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Fatal Online Dating Errors

posted 7/18/2009 9:22:08 PM |
1 kudogive kudos what's this?
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tagged: dating
  ThomasDaCat

Now, last time this feline posted something he found online, he nearly lost one of his kitty lives, but since I still have a few left, I'm gonna post these nifty things I just found.

Top 10 email turnoffs for women
1. Don't ask her how much she weighs or what her measurements are. You might as well just tell her you only want to sleep with her and you have no interest in getting to know her, because that's what she's going to think if you ask her this.

2. Don't email her seven times asking her why she hasn't responded to your first email. Women get far more email than men do, so you need to be patient.
“Instead of harassing her, relax and be confident that she's going to respond to you." Instead of harassing her, relax and be confident that she's going to respond to you.

3. Don't ask her how many other dates she's been on from the site. How many other dates someone has been on is not important. What is important is finding out whether the two of you click when you hang out.

4. Don't send her a nasty email if she hasn't responded to you after several emails. It's her prerogative whether or not she desires to be in contact with you. If she doesn't want to meet you, why get angry and nasty? There are plenty of other women out there who you can contact.

5. Don't ask her if she wants to have sex with you on the second email exchange, and don't send her dirty pictures of you. Women are all about connecting with their minds. Just because you're looking for a quick fling, that doesn't mean she's going to respond.

6. If she gives you her phone number, don't wait a week to call her. By extension, if you do wait a week to call her and she doesn't call you back, don't be shocked. Women have many options online. If she gives you her phone number, I suggest calling her that day. It keeps the momentum going.

7. When asking for more pictures, do so without any references to "Can you please send me a picture so I can see your body?" “Ask her if she'd like to exchange more pictures” Ask her if she'd like to exchange more pictures, which means you send some and she sends some. Several women have complained to me that men ask them to send pictures of themselves in bikinis or other such things, so that men can see their body. Men, don't do this!

8. Don't get offended if she doesn't want to talk to you on the phone right away and/or wants to talk to you via email first to get to know you. You need to be flexible and open to her suggestions. Sometimes you may need to email back and forth for a week, and sometimes she'll give you her phone number right away. Either way, don't be rude.

9. Do not email-stalk her. Many of my clients who are single women have complained to me about men who will email them several times a day for three weeks, until they are forced to block emails from those men. Men, she got your email the very first time. She just may have chosen not to open it. By sending emails several times a day, not only are you turning her off, you're freaking her out! You've become an online stalker. That's a guarantee she'll never go out with you.

10. Don't send cut-and-paste emails. When connecting with her for the very first time, don't cut and paste an email message in July that you've been sending out for six months with a tagline that says, "I love the holidays." By doing that, she knows you didn't read her profile - and that you're really, really lazy!

Continued below.........................

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ThomasDaCat

Jul 18 @ 9:24PM  
Here are the 14 biggest online dating mistakes women make:

1. Stop posting four different photos from four different stages in your life. This leaves a man wondering, "Who is this person?" I've looked through thousands of online profiles, and the majority of women will put up pictures from different stages of their life but not put up current pictures. All photos that you post on an online dating profile MUST BE CURRENT!!! He's going to find out what you look like when you meet, and there is no reason to lie about your looks.

2. Don't list your dislikes about Internet dating in bold, capital letters at the beginning of your profile. We've all had negative experiences online. Emphasize your positive points, not your negative ones.

3. List your exact body type. It seems like on the Internet EVERYBODY is "athletic and toned," "petite" or "fit and trim." “He will find out what you look like!”
He will find out what you look like! You might as well tell the truth in your profile, so you'll have a qualified lead and not waste somebody's time.

4. List your real age. In the world of Internet dating, it seems like there's an abundance of 29- and 39-year-old women. "29" usually means somewhere in your 30's. And a woman who is "39" is usually in her 40's. Why start a potential relationship on a lie? Men are guilty of the same thing, and I advise them the same way.

5. I'm really glad you had a great time on your vacation, but you don't need to post 10 photos of your trip to Italy WITHOUT you in them. This is a dating site, not a trip advisor. Also, stop posting pictures of you skydiving, winter skiing, waterskiing, or doing anything else where we can't see what you look like in the picture.

6. Keep your profile short and to the point. Make your paragraphs very short. I've seen too many women's profiles that look like romance novels. Take a look at Yahoo! Sports and read an article in the sports section.
“All paragraphs are short so men can digest that information in short bursts.”

7. Don't be so self-absorbed. I've seen many women's profiles that say, "I want a man to be this," "I want a man to do that," "I want a man to cherish me," "I want a man to adore me"... You list all your "I wants" without listing what YOU will bring to the relationship. So you end up looking like you're a taker and not a giver. No man wants to be with a taker; he wants to be with someone who's equally willing to give and to receive.

8. Don't list your financial desires like you're posting a want ad. I've seen too many women write, "I'm looking for a man who will spoil me, buy me great things, and take me on great trips." You come across as a gold digger. Instead say, "I like the finer things in life to share with somebody," so you don't come across so harsh.

9. No baby talk! Even if the number one priority in your life is to be a mother, nothing scares a man off more than if you write in your profile about how badly you want kids. He may feel the same way, but he is going to think, "This woman will marry anybody to have kids." Write something a little more toned down like, "Families are important to me, and I can't wait to meet my special man so I can start a family." This shows you're selective and not just looking for someone with whom to make a kid.

10. Stop listing all your rules. Don't write things like "A perfect first date MUST be dinner" or "The man I date HAS to wear suits." Women tend to list rules in their profiles. Be open to a different kind of first date, or the kind of guy who wears jeans to work.

11. Stop sending winks. When is the last time you went to the supermarket, saw a cute guy and winked at him? Winks went out of style when "Happy Days" went off the air. You don't like it when men send you a wink. You think it makes him seem lazy and like he didn't read your profile. We think the same thing! So stop winking and start typing.

12. If you write to a man and he doesn't write you back, don't write a nasty follow-up email and ask him why he didn't write you back. If a man doesn't respond to you, it's the same thing as when you don't write a man back. It means that he is not interested. Don't get angry, just find another person.

13. We know you're looking at us, because we see that you've viewed our profile every day. Say "hello!" We're not going to bite. Lob that email in.
“Take a chance and send an email to the guy to whom you're most attracted.”
Take a chance and send an email to the guy to whom you're most attracted. You never know what might happen!

14. If a guy who you're interested in writes to you, stop playing games and write him back right away. Don't make him wait four days. He may find someone else in the time you wait to write him back. Keep the momentum going!
I have found when online dating that if you're honest about who you are, and you get back to people immediately, you'll get the date faster and avoid all the back and forth games that go on. Now go change that profile!
Ewe_Wish

Jul 18 @ 9:46PM  
Really good advice here Thomas, just out of curiosity how many dates have you gotten from this site........................oh damn I just broke one of the rules........
Lisa46

Jul 18 @ 9:52PM  
3. List your exact body type. It seems like on the Internet EVERYBODY is "athletic and toned," "petite" or "fit and trim." “He will find out what you look like!”
He will find out what you look like! You might as well tell the truth in your profile, so you'll have a qualified lead and not waste somebody's time.


Hey Thomas do you think they would get it If I just said I'm fuckin fat?? Or do I still write big and beautiful?
ThomasDaCat

Jul 18 @ 9:59PM  
just out of curiosity how many dates have you gotten from this site
Just YOU..... Ewe, darling

do you think they would get it If I just said I'm fuckin fat?? Or do I still write big and beautiful?
Lisa, hunni, you are not fat, you are FLUFFY!!! And you're a hawtie too!
Ewe_Wish

Jul 18 @ 10:43PM  
Just YOU..... Ewe, darling

Thomas, how many times do I have to tell you...........Cats and Sheep can't date.............My God............if they had offspring they would be called...........CHEEP!!
shewolf53

Jul 18 @ 11:04PM  
Here is a rule of internet dating for men. When you write someone don't pair it with a picture of your penis on the first e-mail and spend the whole e-mail telling a woman how kinky you are. That is just too much information for a first e-mail.
DickSlippery

Jul 19 @ 2:47AM  
The thing that simply AMAZES me is that these mistakes are common enough that a list had 2 be compiled 2 help us avoid them! U would think that the lack of positive responses would be a clue that something needs 2 change.

List your exact body type. It seems like on the Internet EVERYBODY is "athletic and toned," "petite" or "fit and trim."

Here's the deal, ladies. I don't care who U are or what U look like. There is somebody somewhere who is attracted 2 Ur EXACT body type. Its just that U have 2 find him. Sometimes thats easy. Some guys like blondes with big tits (ok ok...ALL guys like blondes with big tits. Bad example...). Some guys like big bitches. So they go 2 a site that features big bitches. Sometimes it is a little harder. If what rings Ur bell is Eskimo midgets in pleather, then it might take U a little longer, but eventually, if U keep scouring the ice, U are going 2 come across an Eskimo midget in pleather. Thats when U send her a picture of Ur dick.

One more thing and then I will be done. This doesn't really apply here (since we are talking about meeting online), but I feel like its important. Most women do not look the way that Us Weekly or TMZ define as beautiful. In fact, sometimes U may even find them downright unattractive the first time U meet. Then, as U start talking and getting 2 know one another U might learn things about her personality that begin 2 overshadow her physical shortcomings. Its weird, and it doesn't happen with every ugly girl out there, but sometimes U find out that U like her so much that U don't care what she looks like. And that effect works the other way as well. U might meet some chick with a beautiful face and body, but once she starts spouting off about how Hitler was a genius and his final solution would have worked if they'd only had two more years...well, she just doesn't look as attractive as she had at first. Don't get me wrong, Ur probably still going 2 fuck her. U just wont continue 2 see her since she's a Nazi and all.

I mean, come on...how the fuck are U supposed 2 explain some shit like that 2 Ur Nanna?

DS
onehornytoad69

Jul 19 @ 7:20AM  
1. Stop posting four different photos from four different stages in your life. This leaves a man wondering, "Who is this person?" I've looked through thousands of online profiles, and the majority of women will put up pictures from different stages of their life but not put up current pictures. All photos that you post on an online dating profile MUST BE CURRENT!!! He's going to find out what you look like when you meet, and there is no reason to lie about your looks.
AMEN!!! This is so true!!!!!
greenie for da cat!!!
RevDocLove

Jul 19 @ 9:19AM  

The real meaning behind the abbreviations in personal ads:
>> FIRST THE ADS FROM WOMEN (arrow down...the men are below)
>> Size 10 .................. Size 12 at least.
>> 40-ish.................. 48
>> Adventurer.............. Has had more partners than you ever will
>> Athletic................ Flat-chested
>> Average looking......... Ugly
>> Beautiful............... Pathological liar
>> Contagious Smile........ Bring your penicillin
>> Educated................ College dropout
>> Emotionally Secure...... Medicated
>> Feminist................ Fat; ball buster
>> Free spirit............. Substance user
>> Friendship first........ Trying to live down reputation as ****
>> Fun..................... Annoying
>> Gentle.................. Comatose
>> Good Listener........... Borderline Autistic
>> New-Age................. All body hair, all the time
>> Old-fashioned........... Lights out, missionary position only
>> Open-minded............. Desperate
>> Outgoing................ Loud
>> Passionate.............. Loud
>> Poet.................... Depressive Schzophrenic
>> Professional............ Real Witch
>> Redhead................. Shops the Clairol section
>> Reubenesque............. Grossly Fat
>> Romantic................ Looks better by candle light
>> Voluptuous.............. Very Fat
>> Weight proportional to height..................Hugely Fat
>> Wants Soulmate.......... One step away from stalking
>> Widow................... Nagged first husband to death
>> Young at heart.......... Toothless crone

>>> THE MALE SIDE OF THE LIST
>> 40-ish.................. 52 and looking for a 25-yr-old
>> Athletic................ Sits on the couch and watches ESPN
>> Average looking......... Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back
>> Educated................ Will always treat you like an idiot
>> Free Spirit............. Sleeps with your sister
>> Friendship first........ As long as friendship involves nudity
>> Fun..................... Good with a remote and a six pack
>> Good looking............ Arrogant
>> Honest.................. Pathological Liar
>> Huggable................ Overweight, more body hair than a bear
>> Like to cuddle.......... Insecure, overly dependent
>> Mature.................. Until you get to know him
>> Open-minded............. Wants to sleep with your sister but she's not interested
>> Physically fit.......... I spend a lot of time in front of mirror admiring myself
>> Poet.................... Has written on a bathroom stall
>> Spiritual............... Once went to church with his grandmother on Easter Sunday
>> Stable.................. Occasional stalker, but never arrested
>> Thoughtful.............. Says "Please" when demanding a beer
PinkToeNails

Jul 19 @ 9:21AM  
4. List your real age. In the world of Internet dating, it seems like there's an abundance of 29- and 39-year-old women. "29" usually means somewhere in your 30's. And a woman who is "39" is usually in her 40's. Why start a potential relationship on a lie? Men are guilty of the same thing, and I advise them the same way.

Amen to that one too!!

sarafinablu

Jul 19 @ 12:25PM  
CRAP!! all this shit is SO funny!!! Keep up the good work people!!

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Fatal Online Dating Errors