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Confused on something

posted 9/3/2009 12:41:00 PM |
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  McBunman

When I was single some of my married friends would tell me that women hit on them more after they were married. I always thought it was an old wives tale, something married guys imagined so they had something to fantasize about while they were talking to their wives. But now I have noticed this is actually true. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m no Brad Pitt and I’m not trying to act like I have to knock them away with a stick. Believe me. But sometimes a woman that wouldn’t have even talked to me when I was single will flirt with me and sometimes pretty blatantly come on to me. I’m wondering what the hell this is about? Is it because I’m safe, they know because I’m taken I won’t act on it? Do I have the smell of commitment on me and that makes me more attractive to them? Is it a competition with some? And before I get ripped this is a tiny minority of women we are talking about here, so I’m not making any general assumptions. I just find it kind of strange.

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Comments:

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Ewe_Wish

Sep 3 @ 12:46PM  
First of all ..............since your married..............wanna fuck?

There is a type of women out there that find men in relationships or married more attractive than single men...........and some of them do flirt with you because you are safe and wont act on it.................sadly a lot of times its because of low self esteem issues.........so they flirt with the man who is "taken" in hopes he will leave the one he is with for her...........to prove to herself that she is worthy......or more special (beautiful, sexy or whatever) than the woman he was originally with.

The sad part is.......once she has taken him away...........she will drop him at some point..........because now it proves nothing..........and she goes on to her next victim..........I mean man..........
sugarnspice005

Sep 3 @ 12:54PM  
I agree with what Ewe said, and I want to add to that. There are also women who see that ring as a "challenge" and will set out to win the man over to show they can do so. Cold? Yes, I will say it is. It ties in with that low self esteem. Then there are those who just want what is "forbidden".
max49

online now!
Sep 3 @ 12:58PM  
Yeah I thought I had found that to be true one time but after her boy friend hit me up side the head and told me she wasn't winking at me that she had something in her eye I realized it was all in my head.
Ewe_Wish

Sep 3 @ 1:01PM  
Y
eah I thought I had found that to be true one time but after her boy friend hit me up side the head and told me she wasn't winking at me that she had something in her eye I realized it was all in my head.
You just hang in there slugger................pretend your married...........they will come in flocks.
max49

online now!
Sep 3 @ 1:07PM  
Once is emough.
dmbchick420

Sep 3 @ 1:54PM  
I agree with Ewe also.

I just wanna say that I cannot stand women OR men that have affairs with married people. It simply disgusts me. There are plenty of single fish in the sea that are not taken.

Before anyone says it (or thinks it), yes I'm married and I have NEVER done anything behind his back and it won't ever happen. I just don't believe in that sort of thing.
Wordsofwit

Sep 3 @ 2:13PM  
May be they don't feel that they need to own a pig to get some sausage.
McBunman

Sep 3 @ 3:06PM  
May be they don't feel that they need to own a pig to get some sausage.

Wow! I said I'm no Brad Pitt, but that doesn't mean I'm Arnold Ziffel either.
casuallylooking

Sep 3 @ 6:07PM  
Wow! I said I'm no Brad Pitt, but that doesn't mean I'm Arnold Ziffel either.
I laughed so hard over this I almost peed my pants...........
I said almost..............

Leave it to Bruce to help your ego out there a bit..... lmao

I also agree with Ewe... some women just know no boundaries, or like trying to break them.
Wordsofwit

Sep 3 @ 6:20PM  
Wow! I said I'm no Brad Pitt, but that doesn't mean I'm Arnold Ziffel either.


That is hilarious and worth a kudo. Hell, if he was a member, I would not be surprised to see Arnold Ziffel say he is no WoW!!
KitKat25

Sep 4 @ 4:15AM  
I think this is very true. I've also heard both men and women refer to their wedding rings as a "babe magnets". Apparently, it is no longer hip to hide the ring...I guess you're suppose to cheat proudly for the whole world to see...and pretend you don't care.

Maybe they want to get caught so they can have great makeup sex.
lintroller

Sep 5 @ 2:49PM  
This is a pretty fascinating question. I think what you're perceiving is real to an extent, although I think has a woman has to be pathologically seductive to hit on a man who isn't sending out some sort of "hit on me" vibe (or vice versa). Still, though, most of us find it fun to flirt, and I think it happens among married people too, because it has the appearance of a safe environment where you can dip your toes into the fantasy pool without plunging in entirely. Also, when you're comfortable around someone because she's married, the irony is that you're increasingly likely to develop a connection nearly akin to the type that leads to a real relationship, which muddies the waters.

Honestly, I think it's only human when you meet someone attractive and interesting (and taken) to wonder on some level what things would be like if you were her partner. Most of us in relationships view feelings like that as reasons to demonstrate restraint; others view new objects of affection as challenges to be surmounted; still others confuse the new exciting feeling simulating courtship as love that supplants what one has with one's longtime partner, and I guess that's one of the ways in which affairs come about. Marriage counseling is a good option if things get to that latter point, because sometimes you need a disinterested third party to help you reaffirm your original love.

I think I digressed, but what else is new...

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Confused on something