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Reacting versus Initiating

posted 3/27/2009 6:00:18 PM |
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  manwithoutahorse

Every three months or so I conduct an experiment. It's more for my own piece of mind than any scientific test, but it serves a very important purpose. For a period of time I do not send an email or comment on a blog or initiate an IM until I hear from someone else here on AMD. This time I went 5 days, from Sunday until Friday, with no email, blog comment to me, or Instant Message.

I'm not complaining, because actually, this is a good reminder that AMD is an just one way to communicate with others, not the only way. I've also been busy with work and watching college basketball. NCAA, NIT, Women's NCAA, they all comtribute to what I think is the best time of year. The days are longer, they are warmer, we even are starting to see a little green. I'm running more regularly, I'm traveling more trying to save the business, and I've found a few really cool bands playing locally. So life isn't bad and I'm not going to throw myself off a bridge because my friends here on AMD seldom write or IM me. I don't take it personal.

It is a common thing here on AMD. Since there are more men online, the women get far more contacts than any of us men, and spend more time replying to mail. And if someone is active in the blogs, they are busy writing and replying to comments. Just normal.

And isn't that why many of us are here? We spend most of our life reacting to situations. After we've finished our work day, or spent the day looking for work, or spent the day LIVING our work, we seldom have a great deal of energy. It's easier to sit at the keboard, read, and react. To not to think about initiating a contact, to not have to screw up the courage and energy to put yourself out there in cyberspace, to just react. No need to Initiate when you're busy Reacting.

But isn't that one reason our world is in the state it is? Too many people reacting rather than initiating?

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Reacting versus Initiating
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Comments:

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1bunny629

Mar 27 @ 6:07PM  
Yes. I am not initiating anything. Haven't been for a long time. Hi...good to see you!
onehornytoad69

Mar 27 @ 6:16PM  
Awesome blog,... though, I Just lived... the otherside..... I'm no fun!!!!
Good luck...!!!!!!!
NightOfOld

Mar 27 @ 6:17PM  

Good to see you back my friend.

I know what you mean. When I disapear no one notices.
Wordsofwit

Mar 27 @ 7:02PM  
I rarely initiate an email without it being related to a blog. I get enough as it is. Now if somebody is conspicuously absent like the Prez, I might.
loveslife158

Mar 27 @ 7:41PM  
lunanegra

Mar 27 @ 7:44PM  
Wondering where you were. Also most the bulk of my emails here come from the regs but no one else emails me. Does it matter? No. I kinda like my self-imposed isolation. Feels good.
dumblonde

Mar 27 @ 8:01PM  
others dont notice when you leave but notice when you come back!!!!
whisperingcomet

Mar 27 @ 8:29PM  
Hey we had a severe ice storm where aI live, and I was basicly off line for six weeks, and no one noticed...so I know what ya mean
soft_touch938

Mar 27 @ 8:47PM  
I am notorious at not initiating anything....e-mails...phone calls...texting...IMing. It's a self esteem thingy I think with me...or fear of rejection...or both. I figure no one really wants to hear from me anyway and besides everyone is busy and don't wanna be bothered with my un-busy-ness. I figure if they really wanna talk to me then they know where to find me and I'm more than happy to gab awhile.

If you remember maybe a year ago I talked about my fear of making phone calls...I never call someone first and even when I get to know them it's almost more than I can do to place a call for no other reason than to visit with them. Same with e-mails and IMing....I think it's my own personal phobia....
ThePurpleProphet

Mar 27 @ 8:57PM  
Ms. Comet, that's not true. Check that other site we are on together. I sent you a note or two.
selectusername

Mar 29 @ 5:39AM  
Running?! Traveling?! Watching bands?!

What the hell are you doing, getting a life or something?!

The rest of us prefer to exist only in cyberspace......

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Reacting versus Initiating