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Cold Day in Hell - The Temperature of Hell

posted 9/23/2009 5:18:57 PM |
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  KitKat25

This was forwarded to me by a friend. I don't know if it's already been posted here, but I thought it was worth taking the chance. Enjoy!

HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term.

The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+

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Comments:

post a comment!

bobbierob

Sep 23 @ 5:25PM  
I LOVE this !!!!!!!!!!
sugarnspice005

Sep 23 @ 5:34PM  
I've never seen this one before.

That was good!!!!

here's a greenie for you!
RevDocLove

Sep 23 @ 5:46PM  
ROTFLMMAO
You now have one more little green cowpie!
Ewe_Wish

Sep 23 @ 6:53PM  
PinkToeNails

Sep 23 @ 6:58PM  
That was awesome!!!!!!!




Thanks for sharing! I'd never heard it!
zena343

Sep 23 @ 8:02PM  
LMAO!!
shewolf53

Sep 23 @ 8:28PM  
But what about the religions that do not have hell as part of their beliefs?
KitKat25

Sep 23 @ 10:10PM  
But what about the religions that do not have hell as part of their beliefs?

waynuckingfutz

Sep 23 @ 10:26PM  
I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.
Huh?

lar65

Sep 23 @ 10:59PM  
Sorry, I couldn't help but read. I am a chemist and had the same question on a quantum theory test as extra credit. The correct answer according to Irwin Schrodinger is that you can never know the temperature of an object before you measure it. The reason is, that by measuring the object (using a thermometer or other device) will change even if ever so slightly the temperature of that object so you can never know what is was to begin with. This is also tied in to the uncertainty princepal. LOVE BEING A RANDOM NERD
somnium

Sep 23 @ 11:19PM  
I enjoyed reading your blog- very good!

A green pumpkin coming your way!


flavorbuster

Sep 23 @ 11:22PM  
All I know is Hell hath no fury like a womans scorn...
Ewe_Wish

Sep 24 @ 9:13AM  
All I know is Hell hath no fury like a womans scorn.
Damn, I did teach you something.....................





LOVE BEING A RANDOM NERD

Nerds can be sexy..............
max49

Sep 24 @ 9:37AM  
Good answer.
Wordsofwit

Sep 24 @ 9:48AM  
I had never seen it.
KitKat25

Sep 24 @ 2:18PM  
The correct answer according to Irwin Schrodinger is that you can never know the temperature of an object before you measure it. The reason is, that by measuring the object (using a thermometer or other device) will change even if ever so slightly the temperature of that object so you can never know what is was to begin with. This is also tied in to the uncertainty princepal.

Your answer is Interesting. This is one of those questions where you don't know if there really is a correct answer...or if the prof just wants you to make an ass out of yourself by seeing what kind of B.S. you can come up with...or how creative you can actually make the B.S. sound.

LOVE BEING A RANDOM NERD


I agree with Ewe...nerds can be very sexy.

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Cold Day in Hell - The Temperature of Hell