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I Wonder Why More Straight Guys Don't Do This?

posted 8/5/2010 8:06:49 AM |
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tagged: dancing

Maybe it's just my town, but probably not. A girlfriend dragged me out to swing dance lessons tonight. It was my first time.

There weren't nearly enough men.

Now it seems to me, that guys could easily pick up on chicks at a place like this.

Granted, a lot of people there were already couples. But as I said, there were extra women & we didn't all get to practice every time they had us rotate because of it. And then one of the couples got clingy & stopped rotating, which was frustrating. I'm all for dancing w/ the person of your choosing, but it's hard to practice partners dancing w/out a partner. And when one group is outnumbered, not sharing is not cool.

But anyhoo....

There were at least 4 extra ladies & I'm certain not all the dudes were straight. So this seems like great territory for a straight single guy to come in check out the scene.

Guys who can dance can score. Guys who are willing to learn to dance can score.
No, you don't have to already know what you're doing. Most of us didn't. I certainly didn't. I was just happy when I rotated & found a partner in front of me. A place where a woman is just happy to see you? Doesn't that sound nice?

I don't know the issue a lot of straight men seem to have w/ dancing. Especially when it comes to swing. It's upbeat, you can wear jeans, the music rocks & it's sexy. Not Latin dance sexy, which I'm sure would also be something good for guys to check out. But sexy in that people are doing the splits & kicking their legs in the air & chicks are sliding under/between the men's legs. And afterward everyone is hot, sweaty, thirsty & feeling great. Sound familiar?
Ok, we weren't all doing that on the first day, but the instructors & advanced students were. It was really fun to watch.

Here's the other thing. While a lot of those couples are already... well... couples, not every gal can get her boyfriend to go dancing w/ her. So yes, there may be an extra there who is technically spoken for. But say you go every week. Dance w/ her & get to know her. That's one day a week that she's more impressed w/ you than him.
Also, if you're going every week, it shows that you can make a commitment to something. So if you're looking for more than just scoring, this is helpful. Anyway, weeks turn to months & she's got herself a new boyfriend. One who can dance. Or if not, you can still get a little thrill knowing that you shared something w/ her that her own boyfriend wouldn't & it didn't involve any cheating. Guilt-free intimacy. And maybe a free peak down her halter-top. Just sayin'.

If you're more the free spirit who doesn't want women getting the wrong idea about commitment, it doesn't matter. It's swing dance! As far as I know, it's not something prudish-types do. You may find a partner who feels the same.

So guys, if you don't like the bar scene & you want to meet some real women, check out your local swing dance lessons.
All you have to do is show up, not be creepy, smile & be nice to the cute chick who can't dance.

(Pro tip: Be nice to everyone there; it's endearing to the one you're going for. But be even better to her. Know what I mean?)

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I Wonder Why More Straight Guys Don't Do This?


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Aug 5 @ 9:33AM  
I'm beginning to think guys don't wanna dance like they use to when I was younger...and especially swing dance. They don't know what they're missing!

And welcome to Pervia Blogland. A quick may get more comments if you set them to auto approve.

Aug 5 @ 11:51AM  
Thank you!

Aug 5 @ 12:54PM  
That's a great idea. You're right, guys should learn to dance. I love to dance and if a guy shows interest in it too he is uped his annie for sure! Good blog!

Aug 5 @ 12:57PM  
Welcome to the blogs. Well written, well thought out post. Very refreshing change of pace from most first time posters.

I'm beginning to think guys don't wanna dance

What took you so long to figure that one? If it wasn't for picking up woman, most guys would have nothing to do with it.

I have only known a handful of guys who ever enjoyed dancing for the sake of dancing. Those that did were into C & W. It may be one of those gender things to a large extent like watching football versus Dancing With the Stars.

It was always an activity for most guys I knew and myself aimed at meeting women, trying to pick up women and pleasing women early in the dating phase. After that, the horizontal bop was the only dancing of interest. I don't know any guys that ever took their wives dancing.

Aug 5 @ 1:13PM  
Swing dance is more obscure and kids my age do do it, its just more unheard of than going to a sweaty, smokey club and grinding on eachother, but younger folk are into it. Hard to find dancehalls where they do; in my town its just usually a charity event sponsored by the University.

Aug 5 @ 6:30PM  
This was a fun blog to read. I'm not one for dancing..but, what you talked about just sounds fun. I've seen swing dancing on fact, I saw a Leann Rimes video at my parent's house a while back where she did a remake of the song "Swingin" and the video concept was from back in the day when there were dance contests..the ones where couples see who can dance the longest. And they were doing some "swinging" in that video.


Looks like a blast.

Aug 5 @ 6:39PM  
Thank you for all of the nice comments!

At this point, I'd like to see guys getting back into social dancing even if it was only to pick up on women. At least we'd have some partners. Although I think if more men took their wives & girlfriends dancing, they'd appreciate the extra attention they'd get in the bedroom later for it.
It does 2 things, I think. Firstly, the woman appreciates that he took her out & all the lovely tension the dance creates. Secondly, other women are bound to notice & also appreciate him just for being there. Watching him dance w/ someone else could make some possessive feelings kick in (probably like the couple who stopped rotating at practice) & she will do more later to regain his attention.

As for ballroom/swing/Latin, etc vs club dancing, maybe I'm a tad bit old fashioned, but I think the former is far sexier. Sure, bumping & grinding is lusty, but not much is left to the imagination. In swing & such, there is so much exquisite sexual tension that can be created, but not the ability to act on it. Hands can accidentally brush bottoms & chests. You really have to look your partner in the eyes, which means *glances* can be exchanged. You may not be thisclose during the whole dance, so the natural push & pull creates some great tension as well. The build up of all that can send a couple speeding home to tear each other's clothes off.

Here's another bonus for the guys. If ladies are really into it, they'll start dressing the part. This means skirty-skirts (my term) that twirl & maybe show off her shorts. Halter tops. Close-fitting capris. Cute stuff. And guys, if you want to dress the part, the clothes are the best! Look up men's swing fashion & you'll see what I mean. I have to say personally that guys who look like they stepped out of the 40s are HOT.

I live in a town of about half a million. A respectable size, but I'm unaware of any dance halls. (Although some organization lodges may host.) Our swing lessons were in a regular dance studio. So it just takes a little looking into.


Aug 5 @ 7:00PM  
Where I live, single men have more difficulty finding dance partners than single women. I have been to open dances that have ballroom and swing and have found it a rarity to see a woman without a partner, though there are always single men without one. This also applies to men wanting to take dance lessons.

Aug 5 @ 7:29PM  
I live in a town of about half a million. A respectable size, but I'm unaware of any dance halls.

I live in the Dallas/Fort Worth metroplex, 6.5 million people. There has been a big decline in dance halls and clubs that feature it over the last ten years or so. There used to be a lot of big C & W clubs with dancing and live bands that heavily advertised extensively. I don't hear about them now. But then again I an old hippie. It is just a distant observation as a result. However clubs that have live music for people to listen to without a dance floor remain abundant.

Aug 5 @ 7:55PM  
Let me slide you a kudo. It is a small token of esteem awarded by people that relate to a point or appreciate a blog post. Your blog and the course of commentary got me to thinking (very rare these days on here ) when I add all of this up:

I Wonder Why More Straight Guys Don't Do This?

If it wasn't for picking up woman, most guys would have nothing to do with it.

I live in a town of about half a million. A respectable size, but I'm unaware of any dance halls.

I am thinking that the driver of dancing used to be the converging point for people to meet somebody to potentially replace a girlfriend/boyfriend or get laid. Now with STDs and the Internet, the whole bar scene and meat market has diminished as the vehicle to meet new people outside of the workplace, mutual friends, etc. As a result to a large extent, these elements may combine leading to the dance halls and meat markets with dancing riding off into the sunset following the path of drive in movies.

What do you people think?


Aug 5 @ 8:41PM  
I just think times have changed and most people have too many other things they can do for entertainment. Back before the internet there were about three places to meet people school for the younger crowd, dances, or church. Now they go online and look. And most men I have met would rather have root canal without novocaine than dance. LOL

Aug 5 @ 8:45PM  
I'd love to meet a man who would like to learn to dance!! I think that would be awesome!!

Any takers??

Aug 5 @ 9:28PM  
most men I have met would rather have root canal without novocaine than dance.


I'd love to meet a man who would like to learn to dance!! I think that would be awesome!!

Any takers??

Most guys think it sucks, so unless they think you will, they won't. Now I have met guys that enjoy dancing, but their boyfriends were always quite jealous.


Aug 5 @ 11:16PM  
Oh but Bruce..... I think you would look VERY suave and sexy out on the dance floor..... gazing into the eyes of the woman you are sharing that moment with... and just think..... the sex afterwards could be pretty hot!!


Aug 6 @ 4:09AM  
Personally, I don't go dancing cuz I can't.

I make the Macarena look like a mime having an epileptic fit.

When I've tried the electric slide, I look like I'm on unbalanced roller skates.

And anything more complicated than that, well..

You know that bear at the circus with the fez that rides the unicycle?
Imagine if he broke his leg, but decided to still try to do the Charleston at the end.
He'd still have to lead me.

All my rhythm comes in the form of clapping, which is why I dig concerts

Aug 6 @ 5:32AM  
I can't dance either, really. But I went anyway. There was no pressure to be perfect, the music was good & it was an enjoyable way to spend an evening w/ my friend.

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I Wonder Why More Straight Guys Don't Do This?