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Girls Don't Poop!!!

posted 4/9/2009 7:50:48 PM |
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tagged: fuck, funny, girls, sunshine
  Sunshine79

I was at a friends house and we were all talking and o ne of the guys there said "Girls don't poop!"

I wanted to laugh out loud so hard!! I remember when I first started dating this guy, I moved in and for a month, I never farted.

Thanksgiving camed and I was supposed to meet his parents or the 1st time and I was in some terrible pain while at dinner at his parents.

I ended up in the hospital with what they thought was appendicitus (sp?) and I was freaked out. Well, after drinking a ton of stuff that would glow in my belly and all kinds of tests, poking and prodding they found nothing. And I was still in agony.....

Turns out, it was just gas...........and man....it HURT!!!!!!

I vowed after that, that I'd never hold a fart in again....lol

So, my question is....How far into a relationship is an ok enough time to let out a fart?

Anyone wanna fuck?

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Comments:

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xquseme

Apr 9 @ 8:00PM  
First date--beer drinking and farting contest!
Meena

Apr 9 @ 8:03PM  
The 2nd time together. After that, you can let it allllll out
Cootiesprayer

Apr 9 @ 8:12PM  
I take it you didn't read Bandit's blog. I personally, if i have to fart, will try to do a silent one. Hey if you gotta fart let it out, it's not good to hold things in
flavorbuster

Apr 9 @ 8:24PM  
At least you have some respect I was on a first date w/ a girl who farted & laughed like a teenie bopper now I understand being down to earth but I just met her ... Actually I think the irritable laugh is what hit a nerve otherwise If warned I might of said let her rip It's best to do it right away to not blowup
girlcountry

Apr 9 @ 8:59PM  
Could always go in another room until comfortable with that....even after being married to hubby for 2 years, I still go in another room!! But that's just me!!
Wordsofwit

Apr 9 @ 9:12PM  
Sooner or later reality will enter into the festivities. Let me create a scenario, not uncommon, we can go out for a nice INDULGENT meal; it could be Italian, Greek, Mexican, Seafood, Cajun, Barbecue, Steak, Chinese, or any American entree resulting from diversity. The reality is America is much more diverse than it was 25 years ago.

Now this is just one man speaking, and I anticipate a few supporters. I want to see immigrants teaching their children English.

They are! I am currently grading essays by seventh graders in the state of Texas. Over the last five years, I have seen a tremendous improvement. The Spanish speaking kids have done particularly well
PinkToeNails

Apr 9 @ 9:18PM  
Bruce! This blog is about pooping! (freaking Sunshine) this is cracking me up!!!
I thought you were headed somewhere Bruce but you veered way out into left field somewhere!! LMAO!!!

I will agree with you tho... speaka da English!!
zaralyon

Apr 9 @ 10:03PM  
Hell on the first few dates I tend to go to the bathroom for that, but if he's met my Mother and is still around then he can handle a fart.
themama

Apr 9 @ 10:38PM  
I would have to say on the second date.... Then let it rip after that...
bandit892

Apr 9 @ 10:49PM  
one girl i was engaged to we were together for about 4 months and i was hiding my farts pretty good till one day i felt one building up in me i knew no good could come from this if it got loose i thought if i could just get alone for a few seconds i could leave it all behind me but she all of a sudden wanted to hug me i kept trying to back away but she caught me me and let's just say she squeezed the shit out of me she was stunned for a few mins but after some good counseling she was able to work through the shock and in a few weeks her eyebrows even grew back
Tyme_Ryder

Apr 10 @ 1:34AM  
I usually excuse myself and disappear till it's over.
waynuckingfutz

Apr 10 @ 5:46AM  
How far into a relationship is an ok enough time to let out a fart?
Anytime before the conventional explosion backs up and turns nuclear.

I want to see immigrants teaching their children English.
Farting is a universal language.

she was able to work through the shock and in a few weeks her eyebrows even grew back
She hung around THAT long? That MUST be love!

I dunno -
1. I might grade her farts on a scale of 1-10 and encourage improvement if necessary.

2. I might wait until at least the third date before I farted AND pulled the covers over her head. But hey - that's just me.


surv6969

Apr 10 @ 10:40AM  
I think once you are comfortable with someone it shouldn't matter, it is kinda rude but oh well. But I still prefer to go in the other room to fart. I don't like to smell it so might as well do it where I am not going to be.
DarkKnightWalking

Apr 10 @ 1:13PM  
An Avon lady was making her rounds in a huge apartment building when she had a gas attack. Quickly concluding her stop, she all but ran for the elevator, intending to go outside to pass gas. Once in the elevator though the pains became too much to bear, so she let it rip. And it reeked BADLY. Thinking quickly, she whipped a can of air freshener out of her Avon bag and doused the elevator with it. A few floors down, a guy gets on. After the doors closed and it went down a couple floors, he suddenly sniffed and said "What is that aroma?" Proud as she could be and hoping for a new customer, she said "That's an Avon air freshener. How do you like it?" He sniffed again and said,
"Smells like someone shit a Christmas Tree."
paulywalnuts

Apr 10 @ 1:17PM  
Hmm....."To Fart or not to Fart"....now that is the question......
waynuckingfutz

Apr 10 @ 4:44PM  
"Smells like someone shit a Christmas Tree."

Cootiesprayer

Apr 10 @ 4:50PM  
DKW! You rock! rofl. these are hilarious you guys.
StraddleMyNose

online now!
Apr 11 @ 7:41AM  
How far into a relationship is an ok enough time to let out a fart?
Like NEVER! Do it in private!

This almost sounded like one of my blogs
JustLusting4u

Apr 12 @ 10:07AM  
Ladies dont fart thy tooooooot
xquseme

Apr 12 @ 11:44AM  
"Smells like someone shit a Christmas Tree."
But, it's not the Christmas tree part that's painful...it's passing all those ornaments!
TastyCupcake

Apr 12 @ 8:08PM  
Ladies dont fart thy tooooooot


That reminds me of something my friend's father told me once, "Animals sweat; men perspire, and women glow."

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Girls Don't Poop!!!