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Letting a person know or not when dropping them off your friends list

posted 6/5/2010 9:05:38 PM |
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tagged: straddle, amd, friends, people
  StraddleMyNose

Are you the type that lets the other person know that you're dropping them off your friends list, or do you just take them off and hope that they don't realize it until some time has passed? Do you only remove only people from your list that have been inactive for over three months, or do you just keep them on it?

I have a friend that this happened to a while back, and they thought this was pretty rude and childish.

I will admit, I have been guilty of this a few times over the last year or two with a few people I had butted heads with, and I realize that was wrong, and I apologized to the both of them afterwards after our misunderstanding. We remained friends since then, and I would never do this again unless I felt it was warranted and the friendship was beyond repairing. I now talk with people if I felt that our friendship had been damaged before deciding whether I should remove them or not before getting that knee jerk reaction.

So, what makes you delete a person off your friends list, and would you notify the person you were deleting, or would you delete them on a sly?

Bonus question:

If you were confronted by a person that you had removed from your friends list without having said anything to them, how would you handle the situation?

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Comments:

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theSkwirl

Jun 5 @ 9:21PM  
Depends on how pissed off I am at the time.. or what I'm trying to do.
theSkwirl

Jun 5 @ 9:21PM  
Oh, and you know already how I handled it.
StraddleMyNose

Jun 5 @ 9:23PM  
Oh, and you know already how I handled it.
True! I'm glad everything was worked out afterwards.
lunanegra

Jun 5 @ 10:02PM  
No, I dont let people know, sometimes I dont even know when because I have a quick temper and do things I felt were stupid in hindsight.

For people who just add friends for the sake of adding them with any follow through, yeah I drop them without notice. I wont be apart of their insecurity.


If you were confronted by a person that you had removed from your friends list without having said anything to them, how would you handle the situation?

I've confronted people about it sometimes, no one's ever said anything to me because I havent dropped anyone lately.
zaralyon

Jun 5 @ 10:37PM  
I've only dropped people that I was either had not heard from them in a while or honestly wasn't interested in keeping them on my friends list. But I'm very shy and not one to chat a lot so have never really had an altercation of any kind with those on my friends list, so I'm not a good one to ask.
sugarnspice005

Jun 5 @ 10:40PM  
When I first joined here, I'd get friend requests, and, not wanting to hurt feelings, I'd just accept. Since then, I've gotten to where if the person is on my friends list, then that is because they are a friend. So...I did some "cleaning up" a while ago and deleted the ones I've never had any contact with other than they sent out a friend request.

Did I tell them? No...I didn't. What would I have done if they had asked? I would tell them that since I never hear from them..I see no reason for them to be on my friends list.
RJ53

Jun 5 @ 10:40PM  
Yes I have dropped people without telling them. They were on their way to being blocked for various reasons. None of them ever confronted me because I am sure they knew exactly why they were removed.

Some I have deleted because we have not communicated in months and I saw no need to leave them on the list.
Wordsofwit

Jun 6 @ 4:41AM  
I never have given it any thought. I don't tend to be reactive so people on the list remain there.
dmbchick420

Jun 6 @ 11:56AM  
I've never removed anyone from my list that I think of offhand. I have had a couple people do it to me though without any reason and nothing was ever said.
KitKat25

Jun 6 @ 10:22PM  
I only have friends on my friend's list. I don't think I would delete them just because we had a disagreement, as I try not to give into knee-jerk emotions. However, I have had a couple of friends delete me from their list without any notice and at the time, I was a bit surprised. I don't think I would confront them because I just consider myself better off without them if they're going to act so childish. JMO.
ladybootscooter

Jun 6 @ 11:22PM  
Without beating a long dead horse, a few years ago, you may remember I completely cleared my list. Not that I was mad at anyone in particular. There was just alot of fueding going on and this friend was mad at that friend, etc, until I cleared them all off at once.
Since then yeah I've had my bitchy moments and had folks remove me from their lists. Never let it bother me too much. I have only friends on mine and never could stand the "collectors" you'll find online.
ladybootscooter

Jun 6 @ 11:23PM  
OH and I did let everyone know before I cleared the list! Sorry forgot to actually answer the question!
Cootiesprayer

Jun 7 @ 4:01PM  
I have taken people off without telling them, but it's usually a big deal & they have never bothered to ask me why either...usually though if it's a good friend like a lot of you I would tell you if I was mad at you, but then you already know that chuckle.
StraddleMyNose

Jun 7 @ 8:27PM  
I have had a couple of friends delete me from their list without any notice and at the time, I was a bit surprised.
Yeah, same here. Had one delete me off about a year or two ago. I thought he was a pretty nice guy, and come to find out, he really wasn't all that nice as he made himself out to be. So I was actually glad he took me off his friends list.

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Letting a person know or not when dropping them off your friends list