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Do U Wanna Fuck Me? Oh...YEAH!

posted 5/7/2010 7:17:03 AM |
1 kudogive kudos what's this?
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tagged: whig
  DickSlippery

Well do ya...do ya...do ya...do ya?
Do U wanna blow meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee?


LOLOL I dont give a fuck what anybody say, Bow-Wow-Wow fucking rocked. That bitch wuz fine as fuck with her mohawk and shit!!!

Ok, so I wuz reading the Peachinator's blog a couple of hours ago (that's right U fucking smartasses, I do read the blogs that are actually worth reading. So, that means if Im not reading Ur blog, then maybe Im not the fucking problem...) and it got me 2 thinking (and we all know how bad that can be...) About just how long I have been trapped here in Pervia. Are U sitting the fuck down? Ive been up in this bitch since 2006, muthafuckas! Keepin it real and holdin shit down on the north side, niggas! What what? Naw...but seriously, yo? I been here so fucking long I feel like I should be elected Mayor or something.

Yeah...Ur probably right. Im never gonna be elected Mayor of Pervia. I just don't have the votes. I have about as much chance of winning any fucking election as the Shapiro boys had of joining the Nazi Party in 1938 (its always good 2 get out in front of that kinda shit...). In other words...absolutely fucking none. But U know what? My girl Sunshine damn sho got the votes! Let that bitch be mayor of this motherfucker. I dont give a FUCK! We've been fake married 4 three fucking years anyway, so it looks like Im gonna be fake fucking the Mayor, huh? Oh wait...shit...I 4got who we were talking about. Takes some of the shine off when she askes EVERYONE if they wanna fuck, dont it?

Im sorry...I 4got wtf I wuz talking about B4 I started fantasizing about Floridian pussy...shit...it wuz something about something, I do remember that much...Im pretty sure anyway...Oh yeah...being elected Mayor of this motherfucker...thats right thats right cuz I been blogging on here so fucking long...GODDAMN but Ive been blogging up on AMD 4 a minute!

As a matter of fact, the next time I post it will be my 350th fucking blog!!! ARE U FUCKING SERIOUS? 350 fucking blogs? That really is fucking huge, man. And I can promise U that out of those 350 blogs there had 2 be seven of them worth reading (present example not included 4 obvious reasons...). At least thats what I heard. I wouldnt know myself. What? U think I read this crap? Pahleeeze...

So Im thinking I need 2 do something special 4 my 350th blog, right? Except I dunno what 2 do. Something crazy...something different...something...else...but Ive no idea what. Hopefully it will come 2 me. It usually duz...

What I originally wanted 2 do (what I wanted 2 do 4 the past three some odd years, if U wanna be technical about the shit...) wuz actually meet someone from this fucking site and hang out with them 4 awhile, then go back and blog about the experience later 4 everyone else's amusement. That wuz the plan, anyways, and I even got so far as a date with a long-time AMD resident pervert (at least as long as me, shit...) 4 this Friday night. YIKES! OMG – is that even fucking possible? I mean...could DickSlippery actually exist somewhere OTHER than these pages and the imaginations of those who read them? HOLY SHIT but thats a scary fucking idea!

Cuz U may not believe this (even tho I have like zero reason 2 motherfuckin lie...) but it really duz take an incredible amount of sheer effort on my part 2 assume the DickSlippery persona (are U kidding me? Like the jacking off eight times a day isnt enough 2 kill my old ass anyways...) 4 the short windows of time needed 2 reach out and touch U all with my words (Ironically, once DS duz show up, he usually spends the majority of his time and efforts trying 2 touch U all with his genitals instead...).

See, Im all the time complaining about motherfuckers on AMD living someplace other than here. Its fucking bullshit. Most of the time they live somewhere east of the fucking Mississippi River (U know who U are...no need 2 name names) 4 that matter! How the fuck am I supposed 2 travel 1500 miles just 2 hang out (and when I say hang out I really mean hang out! U know what Im saying?) with someone off the fucking internet? Never fucking mind that with my luck Ive got a WAY better chance of running N2 the cat from To Catch a Predator and having 2 explain why I brought a six-pack of wine coolers, lube and a DVD copy of High School Musical 3 along with me than I do of ever getting laid, 4 Christ's sake! Nevermind all that bullshit. The real question that we are all afraid 2 ask (but everyone secretly wants 2 know...) is whether or not unleashing this character N2 an unsuspecting real world is as good an idea in actual practice as it seems 2 be on paper. I suspect not.

Come 2 think of it, what with the fragile state of the global environment being what it is anyway, it really could be considered unsafe (and irresponsible) 2 set someone as incredibly fucking HOT as DickSlippery loose on an unsuspecting planet. U might even get in trouble behind some shit like that. U know – what with global warming and all that hullaballoo? We certainly wouldnt want Greenland melting away N2 the North Atlantic now, would we?

CONTINUED IN COMMENTS

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   read more blogs!

Blogs by DickSlippery:
Slip on this!
telling on myself 101
If it walks like a duck...
Is this better, goddamnit???
Are U Fucking Serious???
It really cant be just me...can it?
EX-WIVES, PICK-UP TRUCKS AND WATERMELON WHINE
just some shit 2 think about...
Where have I been???? Where have U been is more like it!!!
WHO???
Something somebody said sometime...
Anyone looking for cruise tickets...CHEAP?
Do U Wanna Fuck Me? Oh...YEAH!
All That Showers Isn't Golden...
Slippin Round the Dial with Dick
Do dyslexic stoners get high at 2:40?
fucking around with the natural order of things?
A little help?
Interview with a Canadian
DickSlippery...Entrip...intre...untra...Businessman!
I (heart) Girls!!!!!
Its like they're looking in a mirror...
I had 2 say thanks...
Terror in the Heartland
The Billion Dollar Hand Job (without a happy ending)


Comments:

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DickSlippery

May 7 @ 7:20AM  
I mean, c'mon...I wanna get my dick sucked as much as the next guy (ok...maybe not the next guy. He's obviously some kind of fucking weirdo. A fucking wack job, thats what he is. Yeah...fuck that guy. But the guy after him? U betcha...), but do I really feel comfortable risking a planet-wide catastrophy just so's I can get my knob polished? Am I really that fucking selfish? Really?

Well...I guess that all depends. Mostly I think it probably boils down 2 whether or not I get 2 see a bitch's titties or not. Cuz I gotta be honest...once a bitch pulls them babies out in front of me? Yeah...its pretty much a fucking wrap at that point. Aint none of U motherfuckers about 2 get me away from a bitch showing me her tits. It just aint happening, trust me. Id just be standing there staring at them all slackjawed and shit, like I was somebody's retarded little sister or a blind motherfucker seeing the sun 4 the first time or something. Slob running all down my chin and shit...getting all on the front of my shirt. Trust me...that shit aint fucking pretty. Titties really are my fucking Kryptonite. Ain't that a motherfucking bitch?

Now Im gonna have 2 think about this shit 4 awhile and process it. I never realized what kind of monster I had become! Its like I wuz wearing fur or throwing away recyclable bottles or something. I feel dirty now. And not in the way all U fucking perverts like me 2 be dirty, either! Closer 2 Japanese porn dirty, actually.

So on that happy note I am off 2 the showers. Until next time I guess I'll just keep

Keeping U posted

DS
Sunshine79

May 7 @ 7:32AM  
I think I'm gonna answer yes to all your questions. And let me say this, if there were a mayor of Pervia, it'd be YOU! Happy Friday Soul Brother!!
xquseme

May 7 @ 10:05AM  
Cuz I gotta be honest...once a bitch pulls them babies out in front of me? Yeah...its pretty much a fucking wrap at that point.
Titties? Oh yeah. Say no more. Some of God's greatest gifts. But just the left ones
(Me being right handed and all...)!!
But since they come in pairs...What the hell...throw in the right ones, too...!!
theSkwirl

May 7 @ 1:01PM  
As a former King and Prezident of Pervia? You want this fucked up fucking job? Dood I'd give it to you and give you a buck to take it! Kudo whore.. now that's the job for me.. cept it means I gotta pump out more meaningless drivel on a regular basis in order to keep the coffers full n shit.

Whaddya say Pervia? Do we want Dick or what?
sugarnspice005

May 7 @ 7:45PM  
Whaddya say Pervia? Do we want Dick or what?

YES!!! Dick for Mayor of Pervia!
KitKat25

May 7 @ 9:11PM  
I said it before...and I'll say it again...you're a freakin' hoot!

Yeah...okay...Dick for Mayor Pervia.

Now...about those trolls? What is your position and how do you plan to rid Pervia of them?
LuuvaGrl

Jul 27 @ 10:59PM  
I just want DICK!!!!

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