the wonderful pleasure of exchanging emails with this kind and gentle soul. He was always quick with a kind word or a whimsical poem...and I really loved that about him.

I had the pleasure of speaking with Chuck several times over the phone...and what I remember most about those conversations was his wonderful sense of humor and his amazing compassion for others. He was a true gentleman in every sense of the word...and he will be sorely missed by those who loved him. Rest in peace Chuck.
rnj1013

Mar 25 @ 9:48PM  
I'm so sorry to hear this. I'm not as regular as most of you here but he always treated me as though he knew me as a friend forever. What a great man he is to know and I'm sorry I didn't get to tell him that 1 more time before he left us. My condolences to all that knew him and will surely miss him. I wish I could write a poem befitting of him.
hog77297

Mar 25 @ 9:52PM  
Really didn't get to know him like the rest of you here but we did mail each other a couple times! I just want to say i would have been prowd to have rode with him as a brother, he was all man!
Gods speed Night
ksk72

Mar 25 @ 10:46PM  
Very sad news to loose such a kind honorable friend. His sanity and wisdom will be missed here.
PinkToeNails

Mar 25 @ 10:50PM  
Thank you all for sharing your feelings about him with everyone else. Just goes to show that we truly are friends here and this is what we want for Pervia.

Chuck was one of a kind. Selfless, caring and always had something nice to say to you. He never seemed bitter about his health and never wanted us to worry about him... but we did. And he knew it! He's probably smiling down on us now and has a warm feeling in his heart knowing that so many people did genuinely love him.

God Bless you Sir.. we will miss you so very much.....
PinkToeNails

Mar 25 @ 10:56PM  
Thank you Sam.
LadyRamRod

Mar 25 @ 11:33PM  
I didn't know Night very well, but he sounded like a real gentlemen, R.I.P.
redbronze

Mar 26 @ 12:19AM  
Wild what a week.. Sad news, Death, Light as a Feather.
borty293

Mar 26 @ 3:29AM  
This is very sad news for me. I admired Chuck and always felt he was a man of his word. I mentioned to him in one of the many emails we sent each other, that If there was a war and I had to choose who I would share a foxhole with, it would definitly be him because I knew he would always have my back.

He truly cared for others. If I wasn't on AMD much ..he would send me an email asking how I was and how about another panty blog.

He was the type of man I strive to be.
tassie1

Mar 26 @ 5:01AM  
a true gentleman has gone to rest, I'm proud to have called him my friend
PinkToeNails

Mar 26 @ 9:37AM  
I was just texting a bit with Alex (OHT) and he's using a cell phone to access this site and I know what a pain it can be to try to communicate with one so I'm going to post a little something for him.
I know he is grief stricken too and wishes he could be here to comment too. Chuck was just nice to everyone and Alex is part of this group. I texted Alex yesterday to tell him the sad news and he was just shocked. We all knew Chuck was sick but we never expect to hear that someone has passed on.
Alex wants everyone to know that he has Chuck in his heart and thoughts. And he will miss him terribly too.

PinkToeNails

Mar 26 @ 10:05AM  
From Alex.......

With tears and a heavy heart i type this. how do we say goodbye to a friend like Chuck? We lost an true angel! I Love ya bro after you get done hugging on your family and friends plz give my mom and baby sis a hug from me plz! I hope someone on amd post a song/poem tribute for Chuck please add "Crying for me" by Toby Kieth if yall do plz
casuallylooking

Mar 26 @ 10:26AM  


For Chuck...from OHT
theSkwirl

Mar 26 @ 12:12PM  
You people make me feel proud to know you. How could any man ask for a better eulogy than this?

Pink, pass some lovin back to OHT for me yeah? Miss his cute self too.
1bunny629

Mar 26 @ 1:48PM  
I am glad someone finally found OHT's number. he is greatly missed! I love you all here and hope you all are doing okay today. I had prayer time last night when I came home from work. I felt peace when speaking of Chuck. I feel at peace when I see everyone here congregating to salute a man of honor, wisdom and a zest for life that we all admired. Hugs to you all, Murphey
whisperingcomet

Mar 26 @ 2:43PM  
thanks pink and ynot for letting me know, the world is a poorer place now, and the universe is richer
ThePurpleProphet

Mar 26 @ 9:28PM  
R.i.p. brother, you touched my heart like few men have. You'll be missed.
DeDe54

Mar 26 @ 10:32PM  
I was told by Sugar. Chuck was a uniquie individual, loved by all. this is so sad. I cared about him deeply, as I do all of you..I don't no what to say at this point............Love to you all........................DeDe
max49

Mar 27 @ 8:50AM  
Goodbye my friend. R.I.P. Chuck. You WILL be missed.
sawduster

Mar 27 @ 2:40PM  
this one man has done a lot of good, and is well remembered for his selfless deeds. if only there were a world full of people like him, it would be a wonderful thing. i was not well acquainted with him, but trust that with the comments here, he will be remembered for a very long time by all who were. it is my loss, but to you knight, a toast. may your spirit continue to give hope to those who knew and loved the man, and his spirit.

Loveyoulongtime2

Mar 27 @ 7:34PM  
He truly is a loss to many of us here and to the world.
DesertSmile

Mar 27 @ 9:28PM  
Even though I have not been on this site in months PTN was kind enough to let me know of Chuck's passing.

He was truly a kind and sensitive man who will be missed my many.

PrincessKissy

Mar 28 @ 1:47AM  
I was very saddened to read about Chuck's passing. G and I cried genuine tears of grief upon finding out. I was so thankful he was here to hold me. Chuck was such a big supporter of the relationship that G and I started on this site, always there with an encouraging word when the difficulty of being 4000 miles apart got us down. Though I didn't speak to him often, I always knew that he would be a kind ear if I needed him. Rest in peace, Chuck, you touched so very many lives in such a positive way. You were, are and always will be loved.
pixiewytch

Apr 3 @ 2:47AM  
Aww he sounds like he was a great man. What's his username, I'm not sure I knew him. I hope his friends start to feel better.
1bunny629

Apr 5 @ 12:20AM  
i will never forget him...he will never be alone....but, the actions that are here are ones he would not behold.
499BLU

May 3 @ 7:50PM  
He was such a wonderful bright shining light in this world.i know my life was truly touched by him and i am a better person because of it.rest in peace Big Brother!!!
LoveTester

Oct 6 @ 10:46AM  

He would have been happy to know he was loved so much, and had so many friends.

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Dearly Beloved; Farewell to Chuck, our Night of Old.