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You know what I need

posted 9/1/2009 11:09:36 AM |
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  ThePurpleProphet

I've been thinking. And my head hurts like shit. Whatever shit hurts like.

Remember when we were kids and we had mud ball fights. Where we actually threw mud at each other. Those were the good old days.

The good old days, back where women knew their place in society. They wouldn't backtalk their man. The woman would just get us our damn beer and stand there until we had something else for them to do.

Vacuum during a football game, hell no. They knew better.

Then came a time where the women found out they could control us guys. They had something we wanted and they began to flaunt it. Jiggle it, and wiggle it front of our faces.

That was the equalizer.

I'm going to start a revolution. Men take a stand. Go into a womans special drawer and take all of her "toys" and out, then in a bag or a big box depending on the amount. Then run, run like hell. We will take back control of the world.

Weaken those women so they beg us for a temporary use of their own toys. Buzz, buzz, now bring me a beer and you can use you pocket rocket for two minutes. Rub my shoulder for an extra minute. Just stay away from the sensative nipples.

Once again it will be a mans world.

Now who is with me on this?

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Comments:

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Wordsofwit

Sep 1 @ 11:13AM  
Gee, I remember when somebody else had this screen name.
somnium

Sep 1 @ 11:26AM  
There's a fence between me and my neighbor! We've talked maybe three times over the fence. I don't think she would like me rifling through her dresser drawers, looking for 'toys' if she has any! Besides, she's much bigger than I am and could probably beat the shit otta me if she caught me!

NightOfOld

Sep 1 @ 11:42AM  


That just not right. I'm her Toy.

Ewe_Wish

Sep 1 @ 11:44AM  

Once again it will be a mans world

Hey i am all for it............but if your going to take part.........you take it all...........the monthly bullshit women go thru, the child bearing........PMS, Menopause.....

no vacumning thru the football game, but you go ahead and clean up the mess you and the "boys" made with your empty chip bags and empty beer cans...........us women are going to be going down and getting our nails and hair done so we can be pretty when you all are ready for us.................and our toys.........yep you come on over and take them............while your at it..........could you find a book about giving oral on a woman so you hit the right spot...........just once.................and hey the g spot does not stand for gee i missed it..................so I am ready for you to take back control..........just let me get the bon bons out and get the soaps on...........

ThePurpleProphet

Sep 1 @ 11:50AM  
Maybe we should treat each other as equals and share.

And I'm not just saying that to get you to let your shield down so I get steal your toys.
Ewe_Wish

Sep 1 @ 11:52AM  
And I'm not just saying that to get you to let your shield down so I get steal your toys
Oh sure your not just saying that..........i know you .........you just want to be my toy......... so i will pick up the empty beer cans after the game.............
ThePurpleProphet

Sep 1 @ 11:55AM  
Can I run my fingers through your wool? Rub your shoulders and back to help you relax? Put your feet on my lap, let rub them for you.
Ewe_Wish

Sep 1 @ 12:00PM  
Put your feet on my lap, let rub them for you.
all four of them?


and be careful where you run your fingers thru my wool............I'm just not that type of sheep.............but i sure could be......
ThePurpleProphet

Sep 1 @ 12:04PM  
Be careful Ewe. I'm wearing my wading boots. If your hind legs get inside of them you'll be stuck. And then I'll grab some wool and take you for a ride.

Whoops. A flashback from the days on the farm.
Ewe_Wish

Sep 1 @ 12:15PM  
Whoops. A flashback from the days on the farm.
You are a sick sick man..........one of your redeeming qualities that I happen to love about you.........
ThePurpleProphet

Sep 1 @ 12:20PM  
So now you are agreeing with the psychiatrist. Everyone is against me. NO, not the walls...closing in...help...I am normal...just ask me.
theSkwirl

Sep 1 @ 1:13PM  
*polishes a pair of captive buckeyes and contemplates the statement above*
ThePurpleProphet

Sep 1 @ 1:36PM  
Hey that tickles. You forgot that you gave them back.
theSkwirl

Sep 1 @ 1:45PM  
Yeah but I just stole em back! Hahahahahaha.... mine mine MINE!!!
casuallylooking

Sep 1 @ 2:11PM  
Ladies, I am 45 minutes from Columbus Airport.... although I can make the trip a lot quicker than that if need be... and Purp is 5 minutes from Columbus Airport.....

Soooo, who would like a freshly picked set of.........purple buckeyes?

Don't worry, Purp... I'll leave you some Tylenol for your headache.
somnium

Sep 1 @ 2:25PM  
just let me get the bon bons out and get the soaps on...........

Okay Peggy Bundy- whatever makes you happy!


ThePurpleProphet

Sep 1 @ 2:28PM  
Okay, okay, I'll be a good boy. Dang Causual, I was just playin.
zaralyon

Sep 1 @ 5:23PM  
CL, i'd love them purple buckeyes, simpley because he had the audacity to even think about stealing my toys!

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You know what I need