"OMG, its time for the Friday night chatrooms and I'm all out of K-Y Jelly". Ladies and gentleman, have you ever planned a big night, full of erotic fun and suddenly found that you have no K-Y Jelly? Well, the solution is not at Wal-Mart, the grocery store or even your neighborhood drugstore. It's right in your kitchen. Forget the bathroom, forget Vaseline and body and hand lotions. It,s right in your kitchen. Try...LARD. its all natural, bio-degradeable and it'll make that fun spot...flaky as Aunt Bessie's pie crust. No Lard? Try BUTTER. It'll give you that ssweet cream flavor and make you a nice golden brown. No Butter? Then use all veetable CRISCO. It's light, its slippery, it'll, as in the words of Loretta Lynn, DO YOU PROUD EVER TIME. And it'll make that special part of your anatomy...TASTE LIKE GRANDMA'S FRIED CHICKEN!!!
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