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Puns for Educated Minds

posted 4/15/2010 8:54:37 PM |
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Puns for Educated Minds

1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.

3.. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.

5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blown-a-part.

8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

9. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

11. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

12. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'

13. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

14. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'

15. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

16. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

17. A backward poet writes inverse.

18. In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes..

19. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

20. If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine.

If this is a repost..I apologize.

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Comments:

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onehornytoad69

Apr 15 @ 8:59PM  
Good ones!!! Good to see ya!!!
B9CC1D

Apr 15 @ 9:00PM  
Thank YOU!
B9CC1D

Apr 15 @ 9:04PM  
And to add here, I'd like to salute the most violent of the Abstract Expressionists, Jack the Dripper.
theSkwirl

Apr 15 @ 9:56PM  
Those are some really good ones! I found em very punny!
shyguy140

Apr 16 @ 8:43AM  
I like these
sugarnspice005

Apr 16 @ 9:16AM  
Those were good! Leaving a kudo for the morning chuckle.
B9CC1D

Apr 16 @ 11:42AM  
Looks like the Canadian Women's team is doing well in the 2010 Curling championships again. If they win they'll be rock stars.
mrknowuwell

Apr 16 @ 4:01PM  
the dog catcher came home smelling of pussy
ShadowMale

Apr 17 @ 2:37PM  
Sir Cumference

My ex named my pecker that for being thick.... then she renamed it humpty dumpty for being short and thick...

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Puns for Educated Minds