I don't mean to throw a wet blanket on the season, and I probably shouldn't be posting this. It isn't meant to do more than vent some feelings. Many of you may remember about this time last year, my buddy died suddenly of a massive heart attack. It hit me real hard and I proceeded to do something I wouldn't normally do. I held a private wake for him, in what I hope was the best intentioned of good Irish traditions.
Tonight, I’m not holding another one, tho the loss I feel is still deep. But after digging around in my soul today, I find this is part of this years holiday funk. Those of you that viewed my last uploads on photobucket may remember the wishing well. Well, yesterday I took it to his family, as a Christmas gift. I don't keep in close contact with them, but they know, I’m here. And if they need me all they have to do is yell. It may not seem like much to give someone, but with it went all my wishes for good things for all of them. His wife, an RN, and school nurse is still trying to sort out much of what he left behind. His daughter, who he tried to rescue from her life in another state, is still living the same life style, and will probably never give it up. Booze drugs and I have no idea what else, but if it ain’t a party, she isn't into it. His other daughter, about 13 years old, thinks of me as the grandpa she never knew or had, and a grandson that is very intelligent, but has been used and mistreated that came to live with them I think considers me a friend.
The season of boisterous cheer is now pretty much done, and only one more event to get thru. Then slowly, things will get back to what ever normal is. I may even get a bit more ambition to make things for sale. But I still have an ailing brother, and he is getting worse every day, so this time next year, I may not have him. But I suspect he will be around far longer than I will be able to care for him. So yes, I’m pretty melancholy right now. But with no other outlet than to blog about it, I guess you folks that read it will bear the brunt.
But to all here in Pervia, bloggers or not, new and old, may next year bring each and every one better things, and all that you need.
Take Care Sawduster
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soft_touch938

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Dec 26 @ 1:09AM
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Sending you a kudo in the shape of a hug. I know melancholy and I know heartache and grief...and worry over loved ones who are seriously in bad health. There are no words to fix what you're going through. All I can say is I understand and I understand your need to write about it. And your need to hear others telling you in their own words that they hear you and support you with their thoughts and simply just being there.
Hang in there Mike...you'll do whatever you need to do and you'll get through whatever is dealt you and we'll all do our best to be here whenever you need us.
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onehornytoad69

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Dec 26 @ 5:28AM
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Big man hugs to ya!!!!
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PinkToeNails

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Dec 26 @ 10:51AM
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Have another big hug from TN.... that was nice of you to take the wishing well to them. I'm sure they are still struggling to deal with his death, as you are too. We are here anytime you want or need to vent. It would be nice if we could all have friends as thoughful as you!
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Wordsofwit

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Dec 26 @ 11:05AM
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I find myself looking around at people I know with an eye toward next year asking, "Who's next?" There are a lot of folks that I know that are good candidates for the TBD (to be dead) list.
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1bunny629

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Dec 26 @ 3:11PM
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Your words are heard, your thoughts are felt, and your actions speak louder. You're a good man. I hope and pray for good things for you and yours in the year to come. Hugs, Murph
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theSkwirl

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Dec 27 @ 9:05PM
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luvs skwishes and smooches to you duster! Cheers to a happy nude rear!
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