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What's the funniest/most embarrassing thing that has happened to you on a date?

posted 11/6/2009 11:19:46 PM |
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  KitKat25

Okay guys and gals...I've been waiting for the dust to settle in Pervia so we could have a little fun. I'm ready to hear all those funny stories you have tucked away in your closets. The stories that embarrassed you the most on a date. The stories that made you laugh your ass off later after all was said and done. Time to bring 'em out and dust them off...it's show and tell time.

My story takes place in 1998. I had been talking with a truck driver over the phone for a couple of weeks. We finally decided to meet at a restaurant for dinner and then go for a movie afterwards. What I didn't know at the time was he had just arrived home from a week-long haul, and he was quite tired and behind on his sleep.

We had a lovely dinner and then decided to catch a Sean Connery/Catherine Zeta Jones movie at the theatre across the street. Approximately 30 minutes into the movie, I look over (because he's making so much noise) and he's fast asleep. Well, the story doesn't stop there...this guy could really snore...so loud in fact that everyone in the theatre was turning around to see who had fallen asleep in the middle of the movie. Of course, I slumped down in my seat and yes, I even thought about leaving the theatre (do you blame me?!) but in the end, I nudged him awake and asked him if he wanted to leave. I was freakin' prepared to kill him if he said "no"! So we left and rescheduled the date for another evening when he was better rested. And no, I'm happy to say he didn't fall asleep during our second date. To this day, I laugh my ass off every time I think about this date.

Your turn...

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What's the funniest/most embarrassing thing that has happened to you on a date?
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Comments:

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1bunny629

Nov 6 @ 11:26PM  
that's so cute...I couldn't possib;y tell you my rendition of am embarassing date. Lucky for me, I don't get embarassed anymore.
soft_touch938

Nov 6 @ 11:32PM  
I haven't had any embarrassing dates but I've been embarrassed over some of the guys I dated.....
KitKat25

Nov 6 @ 11:48PM  
I couldn't possib;y tell you my rendition of am embarassing date.

Come on bunny...spill the beans. You know you want to.
somnium

Nov 6 @ 11:53PM  
I really can't think of any em-bare-ass'ng dates and I've been thinking about it for a few minutes now! Sowwy, no goodies at this time- maybe later if I think of sumth'n!


1bunny629

Nov 6 @ 11:59PM  
Right now I am trying to figure out why my spelling is so bad...or are my pc keys sticky? hmmm...embarassing moments??? Do ya wanna know about the night I fucked 3 of the guys on the UTK wrestling team and the bed was slung across the room, or the time my boyfriends parents caught us fucking on the golf course, or the nude model I got caught naked with at his aunts house, or the time I came out of the basement so dirty I couldn't explain to the bar manager what I had been doing with one of the football players down there....hmmmm...whatelse, I am sure there is more....that was just in the early 70's...maybe soon I will work my way into the nineties? ...oh yeah...some guys stole my clothes when I was fucking their roomate...ha! I still have the sweater I borrowed to wear home the next day....year 78.
StraddleMyNose

online now!
Nov 7 @ 12:34AM  
Back in August 2004, I had some 22 year old chick driving from Indiana to meet me. She pased my house on a major highway and turned around at Pizza Hut right up the street from me. Well, as she started back this way she was going the wrong way on my street with cars coming up on her. Well, she ended up passing my house again and almost got hit by a few cars to when she finally got off the street up into someone's driveway. All this time I was on the phone with her as she passed my house the first time. She finally made her way back up this way and finally parked along the street. She said that she was having an anxiety attack (she's been known to have those a lot in her life) and wanted to sit in her car for a few minutes before getting out. Felt bad for the girl at the time.

Another one is mack in march 2006 when I met someone off POF. She ended up falling asleep briefly after taking some of her meds as she sat on my couch after having gone out before that. She wasn't asleep all that long however. She really wasn't my type, even though I went out with her again one more time before I decided to end it with her.
ThePurpleProphet

Nov 7 @ 1:00AM  
I don't know if you call it a date or an escapade. I had a girlfriend that was a borderline nympho. We were always getting caught, mostly by her brother. One time we were in my car doing it on the front seat parked in front of her house. The windows were all fogged up and low and behold her mom opened the car door to find me humping her daughter. Her mom yelled at us and said in the house both of you and slammed the car door. My girlfriend made me finish her off before we went in.
lkg4action

Nov 7 @ 2:04AM  
Really couldn't call it a date but many years ago when I use to run the bars shooting pool with my youngest brother we were not only know for pool but also for liking to dance with the ladies. This was a small bar that we went to often and knew almost everyone that came in. On this night when we got there there was two ladies siting at the end of the bar where it curled back around to the wall. The light was dim in that part of the bar and from what I could see and yes the bar was not well lit in that area and we had won playing for beer so when a good song came up on the box my brother and me decided we ask them to dance. So of course I picked the blond and ask her across the bar if she would like to dance. She said yes and to my surprise when she came around the bar she was a foot taller than me and just a big women! Not that I don't like dancing with big ladies the problem was this was a fast dance and as soon as we hit the dance floor she just grabed me in a bear hug nearly sqeezed the breath out of me and slow danced with me and no my feet were not touching the floor until the song ended! Politely thanked her for the dance and decided to go try my luck on the table at the bar up the street!
KitKat25

Nov 7 @ 2:55AM  
Do ya wanna know about the night I fucked 3 of the guys on the UTK wrestling team and the bed was slung across the room, or the time my boyfriends parents caught us fucking on the golf course, or the nude model I got caught naked with at his aunts house, or the time I came out of the basement so dirty I couldn't explain to the bar manager what I had been doing with one of the football players down there

bunny: I'm so Disney compared to you! Any one of these stories would fit the blog. You choose...

Som: Oh puleeezzz...put on your thinking cap man! Everyone has at least one embarrassing date/romantic story tucked away in their past.

Straddle: Yeah, it's kind of a red flag when your date can't even keep their eyes open. Trust me...I completely understand.

PP: LMAO...talk about a family affair.

Not that I don't like dancing with big ladies the problem was this was a fast dance and as soon as we hit the dance floor she just grabed me in a bear hug nearly sqeezed the breath out of me and slow danced with me and no my feet were not touching the floor until the song ended!

lkg4action: That's too funny! I could almost picture you with your legs swinging from side-to-side like a rag doll. Well, at least you got to dance with a beautiful woman.
ShadowMale

Nov 7 @ 4:26AM  
Well... its pretty embaressing. You see, I'm dyslexic.

I once put it in backwards.
Bitch still had the nerve to ask if it was in yet?

No, seriously though, I was with this girl, and things was getting good and hot. Got undressed, and i reached down and fingered her to get her wet before I put it in, and she asks, "is it in yet?" I looked up at her with a confused look, and with a disappointed look on her faces asks, "is that it?" I said no... that's my finger. As I later found out, you could have landed a C130 transport in there and turned around.
Detach

Nov 7 @ 7:10AM  
On one particular outing, my date and I hit the dance floor. I always enjoy ending the songs by dipping my date. However, when I went to dip her this time, one of her boobs fell free from her dress and plopped out where everyone could see it.
Wordsofwit

Nov 7 @ 8:10AM  
Good blog, Kat. Here is a green thingie. I have many but only provide a couple.

When I was 16 I was taking my girlfriend to a dance at the country club her father was a member of. After parking the car upon arrival, I went around to her side, opened the door, she stepped out, I closed the door catching the bottom of her dress as she stepped forward. Rriiipppp! We were both crimson and people were laughing. We went home and she put on another dress but it remained a topic of humor through out the evening.

While working at the Dallas Convention Center, a chunk of a Hershey bar fell into the seat of my chair unbeknownst to me. I was wearing tan dockers and sat on it and it melted into the seat of pants at a strategically perfect place so as to appear to be something entirely different. I went around most of the day this way including making a presentation to clients. Nobody ever said a word to me about it but I did notice a lot of smirks. I didn't discover what was funny until I went to the restroom and looked down at my pants around my ankles while sitting on the pot.


selectusername

Nov 7 @ 9:12AM  
What is this strange word, "date" ?

Damn, Bunny was a wild woman!!
1bunny629

Nov 7 @ 9:18AM  
shit Select...I have tried it all...but yanno...I really don't get embarrassed, so these moments I have had aren't really a good source for this blog, but I have more nonetheless....
NightOfOld

Nov 7 @ 9:33AM  


After a wild night of partying, My girlfriend and I are wakened by 4 police officers
shining flashlights in our faces. We were both naked in a sleeping bag with our clothes in a pile 5 feet away. We were in the middle of the city park right next to
the police station. They made us get out, get dressed, and go home.
Wordsofwit

Nov 7 @ 9:42AM  
A girl and I got busted by a cop on lovers lane. He shined the flashlight in the car and was questioning me and it became visibly obvious to him, her, and myself that I had a long public hair stuck in my teeth.
earthquake501

Nov 7 @ 10:56AM  
I had gone to a family Christmas Dinner where one of the dishes was candied yams. I love them, but really get gassy later. Soon after I got home, my girlfriend called and invited me down. It was late when I got there and soon found out the she was horney as hell. We wound up in bed and just as I was cumming, I started farting at the same time.
lunanegra

Nov 7 @ 11:37AM  
Thinking...

Well,I'll have to come back with some when I remember. I tend to repress horrid and shitty memories with good reason,lol
Sunshine79

Nov 7 @ 11:45AM  
I fell in the mud......lost my pants for the rest of the evening, lol
somnium

Nov 7 @ 11:55AM  
Ok... one part of this experience is funny! I was at my girlfriends house who was separated, getting a divorce from her hubby btw- we were in her bedroom gett'n it on, when her hubby knocked on her door! She threw on her nightgown and I grabbed my cloths, went into the bathroom, put my cloths on, except for pulling my pants up and sat on the toilet to make it look like I was taking a dump!

For some stupid reason, she let him in (her house). Next thing, he opened the bathroom door and looked at me for a few seconds and shut the door! When I came out, I walked past him and he says: "tough guy eh?" LOL He outweighed me probably by 75 lbs, if not more!

She was sitting on her couch so I sat down on it! He was bitching at her and started to get a little rough, whereupon she kicked him! I stood up to put a stop to it, fully expecting to get into blows- then he stopped and walked towards the door! On his way out he said "I'd like to beat the crap otta you!" I said, "what good would it do you?" He said "it would make me feel better!" So I said, for a little bit but then I'd sue you for assault and battery!" at that point, he left!

Then we got on with what we were doing, after being so rudely interrupted! I mean damn... it's not polite to interrupt a couple when the pokeor, is just about to slide into home base with the pokee! How rude!

Never again, will I hook up with a lady who is separated! Could have gotten nasty!

shewolf53

Nov 7 @ 4:48PM  
This happened in my own apartment in NYC. My boyfriend and I were in the middle of having sex when I happened to look up and there stood all of the other band members who had decided it was a good time to talk about a new song. After that I made sure none of them still had keys to my apartment.
KitKat25

Nov 7 @ 4:57PM  
You see, I'm dyslexic. I once put it in backwards. Bitch still had the nerve to ask if it was in yet?

ShadowMale: I hate it when that happens! LOL

when I went to dip her this time, one of her boobs fell free from her dress and plopped out where everyone could see it.

Detach: Yes, that's what happens when a lady is bigger than a c-cup...her boobs can go in the opposite direction if she moves too fast. LMAO

WoW: You're like one of those disaster magnets aren't you?! I can't believe this is just some of your red faced moments. No wonder you have such tough skin. I tried to picture you talking to a cop with a pubic hair in your teeth...Gawd! The chocolate pants story was a close second.

Night: Didn't you know you're not supposed to get all wild next to a police station?! Oh well, live and learn right?

We wound up in bed and just as I was cumming, I started farting at the same time.

earthquake501: Talk about an explosive moment!

I fell in the mud......lost my pants for the rest of the evening

Sunshine: So, you ran around in your panties for the rest of the evening? Details woman!

Som: I can't believe you stayed! A lot of the guys I've know would have high tailed it out the nearest window. That's...ummm...dedication man.

bunny: Since you won't pick...I will pick. I want to hear the story about the naked male model...even if it no longer embarrasses you...it did at one time. Come on woman...details!
sugarnspice005

Nov 7 @ 7:06PM  
I wouldn't call this a date, mainly because I was living with Mick at the time. But, anyway....it was early morning, and I was woken up to this wonderful sensation of being licked, and when I fully woke up, Mick was busy licking away and I was full aroused. So, he and I were going at it pretty heavy, we didn't hear his mother getting up. She used a walker, so, when she was coming up the hallway, we would hear her. Not this time. And of all nights, we had left the bedroom door open. She hadn't been feeling well the night before, so Mick had left the door open so he could hear her if she cried out. Anyway, his Mom is coming up the hallway, notices the door open, looks in to say "good morning", and saw more than she wanted to see.

Mick, being Mick, thought it was funny. I was too embarrassed to go face her for most of the morning. It was almost noon before I ventured out of the bedroom. She made some kind of joke about it...can't remember exactly what she said, but it was something about putting a bell on her walker so we could hear her over the moans and groans.
aftershox

Nov 7 @ 7:30PM  
I was on top once, decided to hold on to the head board for more control and balance. This was an mid to upscale motel, and the head board appeared to be very solid. But it was glued to the wall and suddenly came unglued.

I rolled off and couldn't stop laughing. I broke the fuckin' headboard! Fortunately , we had pretty much had our fun and were into his 2nd or 3rd time around.

And no, we didn't tell anyone at the front desk when we checked out.
KitKat25

Nov 7 @ 8:15PM  
Shewolf: Holy smokes! I would have turned at least 10 different shades of red. Oh, and I would have grabbed all their keys as well. I can't believe they stood over you instead of discreetly leaving the apartment. Yep, this is definitely one of those really embarrassing moments that you laugh your ass of about later.

Sugar: I agree with Mick's mom...she needs to wear a bell. LOL

Shoxie: LMAO!! Okay...that's one funny story! Oh, and I would have checked out of the hotel too without telling them about the broken headboard. They should know their furniture needs to withstand vigorous sex...I mean really.
ThePurpleProphet

Nov 7 @ 9:12PM  
Another one came to mind. It had been a full year since I had graduated and I had been going out with this girl for about a month. She ask me if I could take her to the prom. I said sure. We're all dressed up and looking nice.

We pull up in the parking lot of the school and it's a middle school. I swear the girl looked a whole lot older than she was. I went along to the dance with her but told her I couldn't continue seeing after I found she was only 14.

The funny thing was I met both of her parents and they knew how old I was and they didn't say a thing about it. She looked at lease 17. It's a good thing I never tried to put the moves to her.
mark995

Nov 8 @ 12:19AM  
Sup kit kat im takin your advice and talkin on your blogs. Well my ex-girlfriend and I were always sexual, whether outside on Emory campus, or where ever, Even in our college school in the team rooms.Well anyway, we had sex up to 40+ times for about 51/2 yrs. And thing is MANY times was w/o a condom.. So thing is when I got ready to cum, the only time I would do so was in her, anal other than that it was either on her or shoot off on her blanket, If it was about to be a close call. Or I was just paralyzed from an intense orgasm. Well one day the dreaded laundry day came around.
And well everything was fine I helped her with the laundry...... but then we notied something wasnt right. the throw over blanket was dark crimson red. And well when cum dries it shows up VERY well on dark colors especially pants. As some of you guys can witness to when your lady has an earge and decides to pull you in a changing room, alley, and your pants are just low enough to pull it out. And ya have ta quickly tuck it back in b4 being caught. Well anyway... on the blanket ya can see all the "history" of our past. And the under blanket, that had ablood stain on it almost the width of a basketball. We had to STUFF IT ALL INTO THE WASHING MACHINE!! Before anyone took a good glance. And let me tell you the blanket wasnt the only thing that was dark red.
Sunshine79

Nov 8 @ 8:10AM  
Sunshine: So, you ran around in your panties for the rest of the evening? Details woman!

I went on a date with a guy muddin'. I was supposed to stay clean. I some how managed to fall in the mud and covered myself in it. I ended up having to take my pants off. I ended up driving home that way too. Praying to god that I didn't get pulled over. At one point I got lost and I had to pee so bad. It was like 3am and no one was around, no street lights, just corn fields. I was scared shitless. Thanks to my love of scary movies, I'm thinkin' at any minute some Children of the Corn shit is gonna happen. I put my high beams on and got out, left the car door open and went and peed in front of the headlights, lol I swear, I never been so scared. I got home safely.....lol Boy, what a nite.
lunanegra

Nov 8 @ 2:46PM  
Well, I wrote a blog about my bad sex experiences, but I guess embarrassing dates and sex stories have overlapped.

Hm, well this was a few years ago in my first apartment. I was casually dating this guy who I knew a year before. Anyway, that night, I invited him over and the sex was wonderful as usual and was going to get better when we switched from missionary to doggy. Unbeknownst to both of us, I uh...managed to get an air bubble in my ladypurse- so when he turned me around for rear entry and was fixing to penetrate..I uh.."queefed" on him so loudly, he backed into my dresser in surprise, disgust and shock. He probably thought I farted on him, but I'm sure it was air from my pussy from the way we had sex; he was going to town like no tomorrow,so...

Nothing says "boner kill" than a woman with a bodily function. I couldnt coax him back after that, and so the night was ruined.
KitKat25

Nov 8 @ 7:44PM  
Prophet: OMG...talk about an uncomfortable evening!

Mark995: Oh my...

Sunshine: Holy crap! I was thinking Children of the Corn too before you even mentioned it in your comment. Scary stuff woman! It's still awfully funny.

Nothing says "boner kill" than a woman with a bodily function.

Lune: Amen to that statement! It's cuz we're not suppose to fart.

Thanks so much to everyone who took a chance and shared their stories with me. I had so much fun reading them. Hopefully, you had just as much fun sharing them. Kudos to you all!
dmbchick420

Nov 9 @ 8:54AM  
Sorry...I ain't got no silly stories (that are coming to me brain).....I'm no fun

Looking4ever

Nov 9 @ 9:52AM  
This was when I was a senior in high school...

I met this guy and some of his friends (with me and some of mine) at the base (my father was in the military) bowling alley. We kept hanging out together for several weeks when one of them asked me out on a date. He had a rather flashy car that he was rather proud of and kept parking it illegally at work. On the Friday that we were going to go out, he got called into his superior's office and got chewed out and written up (a pretty good offense for a young airman) because of parking his car illegally at work.

Later that evening (it was early...we were going to dinner) he comes to my house to pick me up and my father, still in uniform, answers the door. "Airman ***, what are you doing here?" "Apparently I have a date with YOUR daughter." It never even dawned on me that my dad was a mucky muck and that this guy worked with my dad...never mind being his superior and writing him up. To me he was just my dad.

Needless to say, it was a very short date...and the only one I ever had with the guy
dirtywhiteboy34

Nov 11 @ 3:03AM  
Ok....I've been actually racking my brain trying to think of some embarrassing date moment....not really a date, but here goes.
When I was about 27.....and still rather decent looking....I hadn't been a driver very long. About 2 yrs by that time...I managed to sweet talk this gorgeous young 19 yo girl into coming on the road with me for a while...I used to be a pretty smooth talker, and that, with the help of her being pissed off at her husband (who was drunk and acting stupid) was enough to actually pull it off.
So...we head out on a 3 week adventure...having fun...no strings...having a blast. Well, it came time to shower one night, and she mentioned that she'd always wanted to have sex in the shower. I mentioned that the showers in these truck stops are rather thin. She didn't care. So....After a few minutes, I was bangin away in the floor of the shower with the hot water raining down on the both of us....her screaming louder with every stroke...(by that time, I didn't care either). I was knocking the bottom out of it good, too!
After few minutes of this, I became aware of rising water. It was then that I realized her ass was on top of the shower drain, but it was too late...we had flooded the place! We quickly finished up, got dressed, and tried to make a quick exit...only to discover we had had an audience the whole time because of her noise.
We walked out of the place as dignified as possible to the applause of about 15 people!
Embarrassing enough for ya? Not yet....the truck stop actually sent a statement of damages to my trucking company asking them to pay for the repairs! I had to explain to my supervisor how I managed to cause over $3000 damage to a truckstop in Seguin,Tx.
I'll probably never see Kelly again, but if I do, we'll probably both enjoy a good laugh!
Nathanial

Nov 20 @ 6:49PM  
Well...the night before easter of 08, the date was coming to an end with some girl i had decided to try to date, and we were about to part ways after i dropped her off at her car. We both went into the gas station, she because she needed cigs, and me because I wanted a really nive knife. They usually don't come already sharpened, but this one did...but didn't come with a sheath, so I stuck it in my inside coat pocket. It was still slushy out, and piles of snow everywhere, and to get back to my car, I had to walk up a snowy bank. Well, like an idiot I was wearing smooth bottomed boots, and slipped and fell right back down the hill. When I got to the bottom, my right arm was numb as heck, so I slowly got up and tried to move it, and got my pantleg all wet, with Gawd only knows what. So I hobble over to her jeep cuz she asked if I was ok. I lift my arm to show her its feelin a bit funny, and blood sprays all over her dress , which happened to be white, and onto her driver's seat. apparently the knife had fallen out of my pocket, and stuck through my arm, and into my ribs. She screamed and started to run into the gas station log cabin mc donalds, with me following trying to tell her i was ok, and didnt need an ambulance. I ended up losing about 3 pints of blood in 20 minutes, and another half pint on the way to the hospital. I'm pretty sure her dress was ruined, and her seat...well...at least it was already red. She never called the next day, or even sent me a text...I think I kinda scared her off.......that was embarrasing. I had to help carry a casket the next day....damn that hurt. And now my arm looks funny because one of the muscles kinda got cut loose from the rest of my arm, and sticks out pretty far when im usin my arms....gets a lot of people askin weird questions...

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What's the funniest/most embarrassing thing that has happened to you on a date?