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Bort's Pussy Band Aid

posted 3/2/2010 8:10:09 PM |
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Have you ever had your pussy kicked so hard by the crack whore at the local 711...that it swells up the size of a cantelope?

Have you ever viciously cut yourself while shaving your pussy or accidently turned your Clit Enlarger up to ten and became a Hot Chick With A Big Dick?

Have no fear ..Bort is here.

With suggestions from Sunshine and Flavour, I have been busy in the panty laboratory developing a vaginal band aid that fights infection and gently soothes your throbbing pussy with millions of tiny finger like projections.

All you need is 9.99 for the pussy band aids and I'll throw in a starter Panty Bush free of charge....why I'll even cum to your residence and apply the pussy band aid myself. I may need to lick the vaginal area for a few minutes before the band aid can be applied.

Here are a few testemonials....Bort gave me a good licking and now my throbbing pussy is all better with the application of my Pussy Band Aid.

Now it doesn't matter how many times the crack whore kicks my pussy. All I need to do is apply Borts Pussy Band Aid and my vagina sighs with relief.

So get those orders in folks.

Always working for you ....Professor Pan.T.Borty

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   read more blogs!

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post a comment!


Mar 2 @ 8:22PM  
Do you get a discount if you buy them by the case?

Mar 2 @ 8:32PM  
Yes Alybia...10per cent.....We can send them over in the panty van ...if I can find Max49.

Mar 2 @ 8:34PM  
10 percent discount if bought by the case? I'll take a case!!

Mar 2 @ 8:43PM  
Come on fella's works for sore testicles as well...but don't count on me to do any preliminary licking...get the dog to do that....

Mar 2 @ 8:53PM  
so their not like licking a postage stamp then.?
kudo's for the chuckles..

Mar 2 @ 8:59PM  

That's our Borty. Kudo my friend.

Mar 2 @ 9:03PM  
I regularly get kicked in the balls by crack whores. When they see my longhorn they say you ain't fucking me with that! Then I get kicked where it hurts the most while my pants are around my ankles, Fucken slut bitches, just want the $$. I just use a padded bra to support my balls, works for me!

Mar 2 @ 10:07PM  
Have you ever viciously cut yourself while shaving your pussy
Damn straight i have............and it hurt like hell..........and even worse when i went where were your band aids then?? besides who needs bandaids when you and Father Max are always willing to go around kissing the ladies here boo boos?

Mar 2 @ 10:17PM  
will it help with a sore pussy thats just getting used to much

Mar 2 @ 10:22PM  
Ms. Ewe....ewe no I hadn't invented the pussy band aid when I was living in your closet.

And where the hell is the Skwirl.? I had to kick down the cupboard door to get to the cat food she left for me.. She hasn't been around for days...

Mar 2 @ 10:28PM  
Ksk....sounds like you need.a tube of ...Bort's Cosmic Glide...

Mar 3 @ 9:57AM  
While this recent invention of your's sound wonderful, I'm sure that in a few days we'll be hearing of the problems encountered while weazring said band-aid. I think I am going to pass...and probably not to my regret. However, I still love you.

Mar 3 @ 11:02AM  
Aw Bort...we don't have any 7/11 around here. Our local crack whores are too zombied to kick that high....I don't shave and what the hell is a clit enlarger???

My pussy hasn't a clue anymore what its there for so what I really need is for you to invent some really good uses for retired your spare time if you could....


Mar 3 @ 12:26PM  
All rise !!! The president of the BPBA Association .... The honorable Borty 293 residing. You may be seated..... Mr. President it's in our first nature of business that we can't use the original stuck on band aid cause band aids stuck on me commercial because we asked & heatedly they stressed the copy write laws. With that being said we can have you on camera holding up your merchandise saying get your Pussy Aid Bort's Band Style. In addition Mr. President we got the permission for you to smile like the goofy guy in that keep your dick hard commercial. I have nothing further Mr. President.

Mar 3 @ 2:08PM  
You will probably be able to sell more via the woman's prison than anywherelse.

Mar 3 @ 8:09PM  
*wanders in all scragged out looking gummy*

I was tryin to get that damned bandaid out of my hair.. watch out ladies... you had better order a case of trollium jelly and goo be gone to get the gummy out of your personal hair.

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Bort's Pussy Band Aid