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A new pilot is in the planning stage for next season

posted 8/24/2009 2:24:15 PM |
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  somnium

This one is called: Mole Manor! Sound familiar? Well, I've seen a program on TV a few times called: Meerkat Manor! For those unfamiliar with that program, it's about a colony of Meerkats, with names and their trial and tribulations on a daily basis!

Same is true of the pilot Mole Manor! The difference is: the Meerkats territory is set in open plains, while the Moles territory is set in my freak'n backyard and sometimes in my front yard!

There are differences between the two species! The Meerkats are cute, furry little rodents that burrough into the ground for safety and come out to feed and deal with colony problems. The Moles are furless, all but blind little critters that 'see' with their whisker like feelers at the end of their noses! They also use their feelers to locate food! Strong too! They're very sneaky PHUCKERS! They burrough under ground all over the place! They also leave large PHUCKING mounds of dirt, wherever they poke their PHUCKING little heads above ground, making it bumpy when cutting the grass on a tractor/mower, in what I can only describe, as a 'ball smacking' grass cutting experience! I hate those little PHUCKERS! In some places, my lawn looks like it has what I'll call: 'lawn measles'!

I've read about ways to eliminate them using poisons, gas, drowning them and annoying them away with devices you can push into the ground that emit high-pitched sound waves! There's pros and cons about these devices!

I have a transformer that can develop up to 9,000+ volts! I'm thinking of pushing metal stakes into the ground where they've been, hooking up the transformer and giving them the biggest PHUCKING thrill of their lives! I'll have to move the stakes around my backyard, to cover it all! I'd love nothing better to see those little PHUCKERS, rocket out of their burroughs straight up, with their tiny little PHUCKING feet, flailing in the air as they hit the ground either fried or taking off at warp speed, never to come back!

Has anyone ever had problems with moles in you lawn and if so, were you successful in getting rid of them??

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Comments:

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Dione

Aug 24 @ 3:52PM  
This is so phucking funny! It reminds me of Bill Murray in the movie Groundhog Day.
Dione

Aug 24 @ 3:53PM  
Disclaimer: I am not a member of PITA, but I would watch my back if I were you. Here's a green punkin.
ksk72

Aug 24 @ 4:00PM  


I watch Meerkat Manor sometimes...my son likes it
shewolf53

Aug 24 @ 4:12PM  
Not sure if anyone has ever won a battle with moles or fire ants. Here the battle is uually with hornets and fire ants and those damn racoons who are just too smart when it comes to getting the trashcan open and the squirrels who have figured out how to take the covers off the vents to get under the house when it rains.
shewolf53

Aug 24 @ 4:13PM  
Not sure if anyone has ever won a battle with moles or fire ants. Here the battle is uually with hornets and fire ants and those damn racoons who are just too smart when it comes to getting the trashcan open and the squirrels who have figured out how to take the covers off the vents to get under the house when it rains.
sugarnspice005

Aug 24 @ 4:31PM  
Good luck. Those little buggars are a bitch to get rid of.
RevDocLove

Aug 24 @ 6:02PM  
The only time I had a problem with moles is when I
had my international security business operating
Fire ants..Go to the KMart garden dept. and get a bag of fire ant killer..
Worked for me.
PinkToeNails

Aug 24 @ 6:09PM  
I don't have moles but I do have voles and they've eaten every effing hosta I had in my yard... I probably had 75 varieties and I have about 3 left My cats catch them but now that the hostas are gone, I don't have much problem with them anymore..! You can get something called a Sonic Mole Chaser but they are pretty long and have to be buried a certain depth....
You can try dropping moth balls into their tunnels but they'll only tunnel somewhere else.

Good luck with them!!
Dione

Aug 24 @ 9:57PM  
Would you rather have prairie dogs instead? I think they are probably the closest animal in the U.S. to merekats, but they are much smaller. However, they dig, burrow and build some impressive dwellings... think of it as a colony and you are the head honcho!
somnium

Aug 24 @ 10:08PM  
Would you rather have prairie dogs instead?
Prairie dogs, meerkats and moles in my mind are rodents- one is naked, the other two are not!


wstang69

Aug 24 @ 10:59PM  
if you try the sonic chasers .. you are going to need at least 4. I have 2 at the corners of the house. they stay about 30 to 50 feet away from them, but tunnel over rest of the front yard. Let me know if you have any luck with them.
casuallylooking

Aug 25 @ 5:00AM  
Nope, no idea how to get rid of them other than moth balls, and as already stated, they will just dig another hole for each one you put a moth ball into.

Good luck though...

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A new pilot is in the planning stage for next season