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How much of a friend are you?

posted 6/2/2009 11:50:31 PM |
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How much of a friend are you? I've always thought I was a pretty good friend to everyone, unless they give me reason not to be. Seems one of my friends has given me reason. I was sitting at one of my friends house last night, just shooting the shit, when in walked one of my daughter's friends. I've known this girl for years, she spent most of her tween and teen years at my house, sometimes weeks at a time.

She said she and her ex-husband (who still lives with her) were fussing and could she stay at my house because she had called the cops on him and she really didn't want to fight with him all night. I said yes, of course she could stay at my house. My daughter and her husband was there so she could just go on over there and make herself at home. I asked her if her kids were with her, she said two of them were. The girls, her little boy was at his grandmother's house.

I hung out at my friends house for a couple of hours and went home. They were still up when I got her, about 2 AM, kids and all, and on my computer. My house that I had cleaned earlier in the day was wrecked. Dishes everywhere, toys all over the floors in 3 rooms, beds in the bedrooms jumped on until the sheets and matress covers had come off the beds. I suggested everyone go to bed, especially the kids.

Finially at 3 AM they went to bed. At 9 AM I awoke to this young woman screaming at her youngest child at the top of her lungs. The kid crying her lungs out and the other kids running and playing. Needless to say I was not a happy camper. She proceeded to pack up the kids, saying they were hungry, hinting that I should feed them, when I didn't start cooking immediately, she put them in the car and left.

Left all the mess they had made, all the dishes, all the toys, and the mother of these children even told me she had pulled the curtains down in my living room when she woke up and couldn't figure out where she was. She had slept on the couch. Needless to say she didn't put the curtains back up, no she just left.

I told my daughter after she left that I hoped she asked me to stay at my house again when she and her idiot were fighting, I'd give the resounding NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NEVER AGAIN.

Oh and to top it all off I walked into the kitchen and the little girl had taken her diaper off and crapped in my kitchen floor. I had to clean that up too.

What would you think of this behavior? She's never done anything like this before, I had no idea that she would now. But I bet she never gets the chance to do it again.

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Jun 3 @ 12:19AM  
I'm just stuck at "Wow!"

I could never leave someone with that kind of mess.......I even pick up what's left under the table at restaurants when my kids are with me.......Wow.....

Jun 3 @ 12:27AM  
A person like that is not a friend in the first place. Makes you wonder what kind of conditions those kids are living in at home.

Jun 3 @ 12:31AM  
I feel sorry for the kids and the bad cards they were dealt in the game of life. By the grace of God perhaps there is a relative that is good people to take them in and raise them before any more emotion, mental damage is sustained.

What would you think of this behavior?

White trash.

Jun 3 @ 12:35AM  
I can't wrap my mind around that...that isn't behavior, that is complete disregard for others property and kindness. Sorry it happened. I would have been completely amazed. Your right, never let that happen again. Best wishes.

Jun 3 @ 12:56AM  
Wow! You went beyond the call of friendship to put up with that kind of behavior! Best thing you can do is never let it happen again.

Jun 3 @ 2:14AM  
That's not good, too much drama to put up with. Sounds like an irresponsible friend & parent with no regards for no one but herself. It's good you say there will not be a next time

Jun 3 @ 4:39AM  
Thanks for commenting on the blog. I was very surprised by this behavior, I'd never seen her do anything like this before. I guess she has changed since she stayed at my house so much in her younger years. She used to be such a good girl and was always helpful and the nicest friend my kids had.

I have learned my lesson with her now though. She'll never get the chance to do it again.

I do feel sorry for the kids, they don't deserve such treatment. If she had watched them and made them behave there wouldn't have been such a mess. Guess that is what they are used to though, if not they wouldn't have acted that way.

Needless to say I've spent the day cleaning house again today. I was supposed to go thrift store shopping with my friend from last night, but I couldn't leave my house in such a mess. Guess the shopping will have to wait until later in the week now.

Jun 3 @ 5:22AM  
My Friends Know Me..Well!!!
They Really know..that I don't put up with All that....BS!!!

Friends..respect Each other!!!
It sounds like your friend may have Other Problems..than the Break up!!
If this person Needed to come back... I would Lay it all on the Line..Straight up!!! I don't BS..anyone!!!
If it happened again.....We would still be friends... but they would be Living/Staying somewhere else!!!!
Yeah..I'm a Fool....Shoot me!!!

my 2 cents!

Jun 3 @ 8:04AM  
My kids don't behave like that at anyone's house. I keep control over my kids. Now, they do make messes here but they are kids. They also know how to clean up after themselves. Maybe that is part of why her and her ex husband fight. Weird they are divorced and still live together. My guess would be he stays for the kids. Sorry to hear you had to clean up all of that. Common sense and curtesy, when someone is helping you out yoo clean up after yourself and your kids.

Jun 3 @ 8:34AM  
She stepped over a big black line. I would have went ballistic.

Jun 3 @ 9:00AM  
Wow! Sounds like you had a bunch of monkeys at your house. Good thing she left on her own and took her brats wit her.

Jun 3 @ 9:22AM  
Now, playing devil's advocate, not what I probably would feel if I were in that situation.. just a possibility.

It could be that the girl is going through one of those depression related breakdowns. I know that when I did, I let my kids run wild and crap piled up like crazy in my house. Yeah.. I have to admit it was not a good time, it was abusive to my children and it was not good for me either. I felt like I had no control over anything, so just let it all wash over me.

I don't know the girl so I can't say for sure.. but it IS a possibility.

I'da still been pissed though.. if it had happened in my house.

Jun 3 @ 11:39AM  
It could be that the girl is going through one of those depression related breakdowns.

Skwirl has a good point. I know after Mick's death, I hit rock bottom where I just didn't care. But, I do know that I would never, EVER, take such advantage of a friends kindness and generosity. But, that's me. I agree with you on never letting it happen again.

Jun 3 @ 11:17PM  
I was thinking the same thing as Skwirl said.........but either way you don't deserve to have your house trashed.

Jun 3 @ 11:42PM  
She may very well be on the edge emotionally.......but I probably still would have went ballistic when I saw it. Then maybe been able to talk with her about it.

I couldn't imagine doing that to a friend.

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How much of a friend are you?