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The one where I complain about not having enough sex

posted 6/22/2009 8:03:24 PM |
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tagged: sex
  soonersoccer

Anyone who has read much of my blog knows I spend a lot of time worrying about my lack of sexual experience. Nothing has really changed for me in that regard. Despite what everyone on here tells me about it being unimportant, I do feel like I am really missing out on something. Obviously with how saturated our culture is with sex, it seems like it's what a guy my age is supposed to be doing. "Real" men sleep with someone every night. All the cool kids are doing it. From the looks of this website, every high schooler is getting laid on a regular basis, making me look like some kind of pathetic loser.

I think if I were sleeping with more women it would help me feel better about myself. I know I shouldn't have my self-esteem tied into who I sleep with, but I would feel more socially successful if I slept with more women. When I'm hanging out with the guys on the soccer team driving to a game, they often spend a lot of time talking about the crazy parties they went to all the girls they hooked up with. I feel bad that I can't contribute anything to these conversations. I feel like an outsider on a team that I am supposed to be a part of. Likewise, I think if I got to have more sex, I would feel better about the way I look and act. If I'm good looking, and I'm a smart/funny/nice/cool person, girls should want to have sex with me. Since most of them don't (since they're not having sex with me), that must mean I'm not any of those things, right?

Even when I do end up having sex with a girl, I wonder how my lack of experience will effect us. I always am afraid that my lack of experience will lead to a bad performance in bed. Nobody I have slept with has told me that I'm a bad lay, but that still doesn't stop me from worrying. Whenever I'm with a girl who has more experience than me, I feel intimidated. I feel like they are somehow better than me for being more successful in that aspect of their life. Even if I'm not bad, I doubt that I'm good. I want to be good at sex. I actually want to be good at everything I do, and that includes sex. All of the women I have slept with have made me feel great, I want to know that I can make them feel the same way. What if I fall for someone who is more experienced than I am in bed (which seems to be everyone), and she breaks up with me for not being good at sex?

A lot of what I love about sex isn't actually sex, it's just the physical relationship associated with it. There's no better feeling in the world than waking up next to a beautiful girl, especially if it's someone you love. I like having someone to cuddle up next to when I'm falling asleep. I like having someone to hold hands with, someone to kiss. I like knowing that someone cares about me enough to be there.

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Comments:

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Sunshine79

Jun 22 @ 9:04PM  
A lot of what I love about sex isn't actually sex, it's just the physical relationship associated with it. There's no better feeling in the world than waking up next to a beautiful girl, especially if it's someone you love. I like having someone to cuddle up next to when I'm falling asleep. I like having someone to hold hands with, someone to kiss. I like knowing that someone cares about me enough to be there.

Exactly!!!!
lunanegra

Jun 22 @ 9:32PM  
The thing is, you're like apart of the small handful of younger guys on here who actually know what they're talking about and want something more than just a hot fuck. Sad that the only way you're gonna get laid is to act like a complete douchebag, which I hope will never happen- too many of those out and about already.

Stay patient, stay true.
Taisen

Jun 22 @ 9:51PM  
This is the first blog I personally have seen from you but you seem like a nice guy from reading this. The amount of sexual relations with women you have does not matter to all women. The more experience does not matter. For instance, take my husband. He was only sexually involved with two other women before me so he didn't have alot of experience. That didn't bother me at all. He wasn't the best lover I had but he learned over time everything I like and knows how to please me now. I might have intimidated him like you mentioned but he never said a word. I was never pushy, didn't put him down and just helped him know what I liked without hurting his feelings. Not all women will be that way but not all will be rude either. All of us don't care about how good you are. Yes it's nice but there are more important things besides sexual experience in any relationship. Sex can be worked on, and perfected with the right partner over time. Patience and showing how much you care and enjoy her is a good thing. The harder you try and the more into you are the better it is. JMO.

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The one where I complain about not having enough sex