If you really want to talk to me, to get to know me...when you first contact me do not include your IM information. I will not respond. I will not add you to my IM friends list. I will block you from contacting me again.
There is a reason I came here to find people to talk to. There is a reason this place allows you to send mail to each other. Yes it takes a long time to send anything in a venue like this. However, in a case like this you should only send something if it is worth taking a long time to do so.
After a while perhaps we can then move on to more convenient methods of communication.
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