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Perks Of Being An Old Fart

posted 2/2/2010 9:54:55 PM |
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tagged: fuck, funny, sunshine
  Sunshine79

-- Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

-- In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first.

-- No one expects you to run into a burning building.

-- People call at 9 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"

-- People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

-- There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

-- Things you buy now won't wear out.

-- You can eat dinner at 4 PM.

-- You enjoy hearing about other people's operations.

-- You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

-- You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.

-- You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

-- You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.

-- You sing along with the elevator music.

-- Your eyes won't get much worse.

-- Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

-- Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

-- Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

-- Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.


Anybody wanna fuck?

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Comments:

post a comment!

RevDocLove

Feb 2 @ 10:21PM  
Yes ma'am..That's all true...
Plus I can laugh, cough, sneeze, fart and pee all at the same time
PinkToeNails

Feb 2 @ 10:26PM  
You can eat dinner at 4 PM.

Well heck, where I come from, dinner is anytime after 10 AM!! lol

Cute blog!
sugarnspice005

Feb 2 @ 10:32PM  
somnium

Feb 2 @ 11:01PM  
-- No one expects you to run into a burning building.

You won't be ABLE to run into a burning building!

KitKat25

Feb 2 @ 11:12PM  
You sing along with the elevator music.

Ummm...I already do this...and I'm too young to be an "old fart".
LilGriz

Feb 2 @ 11:25PM  
Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

Aaaaa yep

And of course I want to
moe_shemp_larry

Feb 2 @ 11:42PM  
BB King was in town couple weeks ago; told many anecdotes, one of which, was about the fella that got into trouble smoking something ppl thought he shouldn't have; BB added, ah heck, anyone who can SWIM faster than i can walk, can smoke anything he damn well pleases!

RJ53

Feb 2 @ 11:57PM  
Well heck, where I come from, dinner is anytime after 10 AM!! lol

And the evening meal is called supper.
NightOfOld

Feb 3 @ 1:35AM  


PinkToeNails

Feb 3 @ 9:09AM  
Well heck, where I come from, dinner is anytime after 10 AM!! lol


And the evening meal is called supper.

Exactly!

max49

Feb 3 @ 9:42AM  
HEY!!! I resemble most if not all of those things especially the last one.
StraddleMyNose

Feb 3 @ 1:38PM  
Yep, I can see that
1bunny629

Feb 3 @ 1:43PM  
I was beginning to think I had nothing to look forward to!
Dione

Feb 3 @ 7:52PM  
Plus I can laugh, cough, sneeze, fart and pee all at the same time.
This one cracks me up!

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Perks Of Being An Old Fart