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What It REALLY Means......

posted 1/14/2010 7:14:53 PM |
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tagged: fuck, funny, sunshine
  Sunshine79

........ ........... ........... .......... ......... .... .

"I can't find it," REALLY MEANS, "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."

"That's women's work," REALLY MEANS, "It's dirty, difficult and thankless."

"Will you marry me?" REALLY MEANS, "Both my roommates have moved out, I can't find the washer, and there is no more peanut butter."

"It's a guy thing," REALLY MEANS, "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."

"Can I help with dinner?" REALLY MEANS, "Why isn't it already on the table?"

"It would take too long to explain," REALLY MEANS, "I have no idea how it works."

"I'm getting more exercise lately," REALLY MEANS, "The batteries in the remote are dead."

"We're going to be late," REALLY MEANS, "Now I have a legitimate excuse to drive like a maniac."

"Take a break, honey, you're working too hard," REALLY MEANS, "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

"That's interesting, dear," REALLY MEANS, "Are you still talking?"

"Honey, we don't need material things to prove our love," REALLY MEANS, "I forgot our anniversary again."

"It's really a good movie," REALLY MEANS, "It's got guns, knives, fast cars, and good looking women."

"You know how bad my memory is," REALLY MEANS, "I remember the words to the theme song of "F Troop", the address of the first girl I kissed, the Vehicle Identification Number of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."

"Oh, don't fuss. I just cut myself. It's no big deal," REALLY MEANS, "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt."

"I do help around the house," REALLY MEANS, "I once threw a dirty towel near the laundry basket."

"What did I do this time?" REALLY MEANS, "What did you catch me doing?"

"She's one of the rabid feminists," REALLY MEANS, "She refused to make my coffee."

"I heard you," REALLY MEANS, "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."

"You really look terrific in that outfit," REALLY MEANS, "Please don't try on another outfit. I'm starving."

"I missed you," REALLY MEANS, "I can't find my sock drawer, the kids are hungry and we are out of toilet paper."

"I'm not lost. I know exactly where we are," REALLY MEANS, "No one will ever see us alive again."

"We share the housework," REALLY MEANS, "I make the messes. She cleans them up."

"I don't need to read the instructions," REALLY MEANS, "I am perfectly capable of messing it up without printed help."

......... ........... ............. ............ ......... ........

Anybody wanna fuck?

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Comments:

post a comment!

sugarnspice005

Jan 14 @ 7:19PM  
Those were good.


"We're going to be late," REALLY MEANS, "Now I have a legitimate excuse to drive like a maniac.

ksk72

Jan 14 @ 8:00PM  
"I can't find it," REALLY MEANS, "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
I hear that 10 times a day atleast




just did
1bunny629

Jan 15 @ 12:29AM  
I am thinking I should have kept my husband.....
StraddleMyNose

Jan 15 @ 3:21AM  
Loved these!
frank747

Jan 15 @ 7:25AM  
yepper, funny as hell, but lets face it not quite that accurate. gender jokes, raciest jokes, and all the others should not be taken seriously, but what the heck, i seem to be a little to serious today.
dmbchick420

Jan 15 @ 9:14AM  
I can relate to most of those

Especially this one....

"That's interesting, dear," REALLY MEANS, "Are you still talking?"

Except I'm the one that says, "That's interesting, dear."

This one too..

"I heard you," REALLY MEANS, "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."

My husband yacks about nothing sometimes, especially when he has to much vitamin M in his system.....

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What It REALLY Means......