Ed and Sam, two friends well past retirement age, met in the park every day to feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems.
One day Ed didn't show up. Sam didn't think much about it and figured maybe he had a cold or something.. But after Ed hadn't shown up for a week or so, Sam really got worried. However, since the only time they ever got together was at the park, Sam didn't know where Ed lived, so he was unable to find out what had happened to him.
A month had passed, and Sam figured he had seen the last of old Ed, but one day, Sam approached the park and-- lo and behold!--there sat Old Ed!
Sam was very excited and happy to see him and told him so.
Then he said, 'For crying out loud Ed, what in the world happened to you?'
Ed replied, 'I have been in jail.'
'Jail!' cried Sam. What in the world for?'
'Well,' Ed said, 'you know Sue, that cute little blonde waitress at the coffee shop where I sometimes go?'
'Yeah,' said Sam, 'I remember her. What about her?
'Well, one day she filed rape charges against me; and, at 98 years old, I was so proud that when I got into court, I plead 'guilty'.
'The damn judge gave me 30 days for perjury.'
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