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Very Fine Line Between Two Strong Emotions...

posted 5/12/2009 3:02:13 PM |
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I spoke with a friend earlier today. Her and I have been friends for a really long time but have recently drifted apart for a few reasons....... hers and mine.

She has been married for quite a few years but has been unhappy most of them. He is a really good guy, when he's sober.....problem is that isn't very often at all. But it's his life and his choice.

Not too long ago they split up but within a week stopped fighting all the time and started seeing each other and he spends the night almost every night. Until she has her fill again and they have the discussion about he isn't changing or growing up and yadda yadda... and he says he's an adult he can drink when he wants all he wants and if she doesn't like it yadda yadda..same discussion, different day. Nothing going anywhere or doing any changing on either side. But they now have terrible fights and say things that are extremely cruel and mean and can never be taken back.

Some days I wonder if they still love each other or if it's slipped across that fine line to other emotions and they just go through the motions of trying to be together out of habit. Or fear. Either way, in my opinion, it's sad.

I've always heard there is a very fine line between love and hate. I know either can cause you to do things that you you wouldn't normally do. Whether good or bad.

But which emotion do you think is stronger.... LOVE or HATE...and why?
Which can have more control over your actions and behavior?

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Comments:

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onehornytoad69

May 12 @ 3:28PM  
But which emotion do you think is stronger.... LOVE or HATE...and why?
Which can have more control over your actions and behavior?

Personally.... I think....On the short run..Hate is Stronger than Love...But...On the Long Run...Love is stronger!!!
But... its like what you have said..already....
But they now have terrible fights and say things that are extremely cruel and mean and can never be taken back.
We get Pissed off....(thats short term) Say/Do hurtful things...(Thats long term)...and after a while..the short term has Built up..a bunch of Long time ...Hate!!!...Then..hate will win the Battle!!!
My 2 cents!
irisetoit

May 12 @ 3:32PM  
Newton's Law.....Equal but Opposite action/reaction.....Hate can go as far on the scale as Love, but in the opposite direction.

Everything you can imagine that you would do for love, you would do for hate....It's a natural Human emotional swing.

visualone209

May 12 @ 4:06PM  
I think I agree with Irisetoit. I say I think I do as that makes the most sense to me, but I have never hated anyone really. A lot I didn't like or was afraid of, but I don't think I ever hated anyone. I am very fortunate, I have a husband of 31 years that is my soul mate and many dear friends over the years. I probably shouldn't have tried to comment on this one.

I say I hate this or that or when something happens, but that is a figure of speech. I very bad criminal commits a terrible crime, especially against a child, I will hate that, but I don't think that is the same thing as you are talking about. Hope I didn't confuse this to much.
Laura
Lisa46

May 12 @ 4:16PM  
You know I'm 49 and there is only one man I said I I hated. I know that is such a strong word. When I went to his mom's funeral a few years ago the hate was gone. I still can't say I wish him well, but Love?? I say I love you to those people who are in my life, and I feel much affection for. There are different kinds of love, I tell Steve I love him ( like a brother) You CL, cause you are an angel. Love goes thru many emotions.

You know your friends may love each other but just can't be together?
Sunshine79

May 12 @ 4:53PM  
Some days I wonder if they still love each other or if it's slipped across that fine line to other emotions and they just go through the motions of trying to be together out of habit. Or fear. Either way, in my opinion, it's sad.

I've always heard there is a very fine line between love and hate. I know either can cause you to do things that you you wouldn't normally do. Whether good or bad.

That right there explains alot.......at least for me.
Cootiesprayer

May 12 @ 5:25PM  
i was her not to long ago. I think it's the same damn thing. She is not ready to let go yet, when she is she will just do it. It's not easy & yes fear plays a big part. She is lucky to have a good friend like you.
somnium

May 12 @ 5:50PM  
Hope I didn't confuse this to much.


Sometimes, I'm good at doing just that!

Seems like most people use those two words- "love" and "hate" loosely in their day-to-day conversations!

I'm thinking that the word "hate" is really a loose abbreviated form of expression for someone or something, that doesn't give you any pleasure!

I'm thinking that the word "love" is really a loose abbreviated form of expression for someone or something, that you enjoy in a friendly way or doing!

I think if you truly "hate" someone or something, you want to be as far away as possible from that person or thing. It's negative and unhealthy for you! And it can get real ugly, real fast!

I think if you truly "love" someone or something, it's an on going work in progress! You do things for someone to make them happy or you're doing things to maybe improve the "thing" you're working on! Both are healthy for you! And is very important towards a happier life!

I could be wrong but it just seems that some couples, aren't happy unless they're fighting about something most every day!!








But sometimes................................................................... life just SUCKS!! .............................

J/K

Anyway- just how I see it!

aspiringwriter

May 12 @ 9:37PM  
I think Sunshine is right about the situation. I really like the questions you asked at the end, but I'm hesitant to answer because I think it's too meaty a topic to get into, especially since I've left 2 long answers on your last blog, so I'll just drop my green thing and wander off.
dmbchick420

May 12 @ 9:49PM  
Good question, but I agree with Sunshine too. You know the old saying..."Can't live with them and can't live without them."

I also have a friend going through this, but they are both big drinkers and get into some nasty fights. I worry a lot about my friend also...such an unhealthy relationship
manwithoutahorse

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May 13 @ 10:40AM  
I was on a retreat once where the theme of the retreat was "Love/Hate: Opposite sides of a two headed coin". I believe they are equal and opposite emotions comeing from the same place...one positive, one negative. We can choose which one to focus on. After our marriage of 29 years ended, I still love my ex wife. I hate what she does to me; each of us have issues that push each other's buttons. I choose not to be married to her any longer because the "crazy-making" was causing the negative emotions to grow stronger than the positive. We both deserved more than that.
theSkwirl

May 13 @ 1:33PM  
Hate is simply love that's been turned to pain. So they are both equally strong.. and can both be destructive if left unchecked.. yes you can love too much.

Sigh.. sounds like old habits with that couple though.. it's convenient.. it's easy.. it's not love.

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Very Fine Line Between Two Strong Emotions...