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A Muse Resumes - Re-musing Resume`

posted 4/28/2010 7:04:39 PM |
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  Pudge2you

"Woke up this morning with a wine glass in my hand..."

Helooo Pervia.

Got an interesting letter via Pervian Express recently. The envelope was a little sticky and the corners were chewed and there was a small stain on it, but it arrived in basically one piece.

It was an application for a job posting I recently put out there. It read:

Dear Sir,

I am writing in application for the position of Muse. I prefer the cowgirl but will take whatever available position you are up for. I bring to this position (cough) years of experience.

My personal qualifications include, but are not limited to, being a self-starter, willing to work alone or with a group, able to quickly learn new techniques in order to further my employment, reliable, and will finish what I start.

I hope that you will consider me for this and any other position for which you may find me qualified.

PS. I'll let you keep your nuts if you hire me.


I thought I would share my reply with you today. (I'm just that kind of open guy ya know...)


Dear Laplickant,

I am quite intrigued by your deep understanding of the requirements for this position. However, before we take this to the personal examination errr... interview stage I would like to make you aware of a few of the hazzards this job may entail.

You may incur any or all of the following while performing the duites of this position, including but not limited to:

Rug burns, hours of dicktation (...and not necessarily the Slippery kind), endless repeat requests, dizzyness, loss of balance, head rushes, shortness of breath, dampness, mild tail pain.

I am quite impressed by your finishing skills. In fact your references speak highly of that particular skill. I am curious why they all seemed out of breath in our conversations, however.

I am enclosing a copy of a manual written by some Indian guy that details the possibilties and variety of positions you may find yourself in if you choose to continue your pursuit of this... errrrr... position.

PS. I'm glad you like nuts.



I just sent this out through the normal channels, but I better try the not-so-normal channels as well, I believe this one may be a bit difficult to pin down.



Maybe not.


"Do you... YOU! ...feel like I do?"

Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)

   read more blogs!

Blogs by Pudge2you:
A Muse Resumes - Re-musing Resume`
The Swing of Things...
Without a Sound
The Pot...
Answers....
Grumps on Sumps and Other Wisdom...
Fahhhhhh Q!!!
Happy New..... wait a miniute...
Change...
This Blog is Ticking...
Part 3: Phallic Soliloquy...
The Pervian Playground Anal-oh-gee!
Regurgitation.... WoW style...
I think it's great...
Times That Try Pervian Souls...
Do You Know Me?
The Debrief...
Mosaic...
Bait and Switch...
The Moon...
Somebody, Anybody, H E L P!
People of Pervia Unite!!!!
Special Delivery...
Old Game...
The Red Pill...


Comments:

post a comment!

theSkwirl

Apr 28 @ 7:19PM  
Dear Sir,

Hazards in the workplace do not deter me in my determination to excel at this position. Or that position for that matter.

I excel at taking dicktation when it is presented orally. I don't get bored easily by performing the same task over and over and over and under. Having caught my tail in a rat trap one time it's kind of numb so you'd really have to keep me hopping to cause it pain.

My references tend to be a bit sweaty and generally out of breath. I think it's because they have testosterone poisoning. I do hope that their recommendations were stellar, however.

I've perused the manual by the indian guy and have furthered my education with advanced courses using this textbook.

I look forward to meeting with you at your earliest convenience to further dickscuss my qualifications.

Sincerely,

theSkwirl

PS your nuts are nice!
theSkwirl

Apr 28 @ 7:20PM  
I kudoed Pudge in public.. were y'all watchin? It was FUN .. you should try it!
theSkwirl

Apr 28 @ 7:35PM  
holy shit.. did we intimidate em all? Perhaps they are still rubbing in the Prep H? Hellooooo.. is anyone IN HERE???
Pudge2you

Apr 28 @ 7:42PM  
heh heh you are fantastic! Thank yooooooooooo!
borty293

Apr 28 @ 7:53PM  
Hey ..where the hell have you been?

Since your mysterious departure I have run out of those little blue pills and have experienced extreme shrinkage...I even gotta sit down to pee cus I can't find the damn thing

Yours truly Professor Pan.T.Borty
sugarnspice005

Apr 28 @ 7:54PM  
holy shit.. did we intimidate em all? Perhaps they are still rubbing in the Prep H? Hellooooo.. is anyone IN HERE???

Wasn't intimidated at all....just chillin here.
ynot7769

Apr 28 @ 8:06PM  

whos worried OR scared


FREE FOR ALL
Ewe_Wish

Apr 28 @ 8:07PM  
Well that figures ..........the skwirl gets to be your muse.........WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I wanted to be your muse..........tho it is true a skwirl can do so much more than a sheepie can.............and actually I just wanted to fumble your nuts for a short time........................
PinkToeNails

Apr 28 @ 8:11PM  
This blog just deserves a bunch of kudos!!


theSkwirl

Apr 28 @ 8:12PM  
Sheepy! We could duomuse!
Pudge2you

Apr 28 @ 8:12PM  
Can always use twos muse...

That wouldn't be baaaad at all...

theSkwirl

Apr 28 @ 8:19PM  
mebbe we could tag-muse!
theSkwirl

Apr 28 @ 8:23PM  
Oooh I got it.. I GOT IT! We can bimuse him!! He can handle it.. maybe.
ynot7769

Apr 28 @ 8:24PM  


this what ya mean???
Pudge2you

Apr 28 @ 8:24PM  
heh heh... I'd love to die tryin!
Ewe_Wish

Apr 28 @ 8:43PM  
Sheepy! We could duomuse!
Pudge....Skwirly and I will be musing together.....wanna join us?
ynot7769

Apr 28 @ 8:47PM  
apparently my spelling fucked up huh?? i typed what i THOUGHT ya'll ment..but that pic just don't seem right....
whisperingcomet

Apr 28 @ 10:50PM  
"Woke up this morning with a wine glass in my hand..."

Yummy, my favorite way to wake up!

1bunny629

Apr 29 @ 1:18PM  
what are you listening too??? is that the eagles at the end...or...eerrr...what tune, by whom???
theSkwirl

Apr 29 @ 4:39PM  
Bunny, bunny bunny, hunnny... it's Frampton... always been frampton.. do you feel like I do?

come on.. let's do it aga ain!

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A Muse Resumes - Re-musing Resume`