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Incompatible Music and Dating

posted 5/30/2009 1:11:25 PM |
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The blog today by manwithoutahorse got me to thinking and remembering. Music is still important to me but not nearly as much as it was in my teens and twenties. Music was integral to the social scene back then.

My question is this; did you ever enjoy the company of somebody you were dating but one or both people was into music the other one couldn't stand? Maybe you would go to a party or a club that one was into, only for the other to not be able to handle the loud rock or get bored to death by the country? I have, and in my youth it could easily be a deal breaker.

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May 30 @ 1:23PM  
When I was young I wouldn't have cared if she liked Himalayan Line Dancing (I don't really think there is such a thing, just making a point), if I thought she was hot I would've listened to anything. Now that I'm older and wiser (I think) I have avoided even asking people out who don't have similar interests in music. Music is actually more important to me today than it was when I was young. If she can't sit through a blues act, or a country act, then we will never even date.

May 30 @ 1:26PM  
I'm country and a man I lived with for 5 years was blues, jazz and rock okay now I like some blues and jazz still can't stand rock from mid 80's to current

May 30 @ 1:29PM  
My late husband and I had totally different ideas of what good music was. I couldn't stand his and he couldn't stand mine. It really didn't make any difference in our relationship, he listened to his when I was at work, and I listened to mine going to and coming home from work. When we were together we usually were doing something and if music was playing we would listen to the golden oldies because it was something we could both stand lol When we went for rides in the car, the rule was, whoever drives picks the music and the other one shuts up about it lol it worked for us. I would never not get to know someone or date someone that didn't like the same music as the program House well that's a different story....

May 30 @ 2:39PM  
About a dozen years ago I had a girlfriend. We were great in the bedroom, kitchen, and going out to dinner. But that was it. We normally didn't get into music too much as there was virtually no middle ground. Once I came home from work and there were candles lit and she was in a black negligee. It was going to be a nice night because she was a very fun lady. After I got a shower and put on a robe that she had bought. She led me to a chair in the living room and gave me a glass of wine. I was a bit tired but enthused over the prospects for the evening. Then, in the candlelight, she went over and turned the CD was Kenny Rogers. Within about twenty minutes I was asleep. She wasn't pleased. Many women appreciate an honest man but my explanation that, music that is romantic to one person is boring to another wasn't appreciated.

A few months later we decided to go to a movie. She wanted to see the new Star Trek flick, but tickets were sold out. That put her in a bad mood. We opted to go see Mars Attacks instead. It is a campy weird flick with an all star cast. It sort of a War of the Worlds satire. The twist is that what killed the martians was Slim Whitman music. When a martian accidently heard it, his head exploded. I burst out laughing hysterically the first time it happened and so did several other people. She was pissed and offended, and failed to see what was funny. She seriously didn't get it. I explained to her that being "exposed to shitty music is fatal for them." It turns out she liked Slim Whitman. Within two weeks we were no longer dating.

May 30 @ 2:40PM  
Wow, Ewe Wish & I are twins. Chuckle, he likes country ( i don't mind it but not my fav.) & i like classical. So when we weren't together listened to the kind we liked when together with kids I also kept it on country ( my kids like country). But , yeah it would be easier if you liked the same types. But i have yet to meet a person i was interested in that likes groups like Il Divo, Andrea Bocelli, or Barry Manilow. So it wouldn't be a deal breaker chcukle.

May 30 @ 4:34PM  
My 2 cents...are...
That we can Learn a Lot about a how they choose their Music!!!
If a Person..will only Listen to One ..Type of music..and Not anything else......
this Person is Most likely Closed Minded, in many ways!!! Not all...but many are like that!!
That's a big Red flag for "me"!!!

I have dated many that liked other types of music...than I do...but All were Open minded.. like I am....and we mixed it up.....!!!
just my 2 cents!

May 30 @ 5:18PM  
No offense to any country fans but it is still like someone scratching on a blackboard to me. But then again someone into country probably would not appreciate the music I like either which is metal. One thing you learn in retail is to tune out music, a good thing since the new JC Penney song is country. So I can go for a little while to a country bar as long as no one says hey listen to that. I told them at work I want to pick the next song and want it done by Ozzie. I find though if someone likes completely different music then perhaps there are other areas where there will be differences also that turns out to be the real deal breaker.

May 30 @ 7:42PM  
I "dated" 1 girl who was totally into country and I can't fuckin stand it. She was a really good fuck tho and we made it work for a few months. "dated" another girl who just absolutely hated rock music....all kinds of it. If she didn't do all the shit I liked in bed we wouldn't have lasted 14 minutes but instead we just fucked each other senseless til the time came for us to part ways.

May 30 @ 7:55PM  
I got booted out of a Stephen F. Austin dorm room from a girl I was seeing for the second date for making fun of the way Bon Jovi put make up on like a woman in a video we were watching. We both liked the artist & the music , I just didn't know I would offend her by that. Come to find out she liked men that wore make up in every day life.

May 30 @ 8:17PM  
I just got finished with listening to one of my "country" heroes..Marty Robbins...
Probably the smoothest C/W singer who ever lived..
Of course it didn't hurt to be a neighbor in Glendale, Az. in the early 50's..
He gave me my first Gibson EB3 Bass for my 16th b/day..

May 30 @ 8:27PM  
If you try to inundate me with Rap or Chinese opera it is definitely a deal breaker! Otherwise my musical taste is eclectic and runs the gamut from RnR, blues, jazz, R&B, Doo Wop, bluegrass (a la Dr. Ralph Stanley), some C&W, Gregorian chants, classical, Hawaiian slack key guitar, flamenco, Scottish, and a whole lot more.

I'm interested in music because it's an essential part of my life. If someone has similar musical taste/appreciation fabulous, but if not there are ways to work around it as stated by Ewe and OHT.

I was recently introduced to Charles Aznavour. First time around the block I was not impressed. Second time I discovered a couple of cuts I enjoyed. Since then a friend sent me a CD and I'm a fan... not a groupie, but I'm glad I found something new to listen to.

May 30 @ 8:40PM  
I just got finished with listening to one of my "country" heroes..Marty Robbins...
Probably the smoothest C/W singer who ever lived.

He did have a wonderful voice.
Out in the west Texas town of El Paso....
I am not C &W and when we were on our way to my grandparents before the freeways, my dad turned on the radio to a top 40 station at my mother's request. The song, El Paso came on. When I died at the end of that song , I said, "Good, maybe he won't sing any more." The radio was turned off.

May 31 @ 12:51AM  
I can probably find at least one song I enjoy out of every genre, so its not a problem. But hardcore fans of Insane Clown Posse, Nickleback, Linkin Park, Hinder and their related ilk are probably dealbreakers..unless they listened to it for ironic value.

May 31 @ 1:22AM  
Here's a cool piano tune:
Carl Sonny Leyland

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Incompatible Music and Dating