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Footprints on your back?

posted 8/28/2010 11:32:09 AM |
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  Wordsofwit

I was kind of thinking (I do that once in a while) and it led me to ask a question that I will let people mull over. Many people, men and women, will not put up with shit from an SO for very long. Yet, they will let their kids walk all over them, sometimes seemingly forever, even after the kid is an adult.

Share your thoughts.

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Comments:

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sawduster

Aug 28 @ 12:05PM  
tough one this, no one answer is going to work for all. for some it is fear and intimidation, others fear of loosing the kids "love" and respect, which is gone anyway. but i think fear is the one thing they share, either that or stupidity. and maybe a combination in some cases. simplistic as always, but boiled down and all the BS removed, that is what i come up with.
somnium

Aug 28 @ 12:27PM  
Kids are good at manipulating their parents to get what they want- but the parent(s) do have the advantage of saying: 'NO'! Saying 'NO' too often to ones SO (generally speaking), can lead to consequences one may not have expected nor wanted!

Compromise, is the best method to resolving possible conflicts- that goes for kids/SO, politicians/constituents, between countries- in everyday life the world over! Take two wheels, one lubricated- (compromise) one not- which one is going to squeak the loudest?

JMO


PinkToeNails

Aug 28 @ 12:31PM  
Damn if I don't relate to that shit! Were you referring to me when you wrote this blog!?!?!

I'm about ready to kill my kid! I want her to MOVE out!!!!!! I've taken entirely too much shit off her and I'm fed up!!

I wish someone would call DHS on me and come get her but she's 22... I don't think they'd come

whisperingcomet

Aug 28 @ 1:19PM  
well brucsky, have you been peeking at my real life????

and i thing the reason that I have helped (over helped my son it seems)my children was because my young adulthood was very tough...nobody helped me with anything! and when i would see them struggling with something, i would think back about how overjoyed i would have been had someone helped me just a little.

but my lesson has been learned.
redbronze

Aug 28 @ 1:42PM  
Blood, Guilt, Stupidity, and what the others said...
StraddleMyNose

Aug 28 @ 2:31PM  
Yeah, been guilty of this in the past. With the circumstances and all, I tried to do a lot for my daughter, and she took full advantage of it. I no longer put up with this from her. I will help her occasionally with money, but not like I did.
soft_touch938

Aug 28 @ 6:23PM  
I agree with the others but I want to add one more...lazy. They are too lazy to take the bull by the horns. It's just easier to let the kids do what they want than to stand against them and deal with the war that will explode. They don't want to rock the boat...make waves....spend the energy and time it takes to deal with the consequences of saying no.

And the same goes with having an SO....just easier to ride the waves than make waves.
whisperingcomet

Aug 28 @ 6:37PM  
my son didnt even bother to wipe the bullshit off his feet before he took a stroll on my back....
KitKat25

Aug 28 @ 6:51PM  
Many people, men and women, will not put up with shit from an SO for very long.

A lot will...but that's a whole other blog isn't it?

they will let their kids walk all over them, sometimes seemingly forever, even after the kid is an adult.
I played the "doormat" for a brief period of time when my son was an older teen...and trying to make that difficult transition into a young adult. He took advantage of the situation...so "tough love" was initiated. I don't have to fall back on the "tough love" routine too often these days...but it's still in my arsenal just in case.


sturgerl

Aug 29 @ 1:15AM  
Oh Oh Oh pick me pick me....... I know the answer... Pick me.


Gotta love your kids... it's nature
Don't gotta love you SO... It's nerture

look answered the question and managed to drop two Psych refferences.
Sunshinegal35

Aug 29 @ 4:14PM  
I find the older I get, the less shit I'm willing to put up with from anyone! My son included! And believe me, he sure does try! I'm lucky- my son is a good boy who follows the rules I set for him. He rarely does anything bad. He gets good grades at school, and is in marching band and on the golf team. He's also very, very polite. He has good manners. He holds doors open for people, etc.He's basically every parent's dream.
But I lived in a culture that coddles their children. Japan. From babyhood thru about 8th grade, Japanese kids can get away with murder! Anything from hitting their younger sibling on the head with a chair to not giving up their train seat to an elderly person. Moms will say, "Now stop that!" but the kids know she won't do anything to serious discipline them, so they just keep on doing what they're doing! It's very interesting because from high school on Japanese kids are expected to just turn on a dime and suddenly become and adult. It's during high school years that the push for getting into a good college starts, and parents just expect their kids to pony up to the challenge.
I'd be the last person to tell anyone how to raise their child. I know I wouldn't like it if someone stuck their nose into my parenting business, so I don't do that to others. Butt man, when I lived in Japan and saw that BS going on it nearly drove me crazy! I was on a train once, and an elderly woman using a cane got on. Three high school boys (I knew they were high school because of their uniforms) were sitting in seats near where she stood, and not a one of them got up. In fact, they sat there, pointing at her cane, and saying not-so-nice things about getting old. When I heard that, I lost it! I went over to where they were sitting and literally cussed them up one side and down the other in Japanese, saying how rude they were and how they should be kinder to senior citizens. I asked them how they would feel if it were their grandma....After being berated in public they all three got up from their seats, bowed, apologized to the lady, and moved toward the train door. She and two other elderly women took their seats. They thanked me for coming to their aid and we spent the rest of the train ride discussing how rude young Japanese could be. But...from that day on, if those kids saw someone who needed a seat, they automatically gave theirs up. I think they learned a little something something that day! LOL

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Footprints on your back?