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The Art of Speaking to a "Lady"

posted 1/29/2010 9:01:31 PM |
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While going through some old files and papers and such, I found this poem that I wrote for my creative writing class in my senior year of high school. After re-reading I remembered how much I suck at poetry...

The art of speaking to a lady

Is seldom mastered by either sex

For men are far less ridiculous

And women are thrilled with verbal tragedy.

But for arguments sake we shall set aside

Man to lady cruelty by words

And focus simply on a man’s ignorance

(Or as the case may be, their levelheadedness)

Trust, there is a case to be made here.

Men say words such as, “Sure.”

Without realizing that in general

This word has potential to crush dreams

And send all sorts of dreadful signals.

One moment the man has simply said,

“Sure, dinner would be fine.”

While all the woman hears is,

“I have little to no interest in dinner,

And if it weren’t for the food I wouldn't dream

Of being caught in public with you.”

Now, on the other hand when a lady says,


She may as well have said,

“Go to hell, please.”

For both are just as polite.

As mentioned previously,

Carrying on successful conversation

With the opposite sex, dear men,

Will be a skill worth acquiring

Keep in mind, however,

You may have to throw common sense

Clear out of the window

In order to accomplish any such feat.

For women shall speak as they wish

And men must simply tiptoe and endure.

Indeed yes, women are treasures.

(To this you respond, “Yes, you/we are!”)

But do’s and don’ts are simply suggestions

Proceed with caution,

You know what they say about a woman’s scorn.

Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)

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post a comment!


Jan 29 @ 9:35PM  
It does read more like prose than poetry but what you have to say there is very valid and well said.

Jan 29 @ 9:47PM  
I like this... it's insightful. You've taken time to observe and to observe well... a vital part of the conundrum we know as the mystery of communication with the opposite sex.

A green hockey puck is sliding your way. Keep writing!

Jan 29 @ 10:02PM  
Very nice. I can tell a lot of thought was put into that piece. Here is a greenie.

Jan 29 @ 10:09PM  
Ladies share your load for today

Jan 29 @ 11:14PM  
Cute. I'm sure you don't like that word, but cute.

Jan 30 @ 2:36AM  
I agree with Skwirl...this piece does seem more prose-like than poetry. I also agree with should keep're quite talented. I really liked this piece a lot. Leaving you a greenie.

Jan 30 @ 8:49AM  
women may speak as they wish and men must tip toe.......Sounds like blogs on here! lol!

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The Art of Speaking to a "Lady"