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A Damn Fine Explanation

posted 3/11/2009 10:54:19 PM |
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tagged: joke, wife
  waynuckingfutz

A DAMN FINE EXPLANATION

The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom
making love to a very attractive young woman.

And she was somewhat upset. 'You are a disrespectful pig!' she
cried. 'How dare you do this to me -- a faithful wife, the mother
of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce right away!'

And the husband replied, 'Hang on just a minute love, so at least I
can tell you what happened.' 'Fine, go ahead,' she sobbed,' but
they'll be the last words you'll say to me!'

And the husband began -- 'Well, I was getting into the car to
drive home, and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She
looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and
let her into the car.

I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty.
She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days.

So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the
enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat
because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing
devoured them in moments.

Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a shower, and while
she was doing that, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of
holes, so I threw them away.

Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that
you have had for a few years, but don't wear because you say they
are too tight.

I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present,
which you don't wear because I don't have good taste.

I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you
don't wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you
bought at the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at
work has a pair the same.'

The husband took a quick breath and continued - 'She was so
grateful for my understanding and help that as I walked her to the
door, she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, 'Please,
do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?'

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A Damn Fine Explanation
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Comments:

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surv6969

Mar 12 @ 12:25AM  
that was a good one
onehornytoad69

Mar 12 @ 3:10AM  
RevDocLove

Mar 12 @ 9:58AM  
It all sounds reasonable to me....
I've had to explain things like that several times in my life
Sunshine79

Mar 12 @ 10:34AM  
How could you blame him???

Greenie!!!

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A Damn Fine Explanation