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posted 5/5/2009 2:33:06 PM |
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  Passionmonster

Was reading that most women here prefer to blog as apposed to having sex, I don't know why I sign up for shit like this knowing 99% of women just aren't wired for sex like men are. I'm so tired of unreliable, incomprehensible, psychotic, emotionally needy, sexually uninterested, ignorant, self righteous women. They have all become so trite. Maybe I need to start focusing on women who are either younger then me and still think they need to screw a guy to keep him around, or much older then me and have had enough experience with men and hopes dashed that they understand why I'm here, what I'm good for and how great friendships can arise out of casual sex. No matter how desperate I get I could never see myself forcefully taking what I want, never the less I am starting to scare myself with the lengths I seem to be able to go just for sex. Where I grew up, CA, the age of consent was 18 and when I hit 18 I was meticulous about how I went about meeting women so as to avoid jail time. I always figured that it was a good age as any younger then that and they are still too naive and easily manipulated. Here in OH the age of consent is 16 and I find myself warming up to the idea of getting to know that younger crowed the longer I go without sex.

This site (http://health.dailynewscentral.com/content/view/896/62) gave an interesting report on birth control pills and how they could be destroying the female sexual libido...forever. I am honestly to the point where I long for this in myself, an escape from urge and frustration, from a drive that I fear will inevitably lead me to a life of deceit and manipulation. This is not what I want and yet it is, I'm so completely confused about who or what I am suppose to be or do in relation to sex. I've always wanted to and tried to be a good person, but this drive has slowly been getting the best of me and I know it's only a matter of time before it narrows my vision to the point that sex is all I can see or care about.

I may even start looking into taking prozac or zoloft just to see if i can rid myself of these urges.

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